Vive la Revolution

Sources within the football world have disclosed that for twelve months discussions have taken place within the cloistered walls of AFL House, and out of earshot in Gosch’s Paddock, regarding the expansion of the league’s ‘no loyalty policy’ beyond the fertile breeding ground of just players and club officials to achieve the Holy Grail.

Fuelled by fears that the football proletariat are gaining broad support across the nation for their ‘Give Us Back Our Game’ campaign the AFL Politiburo standing committee on attitude realignment have decided to take a no nonsense approach and crush the dissent.

It is believed that the AFL have recently engaged the services of Cleo Toystore, fourth generation anarchist of Russian descent, to develop a ‘divide and conquer white’ paper. The first recommendations of her sensitive, and subsequently highly classified, document are believed to have been subtly implemented throughout the latter part of the 2010 AFL season the undisclosed source said.

Unwittingly the highly visible, yet apparently generally unpopular, national society of ‘Black and White Shirts’ have been the foot soldiers in this clandestine and sinister campaign.

The source says that the ‘Supreme Leader’ is apparently delighted with the current state of anarchy with uncontrolled mobs of crazed fans roaming the urban streets and rural carriageways of the Antipodes causing others to stay silently indoors fearing for their lives.

Triggered by the assassination of football, as we knew it, in Melbourne less than a week ago by the ‘black and white hand’, the nation has been rocked as was the world by the events in Sarajevo on September 28th 1914.

While this well choreographed distraction has the football world polarised, in true ‘night of the long knives’ spirit during the posturing for pole position in a later catastrophic event assisted by the ‘Black and White Shirts’, the next phase, a contemporary clandestine ornithological thin out ‘Operation Magpie’ ordered by the Supreme Leader, is underway.

The need arises from the dramatic rising popularity of the Black and White Shirts’ national organisation’s own ‘Dear Leader’. The Supreme Leader has decided to purge it’s cleverly manipulated ally which has been the catalyst in the current counter revolution street occupation distraction strategy.

Recent images of the Black and White Shirts Dear Leader openly showing emotion and gaining national recognition and empathy have disturbed, thus threatening, the Supreme Leader who, is not at all ill, and subsequently has no intention of abdication.

With the ultimate goal of a single entity apparently secured, the vexed issue appears to be leadership. The pivotal position is zealously guarded by the Supreme Leader who has a no tolerance policy on rival bids, whether they are tangible or not.

Unknown to the common people the ‘One Club – One Administration Model’ has evolved through informal cross pollination of self gratifying ideas from the Supreme Leader and the Dear Leader. Both, however, have differing views of ultimate individual control.

Based on the extremely popular and lucrative ancient stadium blockbuster event ‘The Lions and the Christians’ the Supreme Leader wishes to reside over a single, ferocious, unbeatable team backed by the totalitarian system that will only play weakened oppressed  teams in great coliseums throughout the land, and ultimately beyond.

In the initial model the seats were always full, the concessionaires all made money, there was always a result and nobody dared speak out for fear of becoming the next weak team to be consumed in the stadium of extinction.

Although agreeing in principle to the concept the Dear Leader has an alternate leadership model. He wants to be the thumbs up, or down, deity. But two into one won’t go.

Apparently ruthlessly aware of threat the Supreme Leader has mobilised his mole, a maverick Field-Marshall sent north twelve months ago, to initially destabilise the morale of the Black and White Shirts through a highly financed, and geared, campaign of doubt to commence the Black and White Shirts’ ‘Swan Song’. This strategy was recently implemented with great effect when another popular front leader, Frank, caused a bit of an uprising in a neighbouring satellite State.

The year long whispering process of the impending exile of the movement’s Messiah had the effect of neutralising the power base of the ‘Feline Front’ hence allowing the eventual Black and White Shirts rise and break out into anarchy that is the shroud behind which the Supreme Leader executes his current play for perpetual power.

To quote a highly regarded football academic and philosopher;

Be afraid, be very afraid.


  1. Dave Nadel says

    I don’t know what you’ve been having for dinner, Phantom, but I suggest that you change your diet so that you cease having these fearsome nightmares.

  2. Phantom – Cheese…………….that’s what gives one nightmares…………apparently.

  3. Dave Latham says

    Dave, I think Phnatom is living his nightmare right now. Happens to coincide with the Collingwood premiership tyranny dynasty unfolding.

  4. Dave Latham says

    Dave, I think Phnatom is living his nightmare right now. Happens to coincide with the Collingwood premiership tyranny dynasty unfolding.

    * Stupid non edit option.

  5. If Sheeds and the ‘Supreme Leader’ get their way it may just be unravelling.

  6. tunes voice and begins singing the Marseillaise. ;)

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