You couldn’t script this…

I was feeling bad for Richmond, having a game stolen by two misfortunes at the death: the play on call, and then the play on. At least they got two points. Essendon walked away with nothing, except…except…nah, nothing.


The bad news for Collingwood is that the stakes have been raised in classic Hollywood style.To win so many games by such a small margin is a sure sign that Hector and his footy gods are scripting a better tragedy still. It is all going to end in tears. Literally. There’s a scene where a distraught eight-year-old looks up to his dad and asks, ‘Are we allowed to change teams?’


It’s obvious to film buffs that the climax will come in the Grand Final when Collingwood gets pinged for a head high tackle on Selwood and then an extra 50m penalty for moving off the mark. Geelong will kick the obligatory after the siren goal to win by a single point. It sounds cliche but the production values are high.


Over the credits, they’ll play fragments of footy commentary. ‘Are you there Harry?’,  and then Mike Williamson uttering his immortal words, ‘I picked this.’  The nightmare ends with Richo on the boundary imparting wisdom for all: ‘It’s called irony, BT.’




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  1. Ah – that’s beautifully scripted! I’m looking forward to it already…

  2. george smith says

    Nah mate, even worse. Ever since the Cardinals changed the rules on grand final replays because of a St Kilda whinge (“we’d a won it in extra time, bounce of ball etc”), I have been waiting for the next grand final draw – and for Collingwood to lose it in extra time!!

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