Round 1 – St Kilda v Brisbane: Out the Back, URTI and Costco

If you run into the back of a Merc in Doncaster there is a fair chance that it will be driven by an orthodontist. There are about twenty five working within walking distance of my practice. They are a nice lot but one of the practices, my favourite, once a year, gives me some Medallion Club tickets with a car park.


Now, up to yesterday I always lose my car when I park at Colonial Stadium, but now I have a Merc which is linked to my phone so I have my positioning down pat. Unfortunately for us Brisbane supporters, positioning cost us a very ‘winnable’ game.


Brisbane went in as expected, well how I expected, with several new and recycled players, and the Saints had to play for the first time without Nick so the supporters of both clubs had plenty to look forward to.


The first quarter was a miniature of the whole match, St Kilda scoring four goals ‘out the back’ with players running forward of the ball into an open goal. I would estimate that St.Kilda scored well over half their goals this way. This is a proportion of total goals I have never seen any other team get anywhere near in any game of footy I have ever seen.


A woman next to me was saying, early on in the game, that Brissie should be playing an extra man in defence, and she kept saying it, as Sainters kept tapping the ball through from one yard out. She was annoyed at Fagan refusing to see the evidence in front of him but she (my sister) is a lawyer and so has half a brain.


She used to have a complete brain but forty years of Family Law does things to you.


Even in the last quarter there were many times when the Sainters were streaming forward with nothing between them and the goals. The only improvement in the Brissie defence is that the Saint’s goals, in the last quarter, were kicked from forty yards rather than one yard. The structural problem was identical and completely ignored from the coaching staff. Merely saying it was due to turnovers, eventually, doesn’t wash


So what of the individual players. Carlisle gave Hipwood, Brisbane’s great white hope, a bath. Stefan Martin showed that the go home factor, in Billy Longer’s case, was a blessing for Brisbane. Why Longer usually allows the opposing ruckman to get in front puzzles me.


Various onballers of both sides got lots of kicks but who knows if they actually got more than their direct opponents. Remember, because of the ridiculous interchange allowance, mid field opponents’ change at least five times a quarter. Jack Billings kicked two real rover’s goals which I enjoyed watching. I would have enjoyed him scoring from a few cheap frees so I could hear, from the crowd, something that means the season has started i.e. “Don’t touch him”.


The Saints scored freely without Nick but they will never score as many identical cheap goals as today. Brisbane don’t have a forward line as Walker is only an honest battler at best and Hipwood is two years away from being a key forward. Charlie Cameron and Luke Hodge showed the class you see in players from strong clubs.


My woes continued after the game as I realised that my sore throat is from a cold and the real reason I hate twilight games is that Costco is shut by the time the game is over. The 1.00 pm starts are terrific, watch a game and go to Costco on the way home. My wife loves it!


So do I.


  1. Yvette Wroby says

    As a Saints fan Phil, was happy to see the coaching staff didn’t change the game plan. Suited us very well after your team set up a reasonable opposition.

  2. Your opening line is leader in the clubhouse for best first line of 2018:

    “If you run into the back of a Merc in Doncaster there is a fair chance that it will be driven by an orthodontist. ”

    Love your voice Phil.

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