Animal Farm: from the new coach of the schoolyard mouse racing

Anyway, I don’t see any problems.
I didn’t do a bad thing.
Lots of people say I did a bad thing.
They say that I broke the rules.
I think everybody should play by the rules.
It’s only fair if we all play by the rules.
That’s what fairness is.
Sort of.
Not really.
Fairness is tricky.

Anyway, Jez is not allowed to play for a whole year.
He was grounded.
I don’t know why.
Ando said so.
And it’s his comp.
But I’m allowed to play.
He let me.

Anyway, it’s alright to give your mouse some Wizz Fizz.
That is no problem.
Some people say that’s a problem.
But it’s not a problem.
Dane said it would make him go faster.
So did Stu.
And we want to win more races.
So we did it.
It’s only Wizz Fizz.
We haven’t won a big race for ages.
That’s all.

Anyway, the Wizz Fizz is alright.
We used a few injections.
I think it’s alright.
The others said so.

Anyway, Jez got in trouble for something else.
I don’t really know what.
It’s weird.
Something about damaging Ando’s comp.
Ando’s comp is huge.
It’s the only one at the big school, really.
It’s not damaged.
There are some other comps at the little school.
But it’s not damaged.

Anyway, everything is getting back to normal now.
I’ve been given the mouse.
Just until Jez is allowed to play again.
It will be great when he’s back.
Then it really will be back to normal.
There’s no problem.
I don’t see any problems, anyway.

By MT.

About David Wilson

David Wilson is a writer, editor, flood forecaster and former school teacher. He writes under the name “E.regnans” at The Footy Almanac and has stories in several books. One of his stories was judged as a finalist in the Tasmanian Writers’ Prize 2021. He shares the care of two daughters and a dog, Pip. He finds playing the guitar a little tricky, but seems to have found a kindred instrument with the ukulele. Favourite tree: Eucalyptus regnans.


  1. You know how to test a fledgling editor ER. What category or tags do I put on this if we want to engage readers, while staying one step ahead of the defamation lawyers? What it says, or what I think it means?
    Promise me you’ll bake a cake with a file in it, if the lawyers come after us.

  2. Luke Reynolds says

    More quality e.regnans work. Great stuff David. You have summed up the whole situation beautifully.

  3. Thanks PB, but I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re…. brea..king… up.

    Thanks Luke, the world can seem strange from the viewpoint of the school yard, can’t it?

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