Harms: Cats crush cockroach with sleight of hand and weight of boot

SATURDAY night and I’m at the Punt Road end of the MCG. Behind glass. Thanks to a kind invitation from Bruce Houston and the Tatts Group who are obviously working their way through the share register. My portfolio is made up exclusively of Tatts shares, 231 from memory, a wedding gift from Bimbo Read and [Read more]

AFL Prelim Finals: Pies are simply not good enough

It’s 6pm. I’m sitting in my room and the rain starts to belt down on to the roof, making that familiar and comforting sound. I’m watching a replay of Carlton v Adelaide in my room, just for the sake of watching a high-scoring game. I realise it’s an hour and a half before the bounce, [Read more]

Haiku Bob: AFL Finals – week 3 – oceans of torment

heavy rain – beyond the old picket fence oceans of torment swirling sky beneath dark clouds and umbrellas Harry spears the first downpour – one Cat then another bobs up rain stops – our defence leaks Ablett sky clears Leon has left us too wanting the scores to be different I drink more moon spills [Read more]

AFL Prelim Finals: Pies’ loss hurts like hell

By Paul Fahey Well …  I have sat down a few times to write the report but until this morning I could not really muster the energy or enthusiasm to really revisit the match! On Sunday, as I have done following previous finals losses, I chose to not really communicate with the outside world – [Read more]

AFL Prelim Finals: Cats turn Pies inside out to storm into Grand Final

After not attending either semi-final, Dad and I decided to lift our game and attend both prelim finals. As we walk through the Fitzroy Gardens it becomes obvious that Collingwood’s playing. We’re surrounded by beer, cigarettes, Collingwood chants and very few teeth. We pass a herd of Collingwood fans at a barbecue in the car [Read more]

AFL Prelim Finals: Thoughts of Finland begin to drift in as Cats demolish Pies

It’s a heavily anticipated preliminary final, there’s a massive crowd at the MCG and they are making a massive amount of noise. I add my own as the popcorn cooks. Pendlebury is a late withdrawal and it’s no surprise really. Three weeks recovery for a broken leg is rather absurd. From the first bounce, the [Read more]

General Footy Writing: Wild Cats (Felis catus) take centre route to big kill

Throughout the land fans of at least four footy tribes are all a little excited. Maybe it is just a spring thing but for some it is has deteriorated into a serious nervous affliction. This was worryingly apparent in the weekly words from Cat tragic and fellow ‘Knacker” John Harms in this morning’s Age. Plagues [Read more]

AFL Preliminary Finals: What’s this business that the Pies have the wood on Geelong?

Here’s one for the Collingwood fans. At the completion of Geelong’s annus horribilis in 2006 the club was determined to trade Steve Johnson. Give us a second-round draft pick and we’ll throw in a set of steak knives, club officials said. Collingwood seemed interested. Geelong would have thrown in two sets of steak knives if [Read more]