Citrus Bob’s Football Dictionary

With the bastardisation of the English language taking hold it is appropriate that some new words were found in the first week of the final series. Rulebook feel free to use this week.

Blubebaggers (n) – Name of footballers who have played for Carlton and bagged or kicked goals last weekend  viz. Betts (5), Waite (4), Kennedy (3)

Shuey (adj) – a dance performed, usually against three Hawthorn footballers found clutching at straws. To be “shueyed” is a major form of embarrassment.

Walker (v) – A long and beautifully timed kick.  Performed only by a certain tribe of footballer born in Broken Hill. Usually travels 70 metres.  In some areas with a royal background called a “Dickson”.

Betts (n) – to be avoided at all costs.  To get “Betts” does not exist at most AFL Clubs. Also see Bluebaggers

Harvey (v)Another name for a senior citizen who refuses to live in a retirement village. Normally treated with respect by Tigers.

Waite (n) see Bluebaggers

Bontempelli (n) – A long-nosed Bulldog pup who will develop with the right traits. Usually tied with a Stringer.

National Anthem (v) – A song usually performed with gusto by Australians but not those who play AFL football.

Kennedy (n) – see Bluebaggers

Bevo (adj)a term of endearment used by people for an innovative football coach. Not to be confused with Hawthorn imports Halo, Lako, Frawlo, Guno, Burgo, Big Boyo, and Gibo

Danger (n) – an indigenous word used by the Wathaurong tribe meaning Geelong

Gillon (v) – an Australian slang word meaning “brown nosing high flyers”

Sandgroper (n)a word not in favour with the AFL and Victorian newspapers

Jacobs (n)  – a coat worn by Trent Cotchin on Sunday and possibly again this week on number 12.

 

 

Other Footy Almanac stories of Finals Week 1

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About Bob Utber

At 75 years of age, 'Citrus Bob' Utber is doing what he wanted to do as a 14-year old: writing, talking and watching sport. How good is that!?! He lives in Mildura with his wife and 'furry kids'; a labradoodle "Freddy Flintoff" and a groodle named "Chloe on Flinders".

Comments

  1. Love it Citrus. Saw you on the TV lurking around the boundary after the siren. Must have been buzzing down there. Dangerman’s last quarter was quality.

  2. Good stuff, Bob – not sure I like the Danger definition, though. Another suggestion:

    Utber (v) – to linger noticeably in the background at a time of great celebration

  3. Malcolm Ashwood says:

    Thanks Citrus Bob was it you or Colonel Sanders in the rooms half expected to see the crows eating KFC.
    Danger is incredible I will find it hard watching him in a cats jumper

  4. The antidote to a “Betts” is a “Jetts”. Neville beats Eddie every time.

  5. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

  6. Ben Footner says:

    Ha! The Colonel Sanders call went around our lounge room at the end of the game, I had no idea it was ‘Footy Almanacs Own’ Citrus Bob! Classic.

  7. mickey randall says:

    Citrus- most amusing. Enjoyed the Carlton definitions.

    Interesting note on National Anthem (v): there’s only three living Australians (at last count) who can sing the second verse.

  8. Ben Footner says:

    Better make that 4 Mickey cause I know it. God knows why, perhaps because I was in primary school when it came in (mid 80’s?) and had to sing it at assembly.

  9. Outstanding work from you Citrus. If you’re not in the bright colors on Friday night, I’ll be disappointed!

    Mickey, Ben. I can sing the second verse of the Geelong footy club theme song and have no desire whatsoever to learn v2 of Advance Oz Fair. Un-Australian?

  10. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Me too Mickey/Ben

    We give our best
    From coast to coast
    Where the story will be told …

  11. Ben Footner says:

    We’ll fight the rugged battle Swish, and the flag will be our goal! Ha, know that one too.

    Knowing the second verse of your club song makes you more Australian IMO Steve!

  12. Surely the most Australian thing is to mostly hum and then chime in with the occasional word of any second verse: “ever grows (woo, woo)”, “the spirit of old 46, 6, 6”, “all the lands”, “He’s billing the Nazis”

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