Almanac Life: Betty Croker (nee Cashill) – Part 2: Suburban Mum

 

 

 

 

Betty Cashill and Bern Croker were married on 20 September, 1952 at Koroit.  Family lore suggests that Dad met Mum at a dance in Melbourne.  However more recently Mum has said the first meeting was at St Francis Catholic Church in the City when she was in town from Ballarat for a weekend.

 

 

 

Betty came from Koroit in Western Victoria, though at the time was living and working in Ballarat.  Bern was from Port Melbourne and was working for Dunlop at their Montague factory.  After returning from war service, having been in New Guinea for 18 months, he was living with his brother Jack and his family at Preston.

 

Bern travelled regularly to Ballarat to court Betty. He often told us that he was the coldest he had ever been in Ballarat and had to put his newspaper up his jumper to keep the cold out.  He persevered and when they married they moved out to Ringwood East to live.  Bern’s father, Jack snr had moved out to Ringwood from Port Melbourne just after the War with his second wife Anne, so was nearby.

 

Betty and Bern spent the better part of 62 years together and raised their family at their Eastfield Road house. The house was secured with a war service loan.

 

When they first came to Ringwood East their house was one of only a few dotted up Eastfield Road on what had been an apple orchard.  It was a two bedroom weatherboard, with a combustion stove, open fire in the lounge room, an outside dunny, a copper for clothes washing, an ice chest to keep food cool and a valve radio for entertainment. There was an open verandah out back adjacent to the laundry.

 

Bern continued to travel by train in to Montague for work for several years until he secured a move to Dunlop’s Bayswater factory, where he worked as a cost clerk until he retired at 60, after 44 years of service to the company.

 

Betty had left her work at Coles in Ballarat with a reference to work elsewhere for the company.  However, as was pretty common at the time once married she took up duties as an at home suburban housewife.

 

At this time Ringwood East was still a developing town. There were the basics in the Railway Avenue shopping strip, including a butcher, milk bar, grocer and hardware. There was another smaller shopping strip over on Old Lilydale Road which had a green grocer.  Betty would ride her bike or walk over to do her shopping.  Any clothes shopping or other significant purchases were mostly made on occasional visits in to the City.  At that time Ringwood was very much an outer eastern suburb with no freeways to come for several decades. It took about an hour on the train to go in to the City.

 

In January 1954 the first of three boys, Anthony arrived.  Mum recalls wheeling him down to the train line in the pram when he was only a few months old to watch the Queen go by in the train on her first visit here.  Soon Martin arrived in December, 1955 and Keiran followed in September 1957.

 

Beyond the immediate family, Betty and Bern’s life revolved around the local church and primary school, St Francis de Sales, as it did for numerous young families who had moved in to the area.  Volunteer tasks included converting the school in to a church on a Friday night and back again after Sunday services, counting collections and for Betty attending tuck shop duties during the week.

 

Betty’s Dad, Martin died suddenly from a heart attack in August 1958, aged 72.  He had been a fit and active man on his small farm so it was a great shock to the family.

 

Growing up we spent every holiday down at Koroit at our Grandma’s. Here we met up with our uncles and aunties and an ever growing mob of cousins. These cousins spanned about a 25 year period and soon enough another generation of second cousins started to arrive.  Fond memories remain of our times hanging out with Mum’s extended family.

 

Dad had only learnt to drive at 38 years of age, as there was no great need living in inner Melbourne where public transport was good.  Mum never learnt to drive.  As toddlers we would tag along with Mum on walking trips to Ringwood a few miles away for shopping.  When some significant car repairs were needed, it was decided to do without a car so that an additional bedroom could be added.

 

Over time the back verandah had been enclosed, then an indoor toilet was added when the sewer was connected in the area.  Wood and briquette were replaced by gas appliances and of course we got a television like nearly all families.

 

Mum was a decent cook though was not really extended as Dad’s tastes and preferences were limited. Over time pasta and rice dishes were added on to the basic soup, meat and veg fare.  Home-made cakes, slices and pasties were a regular offering.  Mum was never a fan of pre-made or processed foods. Other than visits from extended family and occasionally hosting one of the local priests for dinner, we rarely entertained visitors.

 

Beyond the regular home duties Mum was a reader of newspapers and magazines and a writer of letters to her Mum and sisters, Joyce and Sheila. She was never much of a TV watcher beyond the news or some variety type shows.  The radio was usually on during the day on one of the commercial news and music stations, playing the tunes of the day.  For many years the house did not have a telephone connected. Important calls were made using a paid telephone booth a few blocks away.

 

When we all moved in to secondary school at Aquinas College in Ringwood, Mum became involved with volunteer school duties and later when Maroondah Hospital opened in the area, she volunteered in their kiosk.  As she did not drive she got around by walking, bus or train or the occasional lift from a friend.

 

 

 

Mum was not a big follower of sport though when we were young we were taken to the MCG for footy.  When we got older and had our first cars we would take Mum and Dad with us to games at VFL Park at Waverley. Dad dropped off on going when his eyesight deteriorated, though I recall Mum continued to come for a number of years beyond Dad.

 

Through our parents perseverance and support and the good fortune of being educated in the Whitlam era, we received a good education from the Christian Brothers then went on to University to become respectively a doctor, mechanical engineer and civil engineer.

 

Dad retired in 1982.  Within a year our Grandmother (Mum’s mother) and our Grandfather (Dad’s father) died having both lived in to their nineties. So in retirement, with all of us working Mum and Dad took the opportunity to travel around Victoria and Australia.  Favourite places were Merimbula and Mildura.  Other trips included Tasmania, Kangaroo Island and Central Australia.  They had one big trip overseas to Ireland with a Church group.  As Keiran was working in London at the time, they took the opportunity to stay on for a few weeks tour around England.

 

In the mid 1980s the first grandchildren arrived.  From the early 1990s however Betty lost three of her brothers to illness within a few years.

 

 

 

 

Betty and Bern remained active and always interested in our lives. Dad was an avid walker.  Mum was happy enough to do tasks for us if asked.  Neither offered gratuitous or unsolicited advice.

 

Betty’s two older sisters died within a short period in the mid 2000s, which was a great blow to her. When Les passed at age 95, she was the sole remaining of her large family.

 

Betty and Bern’s time together came to an end when Dad passed away in August 2014 after a few years of progressing dementia.  Mum cared for him at home until the last few months.  And she remaining steadfastly at home until about a year ago when declining mobility necessitated a move in to aged care.

 

Mum is a kind person who is interested in people without being overbearing.  She still remains a font of information on our extended family and of families back home in Koroit or around Ringwood East. She retains many great stories from her youth and beyond.

 

 

 

Mum and Dad were always there for all three of us; a constant. On this Saturday 29^th April she reaches the grand age of 100.  Simply, congratulations on a good life and thank you.

 

Love from your boys and partners; Tony & Jenny, Martin & Deb and Keiran; grandchildren and partners; Nick & Samantha, Mat & Belinda, James and Alex; step granddaughters Kate and Edan, and great grandchildren George, Neve, Quinn, Sophie, Jude and Harper.

 

 

Part 1 about Keiran’s mum can be read Here.

 

 

More stories by Keiran Croker can be read Here.

 

 

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