Round 4 – Collingwood v West Coast (Floreat Pica Society)

 

 

Collingwood v West Coast

4:35PM, Saturday April 9

Docklands

 

 

 

by Jim Kesselschmidt

 

Preamble:

 

Like a lot of people in Australia I’m triple vaccinated (was by mid-November 2021). In January this year I copped the virus but only mildly. However, the long-term effects can’t be underestimated. I wake up in fevers and sweats, experiencing delusions and hallucinations that Carlton have won their first three matches and were atop of the AFL ladder. I need urgent treatment for this debilitating and painful condition.

 

This week I bought new lights for my bicycle (having lost them last week at the ‘G) and decided to ride to the Docklands stadium. It’s a bit of trouble to do as I pack a change of clothes, a pair of runners and the lock which weighs quite a bit. When getting into the ground you lock the bike, take off the lights, take the water bottle, lock the helmet to the bike which is then locked to the stand (on this occasion outside Gate 5). (You also hope your bike is still there post-match)

 

Once inside the only place to change are toilets designated for people with a disability which ridiculously also serves as a baby change area. It’s a lottery. You need to find where they are located, hope they are not engaged, hope they are relatively clean, and hope you are not stopping a disabled person or a person needing to change a baby from use of the so-called facility (well change their nappy or clothes not the actual baby). You also don’t want a Seinfeld incident.

 

At the MCG and being a legends member over a good few years, I’ve got things sorted; I know where to go. This was the first time I tried riding to the footy at the Docklands from home in South Caulfield. Got to the stadium 40 minutes before the first bounce. After two attempts I managed to find a relatively clean toilet/baby change area. This time I had my bike lights and all was seemingly good but discovered in the change room/toilet/baby change area that I forgot to pack a shirt (so had to wear by bike jersey which was last years’ 2021 Great Ocean Road Classic jersey with lots of blue and yellow that is, West Coast colours) – not a good start.

 

The footy:

Let’s face it Collingwood is not currently a very good football side who had some decent players out are playing a relatively young and inexperienced group and have a new game style with a new coach and coaching team.

 

In Round 1 Collingwood beat a depleted St Kilda side. In Round 2 the Pies did well against Adelaide who like Collingwood are not going to be featuring in the finals in 2022. In Round 3 we played brilliantly for parts of the match but did not capitalize on our forward entries and shots on goal then ran out of puff in the last quarter. Collingwood’s inefficiency cost us last week and indeed cost us this week. As I commented previously Grundy did not take a solitary mark v Geelong and had only taken four in his first three matches. He also gave away four frees, made eight critical errors and eight clangers.

 

During the week Darcy Moore (not unlike Grundy a couple of years ago) signed a multi-year contract. Darcy in my view has not in 2022 reached the heights he has previously. Indeed, he’s been too loose and poor on too many occasions. Does he need Howe and Roughhead to allow him to play so loose? That is, do the other two know how to cover for him when he attacks the ball. For two smart fellas Grundy and Moore can make some stupid and at times costly mistakes.

 

 

The match

First quarter:

 

The first quarter saw the McCrae method on show except it was being executed by the WCE. Run, carry, play on were being done well but not by Collingwood. At one time I couldn’t believe what I was seeing: Grundy took two contested marks. However, the goose quickly undid his first contested mark by kicking it up into the forward 50 straight to an intercepting McGovern. Insanity it is said, is doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results. Collingwood kept on doing the same thing in the first quarter (and more) where McGovern and Barrass intercepted at will. (There’s something not quite right when I write or say the name Barrass – it’s missing the letter i)

 

Collingwood also did not take its opportunities. Pendlebury was given a 50-metre penalty (as Tony Leonard mentioned on radio for the generous measure of 50 metres ’50 for the penalty and an additional 10 for stupidity’ – referring to the actions of the WCE player) Pendlebury missed. Rioli along with Ryan and a few others took the game on with their exquisite skills, pace and flair. Earlier Mihocek marked near the behind post and as is his wont from that angle, as well as being entirely predictable, Mihocek kicked it out on the full.

 

When Collingwood did take the game on and kicked it low Collingwood were effective. This was evident when Crisp got onto his left and passed it beautifully to a leading Henry who kicked truly.

 

Scores:

WCE: 2.2.14
Pies: 1.2.8

 

Second quarter:

 

WCE kicked the last goal of the first quarter then kicked the first of the second quarter extending their lead.

 

A good passage of play led to Cameron having a relatively easy shot for goal. Cameron was kicking to the Northern end of the stadium. He took a taxi to St Kilda, bought a coffee, had a smoke then started his run up. As sure as an election was going to be called on Sunday, as sure as Trump lost an election and as sure as Clive Palmer is not a medical or scientific expert Cameron missed (a sitter).

 

However, this was followed with two majors, the first of which was a terrific pressure snap by Josh Daicos. While a sitters were missed Josh Daicos kicked a goal which was under considerable pressure that made the faithful think his father Peter. Our forward 50 entries were easily repelled. WCE worked harder and blocked off avenues to goal.

 

There were some positives though. Grundy looked good amassing stats for tackling and hit outs but was he effective? I don’t think he was (see below for comparative stats)

 

What was heartening to see was the wonderful contribution by the brothers Daicos. Josh has really matured and is in sublime form while his bother Nick is an unbelievable talent. Nick has grace, poise and a footy maturity well beyond his chronological years would suggest. This is all the more impressive given that Daicos was unable to play much football over the covid years.

 

Maynard and the ever impressive and reliable Quaynor stood out in the first half. Madgen who unfairly in my view has been a whipping boy for too many pies supporters stuck to his task & did his job well.

 

Tom Wilson did very well and kicked a great goal (which he nearly fluffed) but loomed athletic and also poised. Wilson deserved his call up after some great games in the VFL and looked to me like he fits. He like some of the young kids could do with some steroids. Needs to bulk up. Wilson in my view is a fine pick up and his transition from basketball is pleasing with his potential beginning to be being realised.

 

Collingwood kicked five goals to WCE four.

 

Scores:

WCE: 7.2.44, Pies: 6.6.42

 

 

Third quarter

 

The second half like last week and throughout today was marked by inefficiency and failing to capitalise on some fine work. The Daicos brothers were playing great games as was Maynard and Sidebottom.

 

In the third quarter Collingwood looked like it started to hit its straps (an oft used expression so I thought I’d look up the derivation. From a google search The Free Online Dictionary):

 

The expression, which is used mainly in sporting contexts, originated in Australian English. It may have originated in the idea looking for the straps of one’s swag pack, interpreted metaphorically as seeking a new job. Funny my thoughts were straps in horse racing but who knows. I digress…

 

Cameron goaled, Ginnivan goaled, and Maynard capped off some fine work for a great goal after a handball received. However, while the pies entered the forward 50 33% more than WCE they wasted the ball.

 

Better players included Maynard, Brothers Daicos, Crisp, Pendlebury, Madgen and Sidebottom.

 

Score:

 

Pies 9.10.64
WCE: 9.3.57

 

 

The final quarter was a disaster for Collingwood

 

Collingwood were wasteful and inefficient. From 12 shots on goal ‘we’ kicked one goal and four behinds with an overall kicking efficiency of 40%. At the same time Collingwood got smashed in the clearances allowing Collingwood again to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

 

 

Final scores:

10.14.74
14.3. 87

 

 

Analysis:

‘Bad kicking (or possessions) is bad football’ was a common football refrain when I was young. This truism still holds true (and hurts).

 

Collingwood were inefficient in large parts of play and this was reflected in kicking for goal:

WCE had five players who had 100% accuracy for goal, Collingwood had one
WCE had one player at 66.7% accuracy, Collingwood didn’t have any
WCE had one player with 50% accuracy, Collingwood had five
WCE did not have any players with less than 50% accuracy for goal, Collingwood had two

 

What the stats don’t show included five goals between Josh Kennedy and the vaccinated Jack Darling (both at 100% accuracy compared with Jack Mihocek at 40% and Darcy Cameron at 50% with three goals between them).

 

Quite incredibly overall disposal efficiency was comparable between both teams with Collingwood at 74.1 and WCE at a similar number.

However, what stands out is the poor disposal efficiency of two Collingwood players: Brodie Grundy at 47.4% and Callum Brown at 57.9%. It is simply unacceptable and far below expected standards in AFL for these numbers. While we know it can be true for Brown who is a very good VFL player sadly he’s not up to AFL standard I was a bit gobsmacked when I learned it was Grundy. I put my hand up and admit he is my whipping boy but I wasn’t expecting this. They both get the ball but let themselves and Collingwood down by poor execution.

 

Grundy had 19 disposals at 47.4% efficiency
Natanui had 16 disposals at 56.3% efficiency
Grundy had four clearances while
Natanui had seven clearances
Grundy had a match high eight clangers.

 

Watching the match, I thought Natanui’s clearances were also more damaging for WCE than Grundy’s were for Collingwood. To be fair Grundy played better this week than he had last week where in my view he was poor. However, when he does play better he lets himself down. I want a ruck who is damaging – we have a ruck rover who at times is self-harming (maybe I wasn’t being that fair).

 

Playing interstate can galvanize a team it has for Collingwood before when doing so. Collingwood’s wastefulness and inefficiency cost Collingwood the chance to win. To rub it in WCE kicked a remarkable 14.3.

 

Positives:

Daicos brothers
Maynard
Quaynor
Ginnivan
Sidebottom
Wilson
Pendlebury
Madgen
The VFL
The brisket roll with coleslaw
My bike was still there in one piece

 

Negatives

Elliot’s injury
Collingwood’s inefficiency including poor goal kicking
Callum Brown’s disposals
Grundy’s errors
Moore’s looseness (where the zone defence exacerbates a pre-existing tendency) he likes play off his man to use his strengths to attack the footy at the same time this affords a decent forward to be relatively unchecked and results in goals and turnovers. As noted earlier will Roughead pick up the slack to cover for Moore when he does play to his strengths?
Henry and McInnes had lesser games this week but this was certainly due in large part by the way the footy entered the forward 50.
Mihocek’s goal kicking accuracy
Darcy Cameron – need Mason Cox back and or Kreuger.
The exorbitant cost of the brisket roll with coleslaw

 

 

The biggest negative of all

 

On the way out I needed to find a change room to change into my bike clobber. Went to a disabled toilet/baby change room and it as occupied. A man & his young son were queuing so I went to another one. A young man was waiting outside so I asked him “Do you come here often?” he advised me he was waiting for his wife & she was inside expressing milk as they had a six-month-old son and that was the only place they could find. Being a recent and proud grandfather of a three-month-oldgrandson we had a bit of a natter as you do outside a toilet about babies, feeding, sleeping and changerooms. The young couple had a night out while their grandson was with his grandparents. When the young woman came out of the toilet for disabled people she was in some distress as the changeroom was dirty; others having urinated on the floor and was frankly shocking, I really felt for her. In this day and age in 2022 with the gazillions that the AFL have a young mum can’t have a bit of decent clean space. Sorry but that really pissed me off.

 

 

The ride home:

I’m pleased to say it was a fun and a cathartic ride home. The city was alive with lots of people for the Grand Prix.

 

 

The Votes:

3. (Nick) Daicos
2. Maynard
1. (Josh) Daicos

 

 

 

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