The 2014 ‘Mopsy’ Fraser Cup – Finally!

Greetings Tipsters.

It wouldn’t be the end of the season without Mad Monday controversy. A Lions player went blackface in Kobe Bryant gear. Two Demons kitted themselves out as Rolf Harris and a pigtailed girl.

Against that, credit to the Monaros who donned Super Mario costumes and Jonathon Brown for his Toy Story cowboy getup.

Eighteen teams, ten have players hitting the sauce and coaches fretting over how they could do better. There are no idiots in the AFL these days, tho a columnist does miss the likes of Diamond Joe Gutnick and Big Jack Elliott.

Finals, everyone’s got something to say, especially Torrid Tigers Tragics. A win is a win and the match against Sydney was a win but not a pretty one, nor decisive after hitting a five goal lead in the first. Maybe that was the loss Sydney had to have and maybe it was the Tigers Grand Final. But if they show up to play, the match against Port could be a real cracker of a game, going forward if everyone plays their role in the structure and follows the game plan.

Excuse me. The body’s feeling good but the brain has been overtaken by coachspeak.

Last week I rated Port a flag chance. Situation now, they could be out of the finals quicksmart, a failure of a season. Before an ultra-partisan home crowd, Port’ll be fully intent on destroying Richmond. Could be a cracker – could be a walkover.

The other Elim Final doesn’t look so interesting. Essendon, with a good coach this year, have done pretty well. Sometimes they’re great, sometimes they’re terrible. North have greater ambitions and a better, more consistent team.

(Screen card)
Which brings us to – The Qual Finals!
(Musical interlude feat fiddle, banjo, slap bass)

Frinte and the Surf meets the Shower again. Geelong haven’t been the Geelong of recent years. No team that has lost a match by 100+ points has ever won a flag. Low percentage for a Top Four team, a lot of close wins. But that says something, don’t it? This aint a team you can write off too easily.

Hawthorn have strung together one hell of a season. Players out, coach out (Detroit Lions once had a coach die mid-season), and it was Sydney’s thrashing of Geelong that left them second. They’ve won in sterling fashion but their big win over the 4&20s wasn’t as convincing as it ought’ve been. When a team is Very Good, it’s easy to look Great against an opposition that is weak and tired.

The Hawks have won in the H&A but Finals are faster, harder, tougher, they don’t look as sharp as they’d like, the talismanic Rioli won’t be playing. The Cats have scraped through more than we’ve come to expect, but they’ve been training for the close ones.

Will Steve be there to spark up his team? Will Brian be there to lock down Tom? Your columnist would not be surprised if this match was decided by a kick after the siren.

Satarvo, and the team FKA The Funky Purps cross the island continent to meet Horse’s Swans, leaving their two best backmen at home nursing injuries.

As good as the Docs are, it’s hard to see them containing the ridiculous amount of forward strength that will be out there in red and white The midfields are a good match both ways, and it’s hard to go past a 9 foot ruckman but the bloke that would’ve taken Adam – like that’s easy? – will now take Bud or Kurt.

“But really, how does he reckon this will play out?” cry the readers.

Sydney will likely get a week off. Essendon will get to wear silly clothes on Monday and there’s a chance that Richmond will join them. I’ve no idea who North will play the next week.

If Sydney win, they’ll play the Prelim on a Friday, win that and have a day in hand over their GF opponents. The flag is theirs to lose. Forward, centre, back, they match or exceed the rest of the Four. But they’ve only one ruckman and $10 million on his shoulders.

Cheers, Tipsters

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Brought to you with the assistance of ‘Nashville, Dallas, Hollywood, 1927-1942’, a wickedly fantastic C&W compilation.

About Earl O'Neill

Freelance gardener, I've thousands of books, thousands of records, one fast motorcycle and one gorgeous smart funny sexy woman. Life's pretty darn neat.


  1. Nice one Earl. You reminded me of the ‘expect the unexpected’ aspect of finals. Just when we think it all makes logical sense, there is injuries, weather and delayed airplanes.

  2. Don’t you worry about he Tigers Mopsy O’Neill, they’ve not run out of steam yet. Last year’s capitulation to The Softcocks is still smarting. They’ll hit the ground running, mark my words. And that’s not just the Tigerland jungle Juice talking. Port were good early, but only bravery has pulled them back into it since they lost their mojo back in Round XV. It won’t be a pushover. As you say, it’s going to be a cracker, but there’s a saying in the Deep Woods, it is less frightening to look into the eyes of The Ghost Who Walks than face 22 Angry Tigers.

    Or is it the other way around?

  3. Earl O'Neill says

    Wrap, if you TTTs didn’t exist I’d have had to invent you. Bless.
    Now, where can I get me some of this Tigerland Jungle Juice? Clandestine meets in dark lanes with bundles of cash are no doubt required.

  4. Earl. I don’t know how you could say the Hawks v Cats would be decided by a kick. Cats haven’t been the same all season; winning close ones shows their susceptibility.
    Freo, like last year are pretenders and the Roo boys might just bring their A game against a Bombers torn by rumour and press leaks.
    As for the mighty Tigers we will take all before us reaching form at the pointy end of the season. Loser Swans v Freo will not play Fri night as they have to play Tigers after a Sunday game – another blunder by the AFL.
    PREDICTION – Tigers v Hawks GF

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