Almanac Poetry: ‘No Fear’


No Fear


I’d ringed around the advert, on the envelope a stamp

For I had a secret longing, to join a nudist camp


My resume accepted, an interview took place

For this exclusive colony, of the ageing wrinkled face.


And though it was amusing to pirouette around,

Dropping knickers, bra and gingham frock, upon the bare surrounds.


With hands by my side, they checked out my credentials

And explained to me the dos and don’ts, and other incidentals.


A bona fide nudist now, I couldn’t wait to shed my gear

My complimentary wax and pluck, and mantra of ‘no fear’.


We met up by the seaside, a little secluded spot

I knew that I had made it, by the piles of clothes like dots.


The first rule they had told me, was to focus on the view

Did they mean the far horizon, or someone else’s do?


There were bits and tits and lots of smiles, across the now warm sand

With couples strolling side by side, some even holding hands.


I felt a tad conspicuous, nude and all alone

Until a man I barely knew, came up and said hello.


He suggested to me a dip, a ploy from this bright spark

For in the sea with others, he yelled out “Great White Shark!”


Good grief did we all move, an exodus of jiggle

We newbies in our post haste bounce gave the oldies quite a giggle.


My chaff rash from the sand did mean I sat upon the rocks

Checking out the single blokes my  focus their sunglasses.

For hats and sunnies were allowed, the only creature comfort

My heavy tinted bi-focals cut glare without discomfort.


And it really took no time at all, to put things in perspective

That body shape and proportion, were at best, subjective.


I don’t think I will go next week, though the day was rather charming

The blokes that wandered up and down, with point and shoots alarming!


No, best that I retire my kit, sandcastles for distraction

OR maybe a nudie run between the flags, poetry in motion!



© Sandra Shields



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  1. Colin Ritchie says

    Good on you Sandra, you’re a braver person than me!

  2. Thanks Colin.
    Great weather for it ?

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