The 2016 Disco Gamma Cup – Round Fifteen

Greetings Tipsters

 

MEOW MEOW, Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma, yep, that’s what it said on the green paper. How could I not vote for him?

 

Yes, a him. I was a bit disappointed, I was hoping it was a her, wearing a shirt made of ring-pulls, like a young lady I met in a 24 hour bar in 1999 named Princess Lollipop Le Pinke. For real, she showed me her pension card.

 

Meow-Ludo was running for the Science Party and so far has outpolled Drug Law Reform, Socialist Equality, Sex, Cyclists, Renewable Energy and Christian Democrats, who have names like Chris, Oscar, Pat, Noel, Chris and Jamie. This being Grayndler, it was surprising to find the Liberal polling ahead of the Green, perhaps because his name is David van Gogh.  Will he cut off his ear in a fit of pique?

 

Will Banker Mal? Ah, the hubris! OF COURSE he could do better, being a banker/lawyer from Potts Point who occasionally takes the bus if there’s a camera around, than that bicycling, surf-lifesaving Tony.

 

Twenty five seats lost, Mal. Hung parliament – which I called at 20.14 Sat eve. Seems I wasn’t the only one who knew of your life-long ambition to be PM and that you’d tried the ALP before Graeme Richardson told you you’d be wasting your time.

 

It’s a lot like Alan Bond being president of Richmond Bombers.  Or Collingwood’s dispensation of #1 tix. The AFL website ran a space filler about how Carlton and Collingwood had never played each other on the day of a Fed Election. Each could boast two PMs as #1 ticket holders. Carlton had two Victorians who were genuine football fans, Bob Menzies and Mal Fraser, Collingwood had two Sydneysiders never known for a sporting interest, Gough Whitlam and Paul Keating. Good work there, 4&20s.

 

Well, thank the gods that bye-round is done and dusted.

 

Another bye-round problem solved, Gillo, this one’s for you not your older mates, a rolling bye like the NFL. Eight games a week for eighteen weeks, nine games for six. Easy.

 

(Your writer here does the dusting-of-hands to signify a job well-done, with a certain air of imperious mien.)

 

Meanwhile, over in Perth, the Essendon Crashmobile hit a few more stanchions. I watched a lot of the match the next eve, rather more than it deserved cos Port were streaking away midway thru the second.

 

Footscray beat Sydney in a classic, the last term was tremendous. It’s the type of win that can set a team up for the rest of the season, especially a young team, with energy and confidence. 13.5 to 11.13 says it, Bulldogs were sharp and fast, Swans were sloppy, couldn’t nail it when they had the chances.

 

In the first eight rounds, Sydney scored 880 points, an average of 110.  Since then they’ve scored an average of 66.7.  Is that right?  1347 minus 880 divided by 7, yeah, that’s 66.7 and you ain’t gonna win a flag playing like that. Swans are off the radar. If they don’t beat Geelong they’ll be lurking down in the Top Eight Cellar with the Wiggles and the Shinboners.

 

We stayed for the 1970 Cup but it was a dreary match. Remember another much heralded Jack who debuted against Collingwood at the MCG? The latest wore #2 (geddit?  His dad wore 1 and…) and long sleeves that look like a wetsuit these days and has bandy legs and played okay. He seems to have a bit of the ol’ poise.

 

Remember poise? It was a highly-valued quality back in the days of the “raking left foot kick.”

 

Young Jack is also ridiculously handsome, and still has puppy fat. Give him a few years to lean out and Lygon St will be thronged with young women hoping for a glimpse of Silvagni III. If he fulfills his promise he’ll be an almost unnaturally notable footballer.

 

Fifteen rounds in, six teams at 10 and four, only Hawthorn and Adelaide have won more than three straight this week.

 

Cheers Tipsters

 

P&C, A Stop Privatisation Of Footy Production, a division of Trans-Dementia Enterprises.

Brought to you with the assistance of Hawkwind’s ‘Space Ritual’

 

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About Earl O'Neill

Freelance gardener, I've thousands of books, thousands of records, one fast motorcycle and one gorgeous smart funny sexy woman. Life's pretty darn neat.

Comments

  1. Rulebook says:

    Entertaining as always,Earl is big mal below the bombers and lions on the Premiership table ?

  2. G’day Earl

    I thought that Carlton had connections with Labor Party as the Blues are a blue collars’ club. I’m surprised with the connection with Liberal.

    Then both Blues and Coalition struggled on Saturday. I wanted Carlton to win so am sad..

    The exstence of big rivalries is one of reasons why I love footy. It doesn’t happen in Japanese baseball at all. My hometown has only one baseball team and everyone supports them. As I don’t like the hometown, I hate them. It can be how Bluebaggers hate Collingwood.

    I wonder why some people still address Footscray for the Western Bulldofs. Even Triple M commentators say Footscray on their live footy coverage. Funny and interesting.

    Cheers

    Yoshi

  3. Peter_B says:

    Good stuff as always Earl. Footy and politics both look like glitter on a turd to me at the moment. Much of the time I hold my nose as the Eagles beat up on the crippled kids, and Carlton, Collingwood, Richmond, Freo etc give us unwatchable dross.
    There is only so much vicarious joy I can get from watching train wrecks.
    But then Sidanee/Bullydogs and Saints/Pussies and your Monaros in general have thrilled me more than I can remember footy doing since my Wiggles unexpected flag run last season.
    My joy in politics and the Almanac comes from seeing the comfortable afflicted and the afflicted given comfort.
    I reckon the whole country needs a bye round.

  4. Earl O'Neill says:

    Rule, Mal is the captain no-one wanted but he owns the beer concession.
    Peter, cynicism is where it’s at. You’ll never be disappointed and often pleasantly surprised.
    Yoshi, oughta send you some books. There’s a lot of history wrapped in the football clubs of Sydney and Melbourne,. Newtown, Sydney Rugby League c;ub, were known as the Bluebags. Henson Park, their old ground, is the best Australian Football venue in Sydney.

  5. Adelaide Dupont says:

    Yoshi: I get it about baseball and the company teams.

    the ‘Scray has an old and enduring name and tradition.

    It is the suburb they were connected to for seventy years.

    There is a good book called the Club. Laura Hale did a thesis on Online Social Media in Australian Sport and she has the best bibliography, which I looked on from time to time.

    The Carlton – Liberal connection really developed in the 1980-1990s. Try to listen to 3AW with the Elliots and the Bluebaggers.

    Peter_B: I don’t like the Eagles being flat-track bullies either. There are lots of smart-arses. Aren’t the Monaros great? And the Wiggle run!

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