Archie Calls the Grand Final Before the First Bounce of the Season – When His Gazza’s Stalking Around the Gee- Arch See’s Red, He Sees Red, He’s Sees Red


(to the Tune of Eric Bogle’s And the Band Played Waltzing Matilda, and inspired by Luke Reynolds)


When Gaz was a young man, he carried the pack,

And he lived the free life of a rover

From the Gabba’s green basin, to Kardinia Park,

Gaz waltzed his brilliance all over.

Then in 2011, the Goldie said son

It’s time to stop to stop rambling, there’re premierships to be won.

And they give him a red jersey, and they made him a Sun,

And he made the sacred pilgramage north.


And the fans sang ‘Gazza you’re brilliant’

As he bagged a goal or three

And amidst all cheers, the flag-waving and beers, Gaz set off for glory at the Gee


How well we’ll remember that September day,

When the Suns put the Hawks to the slaughter

And wonder how in the hell they called this Hawthorn team great,

When they tackle and kick like me daughter.


Jarryd Roughead was waiting, he’d prepared himself well.

He’d mark Gaz one on one, and give the great man hell.

But after just one quarter, he said f**king hell

Gaz’s the best player in Australia.


And the fans sang ‘Gazza you’re brilliant’, as the Suns ran away with the game.

By half he’d kicked four, sucked a quick XXXX beer; the whistle blew and in the 3rd he kicked ten.


The Hawks flooded their defence, they tried hard to survive,

But by three-quarter time, they were starting to tire

And in the last Abbett unleashed, and in 20 minutes he’d kicked five,

There’s no stopping Gaz when the great man’s on fire

Then the final whistle blew, and the ground filled with red,

The Hawks era was over, their premiership reign was dead,

Gazza climbed the rostrum, donned the Norm Smith and said.

“Luke Hodge mate, stop bloody cryin!”


And the fans are singing Gazza is brilliant, all around Metricon and the Gee

And Jarryd Roughead, he humbly said

Gazza’s brilliant, the Sun’s will win three.


Gazza is brilliant

Gazza is brilliant

The best player, you’ll ever see …….



About Archie Butterfly

Archie's decided to follow the dream and try become the next great Aussie bush poet. They all think he's mad. He's out to prove them right!


  1. Peter flynn says

    It took the now mercenary about 65 games before he found his feet.

    Gifted is right!

    His Old Man was way better.

    Not welcome!

  2. Luke Reynolds says

    Great work Archie. Plenty left in the G.Ablett jnr story. Big year for the Suns coming up.

  3. Peter Flynn – you are kiddingyourself.

    Luke Reynolds – you brother Josh the bulldog may be an imbecile, but you sir are spot on.

  4. Steve Hodder says

    Poetically delusional!


  5. Mickey Randall says

    I reckon Collingwood supporter teeth model and Pogue Shane McGowan would do a cracking version of this too.

  6. Rick Kane says

    Ouch Mr Butterfly, ouch (as well as v entertaining and funny).

    I presume this tale is not set in 2015, as the GF will be played in October this year. And from the tenor of your ballad the Mighty Hawks are still the mightiest. Therefore, in your humble estimation the Hawks must complete the three-peat (even more, as the year this tale is set is not clarified). Thank you for the esteem you bestow on Hawthorn, even us mere fans dare not dream that big!

    And, to quote The Castle, tell him he’s dreamin’


  7. David Zampatti says

    The yellow and blue fog that rubs its back upon the window-panes,
    The yellow and blue smoke that rubs its muzzle on the window-panes,
    Licked its tongue into the corners of the evening,
    Lingered upon the pools that stand in drains,
    Let fall upon its back the soot that falls from chimneys,
    Sipped an SSB on Bayview Terrace, made a sudden leap,
    And seeing that it was a soft October Grand Final afternoon,
    (And the Eagles didn’t get within a bull’s roar of the eight)
    Drove the Audi to the house, and fell asleep.

  8. kath presdee says

    Little darling, it’s the start of the long cold Canberra winter
    Little darling, it’s been three years since we beat them here
    Here come the Suns
    No Ablett Suns and I say
    It’s all right.

    Little darling, the Giants have grown in size and stature
    Little darling, it’s been three years, we’ll beat them here
    Here come the Suns
    No Ablett Suns and I say
    It’s all right

    Suns, Suns, Suns here we come
    Suns, Suns, Suns here we come

    Coz we got Sunshine, on ANZAC Day
    It may be cold outside, there’s a game to play
    I guess you’d say, what could make me feel this way
    Go the mighty Giants…

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