Almanac People: Old Friends
Old friends
Old friends
Sat on their park bench
Like bookends
In 1970 I moved to South Australia from Victoria to begin teacher-training, and my very good fortune was to share a room in a large boarding house with one of your Almanac’s most prolific authors (and editors) IJH.
Ian Jeffrey Hauser had almost simultaneously moved from Queensland to attend the same university.
It’s probably fair to say that we hit it off immediately. We were to discover that we had much in common, one of which was our taste in music. An early album by Simon and Garfunkel called ‘Bookends’ (1968) has our signature tune – ‘Old friends’:
A newspaper blown through the grass
Falls on the round toes
On the high shoes
Of the old friends
The Lutheran Church at that time was attracting prospective teachers for their fast-expanding school system to South Australia with an offer of cheap board. So, Ian and I were surrounded by a hundred or so young people, many like us away from home for the first time, and all together we created a wonderful social and sporting life.
Old friends
Winter companions
The old men
Lost in their overcoats
Waiting for the sunset
Ian and I got our drivers licences together (in SA you could get that a year earlier than other states) and started out on scooters and then cars – his an FJ, and mine a Mini. We both had our first proper girlfriends, spent hours listening to music (CSN&Y, Creedence, Bob Dylan, Woodstock, Cat Stevens, Beatles et al) and played a lot of sport. Independent now, we developed self-confidence and grew into our skins.
The sounds of the city
Sifting through trees
Settle like dust
On the shoulders
Of the old friends
Both in each other’s weddings, we married within a fortnight of each other (today is Marlene and my 47th wedding anniversary), wore the same hired suits and used the same venue (in our wedding photo of the men hamming it up, Ian is on the left). As married couples without kids we spent time dining out, going to live music shows, visiting wine regions, playing cards, Mah Jong, sport, and listening to music. With the brashness of youth, we thought that the age 70 was lightyears away.
Can you imagine us
Years from today
Sharing a park bench quietly?
How terribly strange
To be seventy
Ian and I both embarked on teaching careers, which we both enjoyed. We retired at around the same time to discover we both like writing and continue to love sport – he rugby league and for me AFL. And yesterday was Ian’s 70th birthday (I turned 70 last January). So, I emailed him this song and a message – ‘thanks for just the best friendship’.
Old friends
Memory brushes the same years
Silently sharing the same fear
And we both feel blessed. Happily married, our health is good. We both remain active. Our kids are fit and well. We live in the lucky country. He in very pretty Noosa and we in the Barossa Valley.
Time it was
And what a time it was
It was . . .
A time of innocence
A time of confidences
Great memories of our student days. Our young families grew up together. We catch up when we can. God is good.
Long ago . . . it must be . . .
I have a photograph
Preserve your memories
They’re all that’s left you
And treasured friendships.
More from Andy Thurlow Here
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About
Born on Guernsey in the Channel Islands, my parents migrated to this wonderful country when I was 7. As teachers, my wife and I ‘worked’ in some pretty SA and Queensland tourist locations and ended up in the Barossa Valley, where I enjoy gardening, socialising, reading, writing, sport, travel, handyman projects and wine. Since retiring I’ve written 3 published biographies about Kieran Modra, Rolph and Marg Mayer and Margaret Ames. I started a Valley social cycling and coffee-ing club called the ‘Sprocket Rockets’ https://www.facebook.com/cyclingfunbarossa/ After some success at hockey, volleyball, tennis, golf, Church picnic sprints and the ‘Henley on Todd’ regatta, I’ve settled down to walking, cycling, Fantasy Football and watching sport, particularly AFL and cricket. A Queenslander described me as an ‘Ex-Pommie, ex-Victorian who barracks for Port Adelaide’ so it can only be up from there!
Yes, Andy, that’s ‘our song’. It’s been on my mind a lot lately as I approached yesterday’s milestone. Thanks for sending it to me on the day. We just need to do the photo of it!
70 certainly did look a very, very long way off then; now we’re here. And it’s ok because the basics – faith, family, friends – have seen us through.
So, other brother, ‘thanks for just the best friendship’ to you too.
Now, do you remember…(insert any of 1001 memories)
Thanks Andy for alerting me to Ian’s birthday, and my best wishes to you, Noosa mate.Congratulations on a life well lived, an assessment which I am confident would apply to Andy as well.
It’s a year of milestones for my family, as my wife (along with two other lifelong female friends) has also turned seventy. Last week was our golden wedding anniversary, and our oldest grandson has made it to double figures, three weeks ago.
I had to look it up to confirm, Andy, but I commented on a previous post by you, because of our shared Warrandyte South PS 3476 heritage – although my children and my involvement as a parent was a couple of decades after you.
Best Wishes to you both.
A very nice yarn, Andy.
Thanks for sharing.
Thank you, Peter, for your greeting – warmly received! What are the chances of a Hauser/Fuller/Lowrey lunch sometime in the week between Christmas and New Year? Perhaps even at the Petrel? I can see it now, ‘Three men walk into a bar…’
Sounds like a plan, Ian. I’m certainly available in Christmas week and would be happy to share RL’s and your company anywhere between Geelong and South Yarra.
Poignant. Apposite. Much to be said for surviving long enough and getting out of your own way long enough for life to work its magic.
“We shall not cease from exploration. And the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.” T S Eliot
Old Friends/Bookends was the B side (kids – ask your grandparents) of Mrs Robinson. It was always a joy to find a great B side when most were dross. I could save enough pocket money to buy a 45 single, but albums only became possible once I started working.
Sits with John Prine’s “Hello in There” as a great song about ageing. Late Dylan often makes me weepy. “When the Deal Goes Down”. “Beyond the Horizon”. “Not Dark Yet”.
Have to go and crank up some Springsteen if I listen to them too long. Thanks.
Thanks Andy, fantastic heartfelt account of close friends and the development of friendships over time. And, IJH with long hair, a pearler!
Thanks Andy a great read and most poignant .Reminds me of some sage advice I received many years ago from a mentor .
It doesn’t matter where your life takes you and how successful or not you might be at the end of the journey if you are honest to yourself you will be able to count your real friends on 5 to 10 fingers . Real friends and the memories with them shouldn’t be confused with the many likeable acquaintances you will come across on the journey
I reckon my man was on the money
Thanks for all of the positive comments and pearls of wisdom. A few years back I started a social cycling club in the Barossa Valley (Sprocket Rockets – https://www.facebook.com/cyclingfunbarossa/) and in a few minutes Marley and I will be off cycling to a cafe with about 40 others for coffee and cake. It’s all the Cs – coffee, cake, conversation, community and caring – but in the end and most importantly this weekly event has moved us all through trust into deeper friendship – which is priceless. Take care and have a lovely Christmas.
Thanks Andy (and Ian). Wonderful. How’s the purple suits!
Love it Andy. The words. The pics. The times. The music. The friendships.
This will resonate with a lot of people.
Happy Birthday IJH. I’m thinking you must have been a pup when we taught Grade 11 Modern History in the late 80s. I recall more putting in H Block staffroom on Monday mornings than any other activity, other then the punters club’s post mortems (from MAG and Fred).
JTH, fancy having Lesson 1 on Monday morning free! Surpassed only by scoring a spare last lesson on a Friday. But we can always claim that we used those Monday sessions as lesson preparation and team teaching strategy sessions, albeit while having a bit of putting practice as a bonding exercise. If I was a ‘pup’ of about 35 at that time, what that have made you at 25?
Ian/Peter, free all week so pick your day.
RDL
The photo which seems to have attracted some interest is a celebration of talent. After doing some editing for me, it was clear that Ian had a talent for this (obvious too to you all at the Almanac) and so he began a small editing enterprise. Heidi McLeod (right back in the photo) and I met while I was distributing Kieran Modra’s biography to bookshops and she was searching for an editor for a wonderful story about her grandfather. I suggested Ian and the rest is history. Heidi and Ian clicked and the result was ‘Wilf’ https://www.booktopia.com.au/wilf-heidi-mcleod/book/9781922803054.html In the photo we are celebrating the launch of ‘Wilf’. Good red wine (or wine of any kind) is never far from any of these photos!