Round 1 – Geelong v Hawthorn: Cats eat birds

Only five minutes in and already the Cats are ahead by 11 points.

It’s not fair. I am yelling at the top of my lungs but no result. These players don’t seem the same people that won 3 premierships and this year are hopefully going to win the “fourthorn”. Another goal to the Cats. I really think they have a chance at beating us Hawks. What I’m starting to realise is cats eat birds. Cyril, a great tackle. Thanks to him we’re passing down the field. People around me are swearing, shouting moron and other things (it’s not even the second quarter). Cyril misses a mark. It is disappointing considering he won the Norm Smith medal last year. Another point. That’s 3 points this quarter. At quarter time the scores are Cats: 24 Hawthorn: 9.

Every Hawthorn player seems to be falling down. Hopefully they do better this quarter. Once again falling on their faces. Cats just put through another goal. Langford got a mark in front of our goal and wham a goal for the Hawks. FINALLY!!! It’s coming down the wing again but no goal. Some scoundrel from the Cats marked before he got to the goal and guess what? They got another goal. I’m hoping we make a comeback anytime soon. Anytime. OK, I want them to make a comeback now. My wish is granted, we kick a goal. And another. WOW, I didn’t know begging worked. Another goal. I’m blown away by how fast Cats can ruin my fun by scoring another goal. And another. They got the last goal by the umpire giving them a free kick for what seemed like NOTHING! It didn’t look like anything to me on the instant replay. At half time the scores are Cats:67 Hawthorn:37.

DELIBERATE! That was so deliberate. We’re so god damn close to the goal but no goal, not even a point! This umpire seems bad, and the crowd agree. But at least they let us have that goal! The people around me are swearing like mad. Hawks kick a goal and the ball came into the row just before us. Now we’ve got a mark right in front of our goal. And Gunston kicks it. Now they are only 16 points ahead. Another for us, 10 points behind. A point for us, A POINT! And happily a goal as well. One more goal and we’re in front by 3. And a goal it is. Everyone is ecstatic. Hopefully we keep up this lead. At 3 quarter time the score is Cats:70 Hawthorn:72.

The last quarter started off disappointingly. They got a goal. But now we got a goal and we’re in front. This quarter isn’t even worth writing about as a Hawks fan, it is obvious the Cats are going to win. Or is it? These umpires are terrible, the Hawks aren’t up to it. But that goal was AWESOME!!! I’m starting to think coming was a waste of Dad’s money. Remember what I said before cats eat birds and right now they are ripping this bird apart like overcooked broccoli. We’re 18 behind now, I was writing 12 but they kicked another goal while I was writing. This has been a disappointment. I’m hearing the Geelong song play. It is sad but at least we didn’t get thrashed. Not a great start, but it is a long season ahead.

GEELONG     4.0   11.1   11.4   18.8 (116)

HAWTHORN   1.2   5.7   10.12 12.14 (86)



Geelong: Smith 3, Caddy 3, Lang 3, McCarthy 2, Hawkins 2, Motlop, Blicavs, Guthrie, Murdoch

Hawthorn: Puopolo 3, Gunston 3, Langford 2, Breust 2, Burgoyne, Hartung



Geelong: Dangerfield, Blicavs, Guthrie, Caddy, Duncan, Lang, Selwood

Hawthorn: Mitchell, Frawley, Puopolo, Lewis, Gibson, Burgoyne, Hartung

Official crowd: 74,218 at the MCG

About Kaisha Thompson

10 year old Hawks fan from Preston. Plays soccer for the Darebin Falcons. Enjoys dancing, singing and being on stage in musical theatre. Hopes to one day sing the National Anthem at the MCG on GF day.


  1. Got to watch out for those Cats scoundrels, Kaisha

  2. I’d blame Jeff Kennett Kaisha. He’s probably if not said it out loud, at least thought that 4 in a row is in the bag. Remember last time he said the Hawks had the wood on Geelong? 11 losses in a row to the Cats. Here’s hoping for a new curse – whoops did I say that out loud?

  3. Great stuff Kaisha. Your writing is great fun to read and improving all the time. Your team is not.
    As an Eagles fan I look forward to reading your game report next week. (Don’t tell anyone but I think you were pretty good yesterday, and will improve a lot once your young players get some experience and you get your injured players back. Hartung is very good. Schoenmakers is a log.)

  4. Bigfooty bogan says

    Suffer in your jocks Hawks … Ha ha!

  5. It was a good win for Geelong. We needed to beat Hawthorn yesterday. Great report about a top shelf game to watch.

  6. Yikes!

  7. Well written Kaisha, good read and summed up the game very well a disappointment for us mayblooms as they say a week is a long time in football eagles have to travel to ‘our house our rules’ words from 2015 GF banner.

  8. Steve Hodder says

    you write like a one-eyed radio broadcast. I love it! It seems Geelong were focussed on this game a long time out and were a lot hungrier than us, however remember this. If Hawthorn were a mill stone, we would grind slowly but exceedingly fine! We play for September.


  9. Aidan Hammond says

    I know what it feels like Kaisha, being a 10 year old Crows supporter it happens a lot! I thought you stoped writing last year, it’s good to see you writing again!

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