An Open Letter To Gazza

Gary let me start by saying I am a Geelong supporter so I am obviously going to tell you not to go to Queensland. But I would appreciate it if you could take a minute to read my reasons, many of which are, I think, compelling.

1 – Queensland is higher up than Victoria (as evidenced by the flood waters flowing down to NSW and Vic), so if you suffer from nose bleeds don’t go.

2 – Queensland has lots of Queenslanders in it

3 – Queensland is a place where many people go to retire and die (I’m sure there’s a message in there for you somewhere).

4 – You’ll make plenty of money in Geelong. How much do you need for one lifetime?

5 – The Gold Coast team will wear red jumpers. No offence but with your bald head you might look like an appendage that’s burst a defective condom with that jumper on.

6 – Barry Hall said you should go – so don’t.

7 – James Hird said he thinks you will stay, so stay

8 – How much would you miss playing with Chappy and Jimmy and Corey and Joel (x2) and Max and Moons?  And how much would you hate playing against them?

9 – How will I explain your move to my children?

10 – If you’re looking for a change Geelong will have a new coach next year anyway.

11 – They won’t care about you and understand you in QLD like we do at Geelong.

Should you wish to discuss this move with me I am always available. I know Queensland pretty well as I used to go there for holidays in the 70s and 80s and apparently not much has changed since.



About Damian O'Donnell

I'm passionate about breathing. And you should always chase your passions. If I read one more thing about what defines leadership I think I'll go crazy. Go Cats.


  1. Peter Flynn says


    This is what Fair Dinkum Bobby should have written in his open letter published the other day in The Cream Bun.

    Point 5 will sway Little Gazza.

    PS I have replied to your daughter’s maths query.

  2. “Queensland has lots of Queenslanders in it”

    The most compelling argument against the move anyone has come up with in the whole saga, well done :p

  3. Richard Naco says

    Having lived in Brisneyland for 5 years since you were last there, Dips, I can’t help but agree.

    Harmsy is, of course, the exception that proves the rule (about Queenslanders – but he’s now deeply ebedded in the cradle of Australian democracy – and civilisation – that is Canberra, so he hardly counts as a banana bender any more). ;)

    And for the record: after watching the Geelong midfield’s collective pow-wow with Bruce McAvaney (who, continuing a theme, is an ex-pat croweater) I have a gut feeling that Gaz will choose heart over wallet come season’s end.

    The wondrous thing of the Pivot is that it’s more than just a football club these days. And Gary Ablett knows that better than most.

  4. 3 – That’s always been true of the Cattery. In the words of the voice-over guy on the “Down at Kardinia Park” DVD, “Geelong has always been special. It has dared to be different. It has evoked special memories, produced superheroes, demanded excellence and revelled in its triumphs.”

    But now that’s we’re actually winning, the feeling is even much better – so much better :-D

    I know what you mean about the interview. I’ve always hoped Gazza would stay, believed he should and probably would – but now I really believe he will. Also, what Lingy was saying – he loves the players, loves the club – why would you want to be anywhere else? There’s no way I could see any player who’s been at the Cattery for an extended feeling of time NOT feeling the same as that.

  5. Pamela Sherpa says

    What I find so interesting about the whole Ablett situatuion/turning into saga is that nothing has really changed since Barassi left Melbourne for Carlton.
    Despite footballers being paid professionals, fans for some reason still expect loyalty.
    Dips, I wouldn’t worry about Gazza playing against Moons and co. How do you know they aren’t thinking of going as well?
    As for kids- there’s always “Parents don’t know everything you know”

  6. I wouldn’t stress about Ablett leaving. Everyone at the club seems to love it there too much. Joel Selwood’s brother has ratted him out as being a 99.9% chance to stay. Matty Stokes (poor example, I know) was receiving a lot of interest from other clubs at the end of last season, but he said it was ridiculous – he loved the club and its players too much to leave for any amount of money.

    Mooney is working on a one- to two-year contract with the club, Corey is on the verge of signing… all things look good at Geelong.

    Even if Junior does go, I won’t resent him – I don’t think anyone who read his article in the HS this morning could. He’s so sensible and professional about the whole issue, he has it all in perspective. He will make the right choice, I’m confident of that.

    (but I’d be willing to bet some big money on him staying a Cat if I had it)

  7. Pamela – stop being so bloody logical. Of course footballers are professionals and of course they should aim to get the best out of themselves financially and physically, but I want Gary to stay. Its as simple as that. I’m NOT philosophical about it, I refuse to be logical about it, and I WILL be really sad if he goes. Bit like a kid who has had his train set stolen.

    I call on other Geelong supporters to join me in this childish and pathetic pleading. Stop being so nice about it you people. Get angry. Be annoyed about the “system” – it stinks. Who gives a hoot about Queensland and its stupid red jumper. Let them cellar dwell for a few years; it’ll do them good. Theives they are, nothing but mindless theives.

    Having said that, if he does go, sod him.

  8. Dips, when I first heard the rumours last year – BT all but confirming he had signed with the GCFC(lies, all lies) – I am ashamed to admit I behaved very imaturely.

    An urbane 18-year-old, I put on a performance befitting a much less emotionally-mature 16-year-old. All the Ablett posters were torn down from my walls. I couldn’t get the ones down off the ceiling, as I’d used super-heavy-duty double-sided tape just to get the bloody things up in the first place, so I bought an overlarge novelty flag with a rainbow and a smiley face to cover them up. I screamed and sobbed and told my mum I was swearing off football – self-preservation, I said. If I couldn’t handle this one player going (whom I adore, but is far from my favourite) I clearly had issues.

    Of course, this lasted only two or three days, until the footy was on again. What can I say, I’m addicted. And then I realised, regardless of the future of one G Ablett, I will never pack in football. Because if I cared enough about it to throw a tantrum of such epic proportions, there must be something darn good about it.

    Now, though, I am trying a sage approach to the whole saga (which, despite my active involvement in every discussion/argument, I am thoroughly over :p ).

    Of course, if he does go, I think my ceiling might just be getting ripped apart :-D

  9. Pamela Sherpa says

    You make me laugh Dips. Glad to see you so fired up and caring about your club. I wonder what the clibs themselves are saying collectively to the AFL. Do you think they feel as helpless as the fans?

  10. Nice tantrum Susie – we need more of it.

  11. Steve Healy says

    Ablett has to stay, but im starting to doubt it since he’d probably have said it now if he has decided, unless he is still thinking.

    Of course, Geelong have champion players in their team (chapman, Bartel, Selwood, Scarlett, Mooney, Milburn, Mackie and etc) but getting rid of Ablett leaves a dent in their game plan, since he is the player who extracts the ball from the stoppages.

    But, most of all: He is Gary Ablett, the best player in the competition.

  12. Pamela Sherpa says

    Why didn’t they make him captain?

  13. Steve Healy says


    You’d have to say that it was fair that Ling got the captaincy since he was vice captain already, and he is probably a better figure as a leader at the club.

    That brings up another question, is Ablett certain to get the captaincy when he moves north?

  14. Pamela – we’ve got the right captain. The Cats have finally realised that the best player is not always the best leader. Though some of our previous captains weren’t even the best players either! Basically they stuffed it up until Tommy Harley got the nod.

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