The 2017 Bert Bell Cup – Round Twelve

Greetings Tipsters


How many times have you read the words ‘upset’, ‘unpredictable’ or ‘my tipping is terrible’ these last few days?


Superfluous, the lot.  It’s been dead obvious for weeks that this is the dream season of the draft & salary cap era, on any given day, anyone can win.


Gold Coast beating Hawthorn at the MCG?  That’s hardly an upset.  Carlton beating GWS at the Terrordome?  Not unlikely, second vs second-last has never been so evenly balanced, a close one was expected.


Maybe that is the loss the Monaros had to have, eh?  They’ll head off on some team-bonding trip next weekend, running up and down mountains and chewing through tree branches, Heath Shaw goes Lord Of The Flies and there is a brutal lack of photographic evidence but they win every match for the rest of the season by 30 goals to 4, all oppo players appear to be very, very wary.


Essendon beat Port, as expected.  What’s the big deal about Port?  They’re not all that good, got a good percentage cos they whipped up on a coupla shitty teams at their shittiest, but haven’t been fantastic.


Yeah, might as well whip on the Wiggles.  Or anyone.  Brisbane are the only team more than two wins outa the Eight.  What are the odds on a Swans flag, by the little night stars, it ain’t all that unlikely.


Geelong are the only team, this week, who look like a Contender.  They’ve been to the mountaintop a few times, the recent finals record of the rest of the Eight aint great, Dogs aside and that’s a team that’s just a’stumbling along, as have I thru the streets of Footscray.


Everything has fallen neatly into place, the powers have collapsed, the up&comers have feet of clay, the benighted have a spine.  There has never been a more even first half of a season, has there been a better one?  What marvels might we witness in the second half?


Cheers Tipsters


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Brought to you with the assistance of Seems Twice ‘Non-plussed’ EP.

About Earl O'Neill

Freelance gardener, I've thousands of books, thousands of records, one fast motorcycle and one gorgeous smart funny sexy woman. Life's pretty darn neat.


  1. Earl O'Neill says

    That really ought be Round Thirteen.

  2. The editor had unclicked the box for allowing comments on your piece Earl. Should never have hired that Trump bloke.
    All sorted now. I am enjoying a lot of the matches this season. Helped by disengaging emotionally from my Eagles. We are playing the kids tonight, without having officially announced that we are “playing the kids”. Nothing ventured. Nothing gained. Our best 8 are as good as any in the League. Our worst 8 players as bad as any. I fear that 2015 was a false dawn. Only a fit Nic Nat could save us, which is a big ask for a big man with such a physical game style after a knee operation. Will continue to light my daily prayer candle.
    Footy is the winner. If your Monaros can get something out of their big forwards you are certs. Cameron, Lobb and Patton continue to tease to deceive. Bombers are v.good at their best. The answer is a pineapple pizza with the lot. Regards to all at TD Productions.

  3. Round 12? Round 13? Is this a preview or a review? Have tried speaking to that Trump kid about better sub-editing. Won’t talk to me. Claims “executive privilege”. The work experience kids are uppity these days. Cheers.

  4. Earl O'Neill says

    Is that the Peter B Trump goon? He tried for an internship here, we sent him packing, quick smart.

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