Free Settler Conundrums: If You Had To Choose (SA Version)

It’s a tough gig for those of us not hailing from the deconstructed coffee zone of the inner northern suburbs of Melbourne.

Phil Dimitriadis’ recent effort this week was another piss poor example of the cultural sway that the likes or Preston, Coburg, North Fitzroy and, at a pinch, Thornbury are having over this once venerated site. Rita Panahi, Jane Bunn, Weddings Parties Anything, who are these people?

Crumbs, you’d be hard pressed to nominate a single recent contributor to the Almanac that hasn’t hailed from Melbourne’s inner north. It’s time to finally give SA a go (or Ormond 3204 if you moved over here for economic reasons only and will move back there one day, promise).

To redress this grossly improper imbalance, I’m giving the opportunity for all South Australians to cast their own votes on these culturally significant concerns. Feel free to suggest some others.

Sno Top or Big Sars?

Port or Crows?

Barrie or Russell?

Stars or Scandal?

Fat Cat or Humphrey?

Willsy or Jane Reilly?

Bert Day or Vin Lewis?

Rick Keegan or Bruce McAvaney?

Peter Marker or Ian Day?

Wally May

Max Hall or Eldon Crouch?

Bicks or Rowey?

U-Bombs or Black Chrome?

The Dagoes or Exploding White Mice?

J Cahill or G Cornes?

Bob Moran or John H Ellers?

Pale Ale or Sparkling?

Glenelg or Somerton?

Royal Adelaide or Grange?

Mt Lofty or Mt Osmond?

Vilis or Balfours?

Hillbank or Brahma Lodge?

Tony Casserly or Denis Jones?

Platts or Gilly?

Sonny or Wilbur?

Mcintosh or M Aish?

Bagshaw or Halbert?

Max Basheer or Wayne Jackson?

Cheltenham or Victoria Park?

Popeye or Paddle Boats?

Custard Tart or Frog Cake?

Fritz or Metwurst?

Findon or Tonsley?

Heaven or The Venue?

Tivoli or The Old Lion?

Steve Davis or Max O’Connell?

Mallett or Jenner?

Ian or Greg?

Wang Wang or Funi?

Dunstan or Bannon?

Holden or Mitsubishi?

Nick or Natasha?

Keith Conlon or Peter Goers?

Steve Whitham or Daisy Day?

Amscol or Golden North?

Bart or CS?

Focus Video or Kenmax Electrical?

Mannum or Morgan?

Berri or Waikerie?

Blighty

Dave Brown or Rulebook?

Andy Upton or Thomas Edmonds?

Tanu(n)da or Angaston?

Eudunda or Kapunda?

SANFL or AFL?

Angels or Cold Chisel?

Rick Davies or Peter Darley?

Bay Disco or Redlegs?

Museum or Art Gallery?

Queen’s Head or General Havelock?

Magic Mountain or Beach House?

Main South or Main North?

Winky Dink or Hot Dog?

Semaphore or Largs?

Rundle or Hindley?

Greg Champion or Paul Kelly?

Fred Phillis or Wayne Phillis?

Draught or Export?

Apollo Stadium or Thebarton Town Hall?

KG or Kerls?

5KA or 5AD?

Wolf or Sir James?

Joan McInnes or Lady Joan Hardy?

Hookesy or Rick Darling?

Troy Bond or Shane Bond?

Marion or West Lakes?

Robyn Archer or Keith Michell?

Keith Martin (is he still going?)

 

FAlmanac banner sq

About Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt

Saw my first SANFL game in 1967 - Dogs v Peckers. Have only ever seen the Dogs win 1 final in the flesh (1972 1st Semi) Mediocre forward pocket for the AUFC Blacks (1982-89) Life member - Ormond Netball Club -That's me on the right

Comments

  1. Cathryn McDonald says:

    Finally something relevant to the postcodes starting with 5, even if I’m a little bit under 35…

    Bicks or Rowey? Neither. Cahill > Cornes. Pale > Sparkling. Balfours > Vilis. Custard tart > Frog cake. Hindley, unless it’s Mad March, in which case Rundle. West Lakes – but not for footy!

    Magic Mountain >>> Beach House. I remember being invited to a public meeting with Mike Rann about that when I was 11. He only answered the adults’ questions, before being ushered out the back to avoid being accosted by angry primary school children…

  2. Phillip Dimitriadis says:

    What planet are you people from again? Kapunda sound about right…

  3. @ichymochek says:

    Sno Top

    Port

    Barrie

    Fat Cat

    Jane Reilly

    Peter Marker

    Bicks or Rowey? Neither

    J Cahill

    Bob Moran

    Pale Ale

    Somerton

    Grange

    Mt Lofty

    Vilis

    Mcintosh

    Popeye

    Custard Tart

    Metwurst

    Tonsley

    Greg

    Bannon

    Mitsubishi

    Keith Conlon

    Golden North

    Focus Video

    Mannum

    Blighty

    Dave Brown

    AFL

    Rick Davies

    Bay Disco

    Museum

    Queen’s Head

    Magic Mountain

    Main South

    Semaphore

    Hindley

    Greg Champion

    Wayne Phillis

    Draught or Export? No

    Apollo Stadium

    KG or Kerls? Both

    5KA

    Sir James

    Hookesy

    Shane Bond

    Marion

    Robyn Archer

  4. @ichymochek says:

    Darren or Andrew?

    Maggie Beer or Poh?

    Red Hen or Super?

    Aldinga or Maslins?

    Rob Kelvin or Kevin Crease?

    The Stag or The Ex?

    Crown & Anchor or The Grace?

    Brighton High or Mawson?

    Sacred Heart or Westminster?

    Leon Byner or Matthew Abraham?

    Colonnades or TTP?

  5. @ichymochek says:

    A pint or a pint?

  6. charlie brown says:

    schwartz or agars
    news or advertiser
    saints (silver) or princes (tarnished)
    adelaide or flinders
    st marks or aquinas
    pie floater or nothing

  7. McAlmanac says:

    Superb, but surely it should have read Bay Disco or Sam’s?

    A few more:

    Ralphy or Buff?
    Penfolds or Wolf Blass?
    Downtown or Tilt?
    Kevin Crease or Rob Kelvin?
    Lionel Williams or Ernie Sigley?
    Rod McLeod or Brian Lees?
    GPO piecart or Railway Station piecart?
    Saints or PAC?

  8. McAlmanac says:

    Definitely Max O’Connell – most affable, effortless cricket umpire I came across.
    Definitely Peter Darley – the original Jumbo Prince.
    Definitely Stars – Quick On The Draw!

  9. Phillip Dimitriadis says:

    The entire history of Souff Austrayan culture in 40 seconds: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzA2nFklDo4

  10. Peter_B says:

    Dear Mr Dimitriadis,
    The polluting effect of the inner northern suburbs of Melbourne is readily apparent in the video you are distributing. Young Kernahan was of outstanding character and lineage before venturing east.

  11. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Thanks all.

    Cathryn, Magic Mountain was Adelaide Oval to the Beach House’s Footy Park

    Ichy, some very good Bay area perspectives there (prefer Bart Cummings to Colonnades)

    Charlie, no one had Flinders as first preference

    McAlmanac, Downtown or Tilt is gold. (I’ll email you a 5KA ad starring Rod McLeod). Worked with Max, shared a side fence with Steve. (Yep, Sam’s it should have been)

    PB, Phil’s Greek as well, so doubly afflicted in the culture stakes.

  12. Luke Reynolds says:

    Hardly understood a word you’ve said Swish. The weird language of the South Australian nation….

    Fat Cat or Humphrey- South Australia, the pants optional state

    Pale Ale or Sparkling? Pale Ale by the length of the Torrens

    Ian or Greg? Trevor

    Dave Brown or Rulebook? Depends on whether you want punctuation or raffle tickets

    If Hooksey is the question he is always the answer

    Go Bushrangers

  13. Yes, Golden North!
    Yes, Draught!
    Yes, the Queens Head!
    What about the Norwood Pie Cart?
    Don’t Forget Cowleys?
    And here is a question for you? Was there an alternative to the Portabello on Melbourne St!
    You forgot the Spooner conundrum? Saints or PAC?

  14. Topend Bungeye says:

    Unemployed or leaving the state.
    ESL or ridiculously high electricity
    Crowey or umpire liker
    Balanced journalism or Rucci
    Power station or blackouts

  15. charlie brown says:

    Portabello or Marcellina?

    Cobbs or Checkmates or CrazyHorse?

    Victor Harbour or Victor Harbor?

    Craigburn or Craigmore?

    Beaumont or Snowtown?

  16. The Philby says:

    Woodies Sno Top >>> old school Halls Sno Top >>> Woodies Lemonade with EXTRA TANG >>>>>>>>>>>>> Big Sars
    “Mate, the Ess Aye En Eff Ell, have you heard of…. no, not the Sanfull…”
    HATELEY
    Humphrey B Bear of Tynte Street, North Adelaide
    Willsy, easily
    They’ll put the young Bruce on the stamp (stolen from a screenshot on a SA Football Archive)
    Well, Television’s Ian Day was a South premiership footballer but Television’s Peter Marker had South Australia’s second-finest moustache
    “Good comment!”
    Bick(ford)s (Lime Cordial)
    G Cornes got the Panthers into two (2) final series; J Cahill got the Panthers, uh, five (5) wins
    Frank Agostino
    That case of Extra Vintage Ale that has been in a relative’s garage for six years >>> Sparkling >>> Dark >>> Pale >>> Portagaff (half Stout / half Woodies lemonade) >>> Stout (not as good as Southwark Stout) >>>>>>>>> DB
    Glenelg, but the missus made us go to West Terrace Cemetery when we were over at Easter to find Somerton Man’s grave
    Royal Adelaide, preferably with a Red Hen cutting through
    Tapleys Hill was the South’s best view of Skyshow
    Vili’s >>> Gibbs >>> Balfours
    Noarlunga Downs or Huntfield Heights?
    Platts
    Mcintosh (hilarious in lyrca, Aish was soft)
    Max Basheer of Max Basheer Reserve
    Victoria Park
    Paddle Boats (good lord Popeye is such a boring let down)
    Kitchener Bun
    “They don’t have Firiiiitz in Sydneeeeey…”
    Tonsley
    The Night Rider bus stop outside Heaven on West Terrace
    Tivoli (stuffed if I am going up to North Adelaide)
    SACA still has an injunction out to prevent me commenting on Cricket umpires in South Australia
    Rowdy
    Ian
    Er, aren’t they dishes at Hawkers Corner?
    Bannon – forget Don’s pink shorts and safari suits, JB has the most on fleek profile photo on Wikipedia
    Mitsubishi – the south will rise again
    Goers’ pure, undiluted bitchiness
    Daisy Day, former graduate of his radio school and assisted me in coaxing the secret record stash from Bob Francis
    Blindly staring at mum’s poor choice of vinyl in an old Amscol mike crate
    Mooooovielaaaaand, we’ll entertain you!
    Mannum
    Berri, Home of the Big Orange (contains crates of oranges within)
    He was no Ralph Sewer
    Rulebook, because he sent me e-mails while I was on holiday recently and still haven’t got around to them (expect Dave will be blocking me on Twitter very soon)
    Tanuda
    Meadows or Macclesfield?
    SFL (up the Emus) or GSFL?
    As a former pommie colleague would say: Cheezels
    Darley
    State Library
    General Havelock
    Puzzle Park (just off the freeway at Murray Bridge) or Greenhills?
    Main South (technically I still live on Main South for tax purposes)
    Winky Dink
    Semaphore
    Hindley
    Both are the great folk artists of the place
    Wayne Phillis Ford of Christies Beach
    Southwark Bitter (la mort verte)
    The Barton Town Hall (sorry, but I am from Sydney these days)
    Kerls as Boundary Rider on a sodden night at Footy Park
    SAFM, 107.1 or 91.1 in the Foothills
    Sir James (Reynella krew represent)
    Hooooooookesy
    Jeremy Cordeaux’s best teenage friend, The Caleb Bond
    Marion (THIRTY MOVIE SCREENS)
    Keith Martin’s Almanack – $19.95 at all good newsagents and bookstores

  17. The Philby says:

    Oh, bugger – it was Halls Lemonade that had EXTRA TANG, not Woodies Lemonade (lifeblood of the nation).

  18. Dave Brown says:

    Deep breath: Big Sars, Crows, Barrie, is it bed time already?, Miss Beach Girl, Day, gee you just feel, the one that played in South’s most recent premiership, Crouch, Rowey up to and including 1997, U-Bombs, EWM, ABC (Anyone But Cornes), Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Moran, Sparkling – out of the tap smells like bananas, Somerton, the Pat, Mt Remarkable, Vilis, Hillbank, you can have my pick, Gilly, Wilbur, not picking between good Norwood people, Bagshaw, the Adelaide Oval stand, the one not so close to Alberton, the kids have asked for both next holidays, trick question – no-one actually likes frog cakes, the one they don’t make in Sydney, the one with the skid kids, Heaven (played for Railways), the Tiv, O’Connell, Mallett, f@#$ing Ian, Funi, the one I could’ve beaten in a running race, Elfin, Natasha, he of the Volvo, the one that has a business on the Parade, the one in Laura, CS, Kenmax, Mannum, the one with the bakery (& eventually Citrus Bob’s statue), the good Norwood person, Upton, where’s Tanuda?, I wunda, SANFL, Apprentices, Rick, the one I have a matchbook from, the one with the Egyptian room, Queen’s Head, giant turd (gets a mention on Footy Gospel tonight), Main North – more options, Winky Dink, the one with the steam train, the one with fewer hookah’s and the homophone, still not picking between good Norwood people, the Norwood premiership player, depends how blocked my drains are, never saw the 6ers at Thebby, Cenchul Deeshtricts, KA – stereo AM, the good Norwood man, I Joan mind, Hookesy, the Crows premiership player, Marion, the one with the regional theatre named after them

  19. Peter_B says:

    Dear Mr Schwerdt,
    A fine assemblage of talent. Well done sir. Though some of the offerings suggest a lineage north of the Yatala Line.
    Sno Top or Big Sars? PASS – WOODIE WOODROOFE’S FOR MINE.

    Port or Crows? PORT WERE BEYOND THE PALE GROWING UP, BUT I COULD NOT POSSIBLY MAKE A CHOICE BEFORE THE WEEKEND’S HOSTILITIES.

    Barrie or Russell? LORD BARRIE.

    Stars or Scandal? STARS.

    Fat Cat or Humphrey? HUMPHREY. I WAS NEVER THE SAME AFTER FC OFFERED ME LOLLIES IN THE GENTS.

    Willsy or Jane Reilly? JANE – BE STILL MY BEATING LOINS.

    Bert Day or Vin Lewis? BERT – IS RON PAPPS STILL GOING?

    Rick Keegan or Bruce McAvaney? BRUCE – ANOTHER GREAT TAINTED BY TOO MUCH TIME EAST.

    Peter Marker or Ian Day? IAN DAY – I WAS AT THE ’64 GF

    Wally May – WHY NO TED LANGRIDGE OPTION?

    Max Hall or Eldon Crouch? MAX – THE GODFREY’S BARGAIN CENTRE GUARANTEED TO THE DOOR ON 5KA

    Bicks or Rowey? CAN’T CHOOSE UNTIL AFTER THE LOBOTOMY

    U-Bombs or Black Chrome? QUE?

    The Dagoes or Exploding White Mice? QUE QUE?

    J Cahill or G Cornes? JACK

    Bob Moran or John H Ellers? BARBARA ANN

    Pale Ale or Sparkling? THE RED DEVIL

    Glenelg or Somerton? SOMERTON

    Royal Adelaide or Grange? GRANGE FOR WINE – NEVER LIKED QUEEN ADELAIDE – BUT RA FOR GOLF

    Mt Lofty or Mt Osmond? MT LOFTY – I WAS ONCE A MEMBER OF THE ROYAL AND ANCIENT IN THE PICCADILY VALLEY. DAD STILL PLAYS TWICE A WEEK.

    Vilis or Balfours? BALFOURS. AND PRICES PASTIES FROM KADINA.

    Hillbank or Brahma Lodge? PASS – NORTH OF THE YATALA LINE.

    Tony Casserly or Denis Jones? SEE PREVIOUS.

    Platts or Gilly? PLATTS

    Sonny or Wilbur? SONNY

    Mcintosh or M Aish? THE IMMOVABLE MAC

    Bagshaw or Halbert? BAGSHAW – A PRINCE OF PLAYERS

    Max Basheer or Wayne Jackson? JACKO – THE FINEST COACH TORRENS EVER HAD.

    Cheltenham or Victoria Park? VICTORIA PARK – THE DERBY STAND

    Popeye or Paddle Boats? PADDLE BOATS

    Custard Tart or Frog Cake? PASS

    Fritz or Metwurst? METWURST

    Findon or Tonsley? SAW CAPTAIN MATCHBOX AT THE TONSLEY

    Heaven or The Venue? LINDSAY?

    Tivoli or The Old Lion? THE TIV.

    Steve Davis or Max O’Connell? MAX – STEVE WAS TOO FAT AND SLOW TO KEEP UP WITH FOOTBALLERS

    Mallett or Jenner? TJ PROVIDED A BLUEPRINT THAT I SUCCEEDED IN LIVING DOWN TO. REGRETTABLY.

    Ian or Greg? IAN FOR MY LIFE. GREG FOR PLEASURE.

    Wang Wang or Funi? QUE QUE QUE?

    Dunstan or Bannon? DUNSTAN BLAZED THE TRAIL.

    Holden or Mitsubishi? KINGSWOOD COUNTRY

    Nick or Natasha? NIC NAIT DEFINITELY.

    Keith Conlon or Peter Goers? KEITH WAS THE BEST DRUMMER THE WESLEY TRIO EVER HAD

    Steve Whitham or Daisy Day? MEMORY FAILS

    Amscol or Golden North? GOLDEN NORTH HONEY ICE CREAM – HARD TO FIND SOUTH OF CLARE

    Bart or CS? CS – THE FUTURE BELONGS TO THOSE WHO PLAN FOR IT. REGRETTABLY I TOOK TJ’S TIPS INSTEAD.

    Focus Video or Kenmax Electrical? RADIO RENTALS HP

    Mannum or Morgan? MANNUM

    Berri or Waikerie? RENMARK ROVERS – ALL HAIL THE SEEKAMP BROTHERS

    Blighty – TH E HAND OF GOD

    Dave Brown or Rulebook? TRICK QUESTION – LIKE HAVE I STOPPED BEATING MY WIFE? HOW ARE NORWOOD GOING THIS YEAR? NOTICED NEITHER HAVE MENTIONED REDLEGS LATELY.

    Andy Upton or Thomas Edmonds? THOMAS EDMONDS – SOMEONE HAD TO CLASS UP THE GOOD FRIDAY APPEAL

    Tanuda or Angaston? ANGASTON

    Eudunda or Kapunda? KAPUNDA HAS A TROTTING TRACK

    SANFL or AFL? SANFL – THE GUNSHOT MARRIAGE OF THE MIGHTY EAGLES AND THE PECKERS WAS THE END OF CIVILISATION AS WE KNOW IT

    Angels or Cold Chisel? CHISELS – DON WALKER

    Rick Davies or Peter Darley? THE JUMBO PRINCE

    Bay Disco or Redlegs? PASS

    Museum or Art Gallery? GALLERY

    Queen’s Head or General Havelock? THE QUEENS

    Magic Mountain or Beach House? THE MOUNTAIN

    Main South or Main North? MAIN SOUTH – CLOSE YOUR EYES AND HOLD YOUR NOSE FOR 30K’S AFTER GEPPS CROSS ON THE WAY NORTH TO THE BAROSSA

    Winky Dink or Hot Dog? THE WANKER

    Semaphore or Largs? LARGS

    Rundle or Hindley? RUNDLE

    Greg Champion or Paul Kelly? PK IS A NATIONAL TREASURE

    Fred Phillis or Wayne Phillis? FREDDIE – HIS KICKING WOES WERE MULVIHILLIAN.

    Draught or Export? EXPORT – GREEN LABEL?

    Apollo Stadium or Thebarton Town Hall? THE BARTON – HOLY GROUND.

    KG or Kerls? KERLS

    5KA or 5AD? BARRY BISSEL – 5KA

    Wolf or Sir James? WOLF RACED HORSES – JIM RACED YACHTS – I’LL DRINK THE PEOPLE’S DROP

    Joan McInnes or Lady Joan Hardy? ALWAYS JOAN MCINNES – WHO WAS THE FOOTY BEAU – BOB SHEARMAN? WHO DID GEOFF KINGSTON DATE? I REMEMBER DROOLING.

    Hookesy or Rick Darling? HOOKESY – DEAD EYE WAS LIKE SOBERS

    Troy Bond or Shane Bond? JAMES

    Marion or West Lakes? MARION – WHO WANTS TO SHOP IN A SWAMP

    Robyn Archer or Keith Michell? ROBYN – VOICE OF AN ANGEL; TONGUE OF A CHIPPY

    Keith Martin (is he still going?) – MUM USED TO SAY THE SUN WON’T RISE WITHOUT KEITH’S PERMISSION

  20. Tremendous, Swish.

    Of course, the posing of these questions matters more than their answering. Genius.

    Having said this, it’s Kapunda, Sparkling, and Troy Bond.

  21. I have looked twice and cannot see a mention of Redgum. “sigh”
    Surely Adelaide’s greatest contribution to Australian culture.

  22. Mark Duffett says:

    John Martin’s or Cox Foy’s?

    Adelaide or Flinders?

    Birdman Rally or Christmas Appeal?

    Robin Roenfeldt or John Oster?

  23. Mark Duffett says:

    Oh and getting really niche now…

    621 Duke of Edinburgh or 520 Sir Malcolm Barclay Harvey?

  24. Sno Top or Big Sars? – Sno Top
    Port or Crows? – Sturt
    Barrie or Russell? – Barrie
    Stars or Scandal? – Stars
    Fat Cat or Humphrey? – Humphrey because I hated Fat Cat telling me it was bedtime,
    Willsy or Jane Reilly? – Jane, oh my sweet Jane
    Rick Keegan or Bruce McAvaney? – Anne Fulwood
    Peter Marker or Ian Day? – Peter Marker
    The Dagoes or Exploding White Mice? – The Mice
    J Cahill or G Cornes? – Jack. As a sturt supporter living amongst Tiger supporters it was my mission to bag everything Tigerish. That poonce Cornes made it easy.
    Bob Moran or John H Ellers? – Ellers
    Pale Ale or Sparkling? – Pale
    Glenelg or Somerton? – Somerton
    Vilis or Balfours? – Cowleys
    Mcintosh or M Aish? – Mcintosh
    Bagshaw or Halbert? – Bagshaw, my hero. The guy was still doing dropkicks in 1976.
    Max Basheer or Wayne Jackson? – Max the Panda.
    Cheltenham or Victoria Park? – VP
    Popeye or Paddle Boats? – Paddle
    Custard Tart or Frog Cake? – CT, no one really eats frog cakes.
    Fritz or Metwurst? – Fritz. Nothing better than a fritz and tomato sauce sanga.
    Findon or Tonsley? – Tonsley
    Tivoli or The Old Lion? – Tiv
    Mallett or Jenner? – tied
    Ian or Greg? – Ian
    Wang Wang or Funi? – Max Basheer
    Dunstan or Bannon? – Dunstan
    Holden or Mitsubishi? – Holden
    Nick or Natasha? – Why?
    Steve Whitham or Daisy Day? – Daisy
    Amscol or Golden North? – Amscol
    Bart or CS? – Both
    Focus Video or Kenmax Electrical? – Focus
    Mannum or Morgan? – Mannum
    Berri or Waikerie? – Renmark
    Dave Brown or Rulebook? – ?
    SANFL or AFL? – SANFL. When I attended AFL in Brisbane I get no sense of the rivalry, the hatred, the sadness, the disappointment, the joy, the fun. the intimacy of small grounds, the edible and affordable food, Coopers. Its just not there and I miss it.
    Angels or Cold Chisel? – Chisel
    Rick Davies or Peter Darley? – Jumbo
    Bay Disco or Redlegs? – Bay
    Magic Mountain or Beach House? – Magic
    Main South or Main North? – South
    Winky Dink or Hot Dog? – Winky until he got the mohawk
    Semaphore or Largs? – Semaphore
    Rundle or Hindley? – Rundle
    Greg Champion or Paul Kelly? – PK, saw him with the Dots at Festival theatre in 81 or 82.
    Fred Phillis or Wayne Phillis? – Down at the Bay the tram sometimes toots, and somewhere in a bin are
    Freddies golden boots.
    Draught or Export? – green death
    Apollo Stadium or Thebarton Town Hall? – Thebarton
    KG or Kerls? – KG
    5KA or 5AD? – KA
    Wolf or Sir James? – any
    Joan McInnes or Lady Joan Hardy? – Joan
    Hookesy or Rick Darling? – Hookes
    Marion or West Lakes? – Marion, the quarterdeck

  25. Rick Kane says:

    Hindley St or Hell …

  26. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Wow, my phone has been going off like opening night at the Melbourne St sex shop.

    Luke – Rulebook thinks punctuation is a Thai kickboxing move

    6% – in my parts it was High or Boy’s Tech?

    Topend – On your bike then

    Charlie – Port Elliot

    Philby – Adelaidean Homesick Blues?

    Dave – did you dictate and Rulebook typed?

    PB – love it that you’ve got Rod Seekamp’s hairdo

    Mickey – Bingo (eyes down 7:30, Milner Rd Richmond)

    Smokie – Gordon’s got the Redgum quota sorted

    Mark D – Dean or Rob?

    Daly – Lou Reed loved her too

    Rick – be careful where you book next time

  27. Good As says:

    Oh Swish,

    So hard to choose….but shows a shocking bias against the Double Blues by not mentioning the late Noel Pettingill – alright he mainly played for Norwood, but the goal he kicked for the Sturt reserves from a free in he centre circle at Unley had to be seen to be believed. And what about Michael Graham. And Peter Motley – best footballer I ever saw, although I maintain Sarge was the best on either foot.

    I’m only answering the sensible questions!
    Crows. Is there any other team?

    Barrie or Russell? Saw The Jumbo prince clean up Rodney (pre-video tribunal) in front of the North Members one day at Prospect. Jumbo by a mile.

    Fat Cat or Humphrey? No pants. So SA.

    Peter Marker or Ian Day? The moustache. So magnificent.

    Bicks or Rowey? The footballer

    J Cahill or G Cornes? Never Port and never the ponce from the Bay. Phil Carman for me.

    Pale Ale or Sparkling? Sparkling, but any coldie in a storm

    Mt Lofty or Mt Osmond? All the best girls came from the hills (was that the point of the question?)

    Vilis or Balfours? Balfours

    Mcintosh or M Aish? Played cricket against McIntosh. Bloody scary.

    Bagshaw or Halbert? Bagshaw – even if he played some of his career with one ball.

    Cheltenham or Victoria Park? Vic Park. Ran into the barriers there twice in one night after a big night at the Uni Bar.

    Fritz or Metwurst? Fritz. What is this other stuff you talk about?

    Mallett or Jenner? TJ. Could play.

    Dunstan or Bannon? Don. Went shopping with the people every Saturday morning on the Parade.

    Holden or Mitsubishi? Loved my EH, but the Mitsubishi actually started every morning.

    Amscol or Golden North? Golden North Honey. Oh that was heaven!

    Mannum or Morgan? Swan Reach

    Blighty

    Dave Brown or Rulebook? Has to be Rulebook. He knows where I live.

    Tanuda or Angaston? Nuri

    Angels or Cold Chisel? Both played at my high school socials. Chisel but they did promise to come back next year and never did. Think they might have become famous by then!

    Rick Davies or Peter Darley? Jumbo, always

    Bay Disco or Redlegs? Redlegs. Got banned.

    Queen’s Head or General Havelock? QH.

    Main South or Main North? Spent two years driving up MN for work. Drove done MS once and got rear ended. A draw.

    Rundle or Hindley? Depends on the time of day.

    Greg Champion or Paul Kelly? Champion sang the original Crows theme song to the tune of “When the Saints Go Marching In” after the GF in 1997. Pretty hard to top that.

    Fred Phillis or Wayne Phillis? The golden boots of Fred.

    Draught or Export? Sparking Ale (sorry Swish)

    Apollo Stadium or Thebarton Town Hall? Apollo. So many loud memories

    5KA or 5AD? KA, but SAFM

    Wolf or Sir James? Worked in the Barossa for 2 years….Charlie Melton….no sailing or poncy white from Charlie

  28. When selecting a radio announcer I’d go for the late John Vincent largely on the strength of his alter-ego rock star as front-man for The Ken Oath Ockerstra.

    Forget Queen live at Wembley, The Ken Oath Ockerstra Live at the Findon is the iconic concert album. Backyard Barbie the standout and signature tune.

    Great thread.

  29. Forgive my ignorance, but what of Chicken Salt? Does it stand alone and without peer, or is there an alternative challenging its epicurean hegemony?

  30. Earl O'Neill says:

    Free settlers? Suckers in a dodgy property development.
    Exploding White Mice, haha, therebe some tales therein. They played a Tuesarvo at the Hopetoun in 1986 and I could hear them from Crown St, 200 yards away.

  31. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Good As – The Angels made it to Port Lincoln?

    Mickey – Loved Vinnie – odd that I didn’t ask “Bazz or Pilko?”

    RTB – The Holy Quadrilogy – Wally May, Blighty, Keith Martin and Chicken Salt

    Earl – The story behind their name always makes me giggle

  32. Rick Kane says:

    Seriously Swish, if Lord Bogan (he says, speaking uninvited on behalf of the good Lord) wanted to do a bit of inner-northern Melbourne suburbs navel gazing he would have kicked it off with the following:

    Preston markets vs Northcote plaza
    Courtney Barnett vs Jen Anderson
    State school education vs (there is no other option)
    David Feeney vs Alex Bhathal
    Welcome to Thornbury vs The Food Truck Park
    Herb Elliott vs Roy Cazaly

    and so on

    Cheers

  33. Hooray for Mickey, Hooray at last, Hooray for Mickey, For he’s a …genius. I waded a long way through this waiting for the most iconic individual in SA history to get a mention and Mickey Randall finally nailed it. John (how ya goin’) Vincent!! Have a signed copy of the said album Live at the Findon and it is as good as it gets! Other selections at random – Russell Ebert, Jane Reilly (queen to Vinnie’s king), Ian Day, Sno Top, J Cahill, Somerton, Vilis, Bagshaw, Ian Chappell, Golden North by a mile, Mannum, Art Gallery, Apollo Stasium, Hookesy. My brain is starting to hurt, might have to go put on my cassette of John Vincent and the Ken Noath Ockerstra with Celsius 69, live at the Findon Hotel! Dubbed from the original LP, still in my possession…

  34. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Thanks Rick, this game can be played at many levels.

    Bucko – “just dropped me matches in, it would give you the willies”

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