Off Season Odyssey – Part 12: Aussie Humour

AUSSIE HUMOUR.   “No tribal colours,” the bouncer tells me, holding his hand out. We both look at the North jumper I’m wearing. “It’s okay, he’s with the band,” Gav says. “I know the band,” the bouncer says. He’s from Warrnambool. So are the Monaros. Like the King and Queen are from England, and David Boon [Read more]

Off Season Odyssey – Part 11: New Year’s Without Resolutions

Off Season Odyssey Pt11.   New Year’s Without Resolutions.   Princetown has a beaut oval. Round. Hard. There’s no team any more, no town. Just the reedy wetlands that is the last gasp of the Gellibrand River, where farmers, back in the day, paddled their milk downstream, on longboats, to the Saturday market. Just coastal [Read more]

Off Season Odyssey – Part 10: Pre-season is Serious Business

  “Come have a kick!” I say to Louie. We were teammates at Otway for three years. I have no idea how, yet here he is, on the coast, working in Kenty’s Surf Shop. “Up yours, Zurbo! It’s summer. You haven’t changed.”

Off Season Odyssey – Part 9: The Bandidos

  After a few big days in the bush, spraying in the gullies, and clearing fireweed, I come down from the hills to have a surf not far off sunset – the good, stupid, lazy kind that hurts no-one. Not the kids on boogie boards I can’t dodge, not me or the water. Jumping in [Read more]

Off-Season Odyssey Part 7: Alcohol und Footyball

  This Odyssey is turning me into an alcoholic. Each stop, old teammates badger me: “We haven’t seen you in years! And you don’t want to have a drink with us?!” So we kick, then drink, as if a little run around has earned it. Each stop I pick up a few more good memories [Read more]

Off Season Odyssey Part 6: Excaliball

Footyhead of the Cove… Devil’s Kitchen, Moonlight Head, Victoria. I hope all the Knackers have a corker of a season on and off the oval next year. Matt Zurbo.

Brett’s Last Hurrah

  Hello? Yes, Brett. What? You don’t want me to call you Brett today? Oh. Mr. Ratten? No? Um… Rats? Yes, yes, I can hear you… Oh, I thought you were cursing. Serious? Jesus on a cross? What, as if it’s a name? I know, yes I know you still have three hours to go [Read more]

Discussion: Today’s Champions

    Right now I’m wondering if Martin Pike was a Champion. Four Premierships, All-Australians. A B&F. He did it in winning sides, he did it with no support at Fitzroy. What about John Blakey? Rohan Smith? Both played over 300 games of elite level football. Many say you can’t reach that number without being [Read more]

Footy Poetry: Josh

Matt Zurbo is at a footy-watching, beer-drinking, rock’n’roll, Saturday night thirtieth.

Friday footy is a beautiful thing

Friday Footy is a Beautiful Thing.   I finished work not long after sunset, watching the moon wobble up from, then across, the mountains. It was almost full, but not, as if someone had dropped it on its head. As I came down the logging tracks into the valley, towards the nearest farms, that lead [Read more]

From Matt Zurbo

Readers,   I am addicted to football. I am broke because of it. My body’s a mess because of it. I damn well love it. As do millions.   I wrote the Community Cup piece in haste, and bad mood. And painfully regret it. It IS a great day, for a worthy cause, that many [Read more]