The Ashes 2021/22 – Third Test, Melbourne Day 3: Boland bowls them out



Boxing Day Test Day 3


Scott Boland, in one of the most astonishing bowling displays ever in a Test match, has demolished the Englanders with 6/7 in just over 1 hour of play. If the English were down before this game, they are now out!


Day 3 should see The Last Rites performed on the hapless Englanders. Would they have done better with The Pope playing?


Came in on 8.35am train from Lilydale and, as usual, I went to the end of the platform at Canterbury to get a seat on the carriage that is nearest the exit at Richmond station.  So did 300 other people!  It is a wonder the train did not go head over turkey.


I do admire our love of sport here in Victoria, it is unparalleled in the world.  Mind you, many of them would have purchased seats anyway but they still came in their droves.


A beautiful day and Australia only need 6 wickets. For England much will depend on the two at the bat, Messrs Root and Stokes, The Pride of The Lions. Let us hope they dig in and make a fight of it.


Stokes starts well hitting two superb fours from Starc, a straight drive and one through the covers. Then a beautiful ball from Starc cuts back and removes his middle stump. No-one could have played it, an absolute ripper. Stokes out for 11 , England 5/46 and Starc 3/25.


If for nothing else, the locals came to see “their boy Scotty” bowl and he didn’t let them down trapping Bairstow (5) LBW. Of course he went DRS. You do desperate things in desperate times.  England 6/60 and “our boy Scotty” 3/5.


At 6/60 I went to find “Swish”, got lost and England are 8/65.


The last hope, Joe Root (28), got a good one from Boland and Warner did the rest.  7/61 and “our boy Scotty” has 4/5.


This is Scotty’s game as Wood (0) hits one back hard at the bowler and he takes a sharp catch.  The way he is going, he could have caught it with his feet.  8/65 and “OUR boy” has 5/6.


How crazy is this game – and it gets WORSE!


Robinson (0) fends at one from OBS (Our Boy Scotty) and is caught by Labuschagne at third slip. England 9/65 and Boland has 6/6.


James Anderson, in his last appearance in Melbourne, scores a single, then Green bowls him and the game is all over. England all out for 67. They have lost their last 5 wickets for 7 runs and Australia win by an innings and 14 runs to retain The Ashes.


Australia 267 defeated England 185 and 67 (Root 28, Boland 6/7, Starc 3/29 & Green 1/8).


How fitting for Scotty Boland to win the Johnny Mullagh trophy. A proud indigenous local, his performance in this game was, in fact, unbelievable. Not since Bob Massie way back in 1972 has a performance been seen like this.


Well, that is it for the Boxing Day Test. How apt a title as England, in the white corner, were pummelled early in the bout and didn’t make it to the championship rounds.  Next we’re off to Sydney.


Now to twiddle my thumbs waiting for my plane home on Friday!!!!!


To read more from ‘Citrus’ Bob Utber click here.


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About Bob Utber

At 80 years of age Citrus Bob is doing what he wanted to do as a 14 year-old living on the farm at Lang Lang. Talking, writing, watching sport. Now into his third book on sports history he lives in Mildura with his very considerate wife (Jenny ) and a groodle named "Chloe On Flinders". How good is that.


  1. Liam Hauser says

    I still reckon, quite simply, the series was virtually decided before a ball was bowled at the Gabba (not to mention the first ball of the series itself!).
    While the omission of Broad and Anderson at the Gabba was downright ludicrous (as well as batting first), the omission of Wood in Adelaide and Broad in Melbourne also left much to be desired.
    England’s team (on paper at least) still isn’t too bad, so you’d expect them to do better in any case (admittedly they had precious little preparation as far as tour matches were concerned). The knives will certainly be out, with the captain and the coach in the firing line in particular. Joe Root snicking outside off stump in this series is pretty much as frequent as Graham Gooch being lbw (usually to Terry Alderman) in 1989.
    But England’s woes shouldn’t mask the fact that Australia’s batting line-up is still unconvincing.
    I really can’t help but wonder what might’ve been had England chosen to bowl first at the Gabba, with Broad and Anderson in the team.
    Don’t forget Australia won the 2006-07 series 5-0 after Harmison’s wild wide from the first ball. A lot of reports have suggested this set the tone. I don’t agree with that, because England was in the position to recover. After all, England scored 6-551 declared at Adelaide, and then had Australia in trouble before a vital catch was dropped.
    Whereas England could have recovered (and actually started to do so) after a poor start in 2006-07, I really think the writing was on the wall this time around when Rory Burns was out first ball, after the ridiculous decision at the coin toss and for team selections. Every time England threatened to come back and potentially make a contest of it in the first three Tests, the comeback was short-lived, and Australia always went for the jugular. Scott Boland, Jhye Richardson and Michael Neser showed that the bowling stocks are strong, as Australia’s bowlers shared the wickets across the three Tests.

  2. Mark ‘Swish’ Schwerdt says

    Sorry that we couldn’t make it happen CB. One day we will. I never should have moved from my standing room spot. I was home in time for a plate of leftovers.

    40-odd thousand there and they all got their money’s worth. I reckon Starc will get a rest in Sydney.

  3. At one stage, Channel 7 showed one of the most damning statistics I have ever seen. It was a list of English run scorers for calendar 2021. Naturally Root up top with 1700 odd, Burns second!!! with 500 odd, then sundries third!!! Followed by other forgettable names. Never seen anything like it.

  4. Liam Hauser, a very good summation that mirrors many of my thoughts.The thing about Australia’s excellent bowling attack is that it has wall papered over our brittle batting against top line bowlers, especially when the ball is swinging. Hopefully we’ll see some improvement in our batting department over the remaining tests.

  5. Peter Flynn says


    The biggest issue facing Test cricket is the scheduling and the myriad of players seemingly ill-equipped to play good Test cricket overseas.

    Batting techniques are not passing examination.

    All the best.

    Marvin Vaas

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