NAB Cup, Round 2: Top last quarter helps get ordinary rice taste out of my mouth

After getting woken up at 8.30am due to some enormous thunder I didn’t do much all day. I had my usual Strawberry Yoplait yoghurt first thing and had a read of the Herald Sun, filled out my papers for work experience then I did some odd chores around the house for mum.

Today I got bored so I went and found the disc to install the new Microsoft office disc so I could finally do a report, Saints V Swans, a game that promised to be a good match, the last couple of matches between these two have been extremely tight games.

Finally after waiting all day what I’ve been waiting for all day has arrived, the footy. I notice as the channel ten commentators go down to talk with Paul Roos and Ross Lyon that both coaches are extremely relaxed.

I’m ready for the game to start when dad walks into the lounge, “ I think we should go out to the pub for tea tonight, it’s been a while don’t ya think?” Dad asks, I reply with a very blunt “ Yeah it’s been a while, but can I stay home and watch the footy ?” Dad looks at me strangely as if to say “ You’d rather stay home and watch footy instead of going out for tea ?” Then he replies with a simple “ No mate we’re going as a family.”

I get to watch a lot of the first quarter waiting for mum to get home, the match starts off with a mark to Riewoldt 45 out but he hooks it and misses. The ball found its way down the forward pocket for the swans, it gets thrown in nice tap down from Seaby straight to Moore for the first major of the match. Jetta pops up shortly after and snaps the ball into the 50 and finds the big bloke Currie, Currie kicks straight and the swans get there second. Ray then gets a 50metre penalty and is only 35 out with no angle and misses the chance for a nine pointer.

Just after that miss I get rushed out the door, we get to the pub 2 minutes later, it’s packed so we end up walking up the street and going to the middle pub. We walk in and there’s only two other people in the bistro, we order, I get the chicken Kiev with chips and salad. Dad and I go to the bar to get our drinks we get a jug of lemon squash, I try and peek at the TV in the pub but I cant figure out the score. I sit back down pour everyone a drink and we sit there and talk about our days. Mum, Dad and my sister all worked so they talked about that, I talked about how I did bugger all but watch TV.

We wait a good 25 minutes for tea to arrive and when it did it was average at best, my Kiev was mounted on some rice that was smothered in butter and it was also well over cooked. The Kiev was nice but was also a bit over cooked, we all ate and after we finished I checked my phone for the time, it was 8.50 !! We had been out for an hour and ten minutes and when we got home I quickly turned the TV on and it was 3 quarter time.

I grab myself another yoghurt this time a French vanilla flavoured one to get the taste of that average rice out of my mouth.

The fourth quarter starts, it starts slowly with a lot of throw ups, then the saints get the ball down the forward line and Milne snaps a nice goal. Then Bevan gets a goal for the swans, Riewoldt takes a nice grab, hands it off to Stanley who goals for the saints. Stanley gets involved again and lays a pearling tackle and the ball spills to Milne for another goal the the tip rat. Jack finds space and runs to 30 and kicks a goal then Milne kicks another, Mcglin gets a free inside 50 and goals. Then Gary Rohan runs into a open goal and the scores are level. Then Armitage takes a mark 20 out on the boundary he snaps and misses saints by 1, the scores stay that way and I was very happy with the result – yet another great match between these two sides.

Final scores:


Jeff’s Bests:3.Milne, 2.Grundy and 1. Bevan.

I’m disappointed I didn’t get to witness the whole match, and what did I miss it for ? Tea out, an average chicken Kiev and some Dreadful rice !

And the matches I’d like to do this month are all friday night matches.

About jeffrey paterson

I'm 15 and I live in a little town called Numurkah. I play footy for Katunga under 17s and i play forward and back. I support the mighty Richmond Tigers and my favourite player is Dustin Martin because he wears my number 36 ;).


  1. Very funny, Jeff.

    Next time go for the steak.

  2. Can’t beat the middle pubs chicken parma.

    Nice report, remember to use capital letters with the players names and to put commas where necessary. Cya at lunch time.

  3. Thanks Gigs, I was tempted to go the steak but was reminded by mum I had it the night before.

    Good on ya Josh thanks for the tips see ya then ;)

  4. Gday thats a delicious piece of writing.
    Real super effort that.

  5. Steve Healy says

    Bit sad guys, commenting at school, although I understand if your internet isnt working Josh.

    Great report Jeff, but I really didn’t like how this article had to mention the word “tea” and herald sun. Mcglin, lol.

    I’m reminded of the Jason Dunstall rice incident by this piece lol

  6. Damian Watson says

    Great article Jeff,

    I haven’t eaten DINNER at the pub for ages, good to see your a fan of the fruit youghurt as well.

    I noticed how the coaches were relaxed beforehand, although it isn’t unusual to see Paul Roos calm over the course of a match.

  7. 4: Gday Greg!!

  8. The rice reminded me of Dean Rice and the chicken of Cale Morton.

    Partially watched games are coming into fashion now.

  9. Steve Healy says

    Not funny u dickhead.

    Did you see Cale Morton’s collision on Saturday? He kept his eyes on the ball the whole time, and took the knock of an 8-10 week knee injury

  10. I think Ben Davies, when he was at Collingwood, had Malthouse get annoyed about his lack of courage at one point. Although Morton’s looked comical on video, he was actually running for the ball, but it’s still funny to joke about it.

    Someone should have inserted the Benny Hill theme tune into the Morton/Lade chase video.

  11. Thanks Guys.
    Haha and thanks to you too Greg !

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