The universal truth of Australian Rules Football is no matter which club you barrack for, there are three certainties in life—death, taxes, and a deep, simmering distrust which borders on the theatrical hatred of the Geelong Football Club. I have learnt in recent times that the hatred of Geelong is as palpable and universal as the disdain most footy fans have of Collingwood.
But why is this so? I have done some research particularly in light of Hawthorn’s thrilling one point victory on Easter Monday. The football world rejoiced as one.
I will attempt to unpack this entirely reasonable, completely unbiased, and in no way exaggerated sentiment. Let’s start with the Hawthorn-Geelong rivalry beyond Kennett’s curse. We will call it the Hawthorn blood feud – 1963 to eternity.
The dislike begins, as all great grudges do, with history and violence. The 1963 VFL Grand Final lit the fuse – albeit a faint one. Not even Hawthorn’s John Peck could incite an all-in brawl that day as the Hawks succumbed to a 49-point defeat. Freddy Wooller booted three goals, with the dynamic duo of Farmer and Goggin among the Cats best. The Hawks failed to score a major in the last quarter. Peter Lyon warmed the bench that day for the Kennedy-coached Hawks. Soon after, Pete trotted off to Tassie the birthplace of former Demon skipper and now $1m media mega-star Garry.
It was the gladiatorial chaos of the 1989 VFL Grand Final that turned today’s Hawthorn/Geelong rivalry into a full-blown Shakespearean tragedy.
At the centre of this epic was, of course, Dermott Brereton and Mark Yeates courtesy of the opening centre bounce that looked less like football and more like a WWE audition. The famous incident was a result of some earlier deeds throughout the course of the ’89 season and erupted in a pre-determined tactic designed to take out the Hawthorn champ. It nearly worked in what has become regarded as one of the greatest Grand Finals of all time. Carnage was the day’s creed with players from both sides pummelled into near extinction. Dipper, with a lung expiring of all oxygen and other internal organs shattered by an oncoming train in the form of Garry Ablett, was to spend over a week in hospital recovering. The Hawks hung on in a thriller.
To Hawthorn fans, Geelong are violent opportunists. To Geelong fans, Hawthorn are sanctimonious historians. To everyone else, it’s just deeply entertaining hatred passed down through generations like a cursed family heirloom.
But let’s look at some other compelling factors that incense opposition fans. Kardinia Park, Shell Stadium, Baytec Stadium, Simonds Stadium, Skilled Stadium and now GMHA Stadium is the Fort Knox of government funding. Brian Cook did a wonderful job in government relations in his time at the Cattery.
Kardinia Park is a footy ground so frequently upgraded it’s rumoured to have its own line item in the federal budget.
Opposition fans are convinced that every new stand is funded by taxpayers who just wanted the public toilets replaced. The joint has received more handouts than a Centrelink queue on payday. How much did Cooky secure from the government for the new scoreboard? And yet, somehow, Geelong still insists it’s not quite finished. One more upgrade.
Despite being widely regarded by everyone outside of Geelong as being windswept by south-easterlies off Jan Juc, painfully narrow and architecturally confusing Geelong still believes Kardinia Park should host AFL finals. Oh, please, that would be like taking the Grand Final to Norwood Oval, arguably the worst ground to host an AFL match in history! If you’re unsure watch this weekend’s Gather Round.
Nothing warms rival fans’ hearts like watching generational talent magically fall into Geelong’s lap via the AFL’s most wholesome loophole: the father-son rule. Enter Tom Hawkins, Gary Ablett Jr and Matthew Scarlett. To Geelong supporters, this is tradition. To everyone else, it’s daylight robbery with a nostalgic backstory.
The Cats and their supporters, most of whom come from the western district area of Victoria, suffer from what can only be described as an entitlement epidemic. Geelong fans don’t just expect to win, they expect the football universe to align accordingly. Lose a game? The umpires cost us. Win a game? Obviously, justice prevailed. Finish top four? As is their birthright. Finish outside the top four? A scandal.
They always feel ‘hard done by’, even when sitting comfortably on top of the ladder.
And what about Bailey Smith, a man whose mere existence seems to provoke opposition fans into near insanity? The boy can play. Keeps getting the ball. But. The hair. The headband. The confidence. The vibe. The Instagram. It’s not even what he does, it’s how enthusiastically and arrogantly he does it. Like he knows you’re annoyed and is revelling in it.
There exists a long-standing conspiracy theory whispered around town and shouted on Melbourne talkback radio that Geelong has been ‘creatively interpreting’ the salary cap for years. The master Brian Cook at work again. Perhaps. Perhaps not.
Nothing proven, of course. But suspiciously, stars arrive, stars stay and everyone seems oddly happy with their ‘modest’ contracts. Pure coincidence. Absolutely. Keeps the playing group together. They want to win Premierships. We will all take less to win a Premiership.
And just how did Geelong land Patrick Dangerfield and Jeremy Cameron? According to rival fans, it was as simple as agricultural incentives. Just check out Jeremy’s Instagram page. Not contracts. Not lifestyle. Just the quiet promise of a charming rural property and a tractor!
Even after winning multiple flags, Geelong supporters still speak about the 2008 AFL Grand Final versus the Hawks like it was a miscarriage of justice on par with a royal family scandal. Luke Hodge blitzed them.
“We should have won,” they cried. Let’s face it, Geelong’s Grand Final record is emotionally confusing; 1994 AFL Grand Final a disaster to the tune of 80 points, 1995 AFL Grand Final a disaster to the tune of 61 points, 2009 AFL Grand Final victors over St Kilda by 12 points apparently won via an umpiring conspiracy and the feats of Paul Chapman. What about the 2025 AFL Grand Final where scores were level at half-time but the Cats, with Jeremy minus an arm, capitulated to the tune of 47 points handing the Lions back-to-back Premierships.
If Geelong is the empire, then Chris Scott is its calmly spoken, slightly exasperated emperor forever explaining to the rest of us why we’ve misunderstood everything. He is the modern-day Caligula. I once asked my most respected person in footy, Neil Blame, why Geelong selected Chris Scott as its coach way back when. “His emotional intelligence,” was the response I was given. Fair enough.
We have learnt over time that, according to Scott, the rules are fine but also flawed and interpreted incorrectly. His team is both unfairly treated and any loss is ‘a learning experience’ or was part of the overall plan to manage the playing group in readiness for the inevitable final’s appearance. Any win is ‘probably what we expected’.
Chris doesn’t argue, he simply clarifies – in the same tone a university lecturer uses when correcting a first-year Arts student. Watch last Monday’s post-match interview with Gerard Whately and Garry Lyon and you will know what I mean.
No Chris Scott press conference is complete without a reverent nod to Leigh Matthews, as was the case again on Monday night. At this point, Matthews isn’t just a former coach or legend, he is the game itself!
You’ll hear Scott agonisingly say, “Leigh always said…” “I remember Leigh mentioning…” “It goes back to something Leigh believed in…”
The most remarkable trait of Chris Scott is not that he’s confident, it’s that he exists in a permanent state of being technically correct when he is totally wrong. His comments regarding the Wildcard Games as a cash grab by the AFL are spot on! Or was he caught off guard due to his emotional instability post-game? Even he admitted to being vulnerable coming off the roller coaster of a one-point loss.
So, when rival fans list their many, many reasons for their hatred of the Geelong Football Club, they inevitably land on Chris Scott the coach who never overreacts, never under-explains and never, ever appears to think he might be wrong.
In summary, my research into opposition hatred of the Cats isn’t just about success.
It’s about historical grudges, perceived advantages, a touch of smugness and the unsettling feeling they’ll still be good when your club isn’t. The Cats are perennially successful, well-run, slightly smug, and perpetually relevant.
Which, in football terms, is infuriating and completely unforgivable!
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I enjoyed this, Richard. ‘Tongue in cheek’ is a great genre because there’s always a little bit more there than meets the facetious eye.
Nothing ‘apparently’ about that umpiring in 2009. The Zapruder footage is clear on how many guernsey pulls went unpunished. Heard whispers of CFMEU involvement on the day and those whispers aren’t getting any quieter.
It was equally bad on Monday which caused me to support – and I can’t believe I’m saying this – caused me to support Hawthorn. Hawthorn! For that, I will never forgive Geelong.
Not sure Richard if you have deliberately omitted this, or forgotten, but your article fails to mention when in
1985, Leigh Mathews infamously hit Neville Bruns who suffered a compound fracture of his jaw and had to have it wired up. Mathews was subsequently deregisterwd as a player and charged with assault by the Victorian Poliice.
So?
Patrick, my “barracking” of Hawthorn was actually the reverse of your situation.
When former St Kilda coach Allan Jeans and former St Kilda player Russell Greene went to Hawthorn, I started barracking for Hawthorn, as St Kilda were getting worse on the field and winning more wooden spoons. Of course, it also helped that there was a team to stop Collingwood, Carlton, Richmond and Essendon, back then, from winning so many more premierships.
Then Hawthorn became too good, so I leaned more to Geelong against Hawthorn after 2008. It’s like Federer becoming too good in the tennis, so I started barracking for Nadal. Hawthorn have now became the Djokovic of AFL football. You wanted them to be the spoiler, but didn’t realise how successful they would become, with their phenomenal strike rate in winning premierships. Hawthorn then became the more despised out of the two clubs, because they benefited from St Kilda losing the Mornington Peninsula zone in 1967. Both teams deprived St Kilda of winning flags in 1971 and 2009, two years which St Kilda should have really won the premiership.
What’s good for football is that teams that have less premierships than other teams, start winning premierships themselves. This seems to have happened more in the 21st century, but Patrick and I are still waiting for our team, St Kilda, to break their 60 year premiership drought.
For me, I don’t despise Geelong. I admire what they’ve achieved after breaking their 44 year premiership drought, but it’s time for teams like St Kilda, as well as more interstate clubs, to start winning premierships more regularly. It’s all about winning premierships and what the Brisbane Lions have achieved in the last few years, is good for football.
Otherwise, Richard, everything’s OK with Geelong!
I do think you have a point Richard. The Cats are despised. At the Tanunda Club the old-timers make polite, and awkward, conversation with me about the Cats, but you can see it in their eyes.
Some are more open.
Walking into Rockford yesterday, I was greeted by a courtyard filled with Ben the Winemaker whistling ‘We’re a happy team at Hawthorn’. And he’s a good whistler.
There was more to 1985. First, Geelong forward mark Jacko Jackson was bored and out of form, so he decided to hit various Hawthorn people, starting the all-in brawl, which led to the Matthews/Bruns incident.
Worse was to come, Geelong coach Hafey and Hawthorn coach Alan Jeans fronted up on “World of Sport” the following day to explain themselves. The inquisition was led by gentle Peter McKenna. Pete:
“Tommy, why didn’t you take Jackson off?”
Hafey had no real answer. Then gentle Pete asked a question of Alan Jeans, who went all Trump on him, which I thought was a bit unfair.
1985 was a miserable year for Geelong, who missed the finals, Hafey, who was sacked by Geelong, Hawthorn, who had a miserable grand final, Mathews, who retired and went off to coach Collingwood (yay!) and Jackson, who was sacked by incoming coach John Devine and never played again.
Worth noting that Geelong lost all the milestones to Hawthorn during this era – the 1985 brawl game, the 1989 grand final, the replay in opening round 1990, the earlier game in 1989 where Hawthorn made the big comeback, the 1991 second semi and of course the 2008 grand final. It was not until the 2011 qualifying final that the Moggies finally beat the Hawks in a final. It must have set off a mountain of resentment to this very day.
I didn’t know the Cats are despised!! I love Geelong. Play the game the way it should be played.
I always laugh at the home ground grudge. While Melbourne based teams all sold their souls to the devil (AFL) for 100 pieces of silver, Geelong didn’t and hung on to their spiritual home. Now all the Melbourne teams have is a weird argument about the ground’s shape. Since when has that been designated? Learn to play on all types of grounds you fools!
On we go. Go Cats
I wasn’t aware that the Cats are deposed either, Richard – in fact, I feel that many would consider them their ‘second team’. Aside from that, I did enjoy your well put together piece.
Line 1, immediately above … despised – not deposed, Richard!
Well said, Richard.
I dare say that you have spoken for the silent majority
Perhaps the Cats are despised by a silent majority including the curse man.
They are entitled to their feral views.
A more positive view is that their is a great rivalry between the Cats and the number ones and
twos.
In 1976, on the banks of the Ovens river at Porepunkah, my family and me enjoyed a leisurely afternoon
with the Hawthorn football club coach and his wife. Contrary to your theme Richard, there was only
mutual respect and bonhomie.
The Cats are despised. No, no I won’t have that. There’s a team called Collingwood!