Almanac Footy Teams – Where for art thou Ian?: A team of Ians

 

After assembling a team of Bruces last week, the Coodabeen Champions issued me a challenge to come up with a team of Ians.

 

On Twitter, Ian Cover posted a picture with Geelong’s Nankervis brothers and it only seemed fair that Ian join Bruce in the developing pantheon of Footy Almanac Novelty Teams.

 

Apparently there is one Ian left on AFL lists in 2019. Who might that be?

 

In this team there are also two ‘Blueys’, a ‘General’, a ‘Strop’ and an umpire whose hearing , muffled by a bad poodle perm, cost Collingwood the 1980 Escort Cup Grand Final ! Extra points for being able to identify the nicknames.

 

Peculiarly, there is an Ian who has represented 3 non-Victorian clubs in the AFL era.

 

Yes, when the Ians roamed in packs, cigarette advertising was hip. Anyhow, have a Winfield while you watch the Benson and Hedges World Series Cup.

 

Nowadays, ‘minor’ vices like alcohol and gambling are encouraged. Strange world.

 

 

I give you a team of the finest Ians. Over to you Knackers. Who would you nominate?

 

Suggestions from other sports and walks of life are also encouraged. Luke Reynolds, surely a decent cricketing IX of Ians beckons?

 

B: Ian Nankervis (Geel)                 Ian Fairley (NthM)               Ian Roberts (Syd)

 

HB: Ian Shelton (Ess)                      Ian Synman (StK)                  Ian Collins (Carl)

 

C: Ian Dunstan (Foot)                     Ian Stewart (StK/Rich)         Ian Robertson (Carl)

 

HF: Ian Hull (Rich)                           Ian Graham (Coll)                 Ian Cooper (StK)

 

F: Ian Paton (Haw)                          Ian Brewer (Coll)                    Ian Ridley (Melb)

 

Ruck: Ian Hampshire (Geel/Foot)Ian Bryant (Foot)                  Ian Law (Haw)

 

IC: Ian Cooper (Coll)      Ian Bremner (Haw)  Ian Miller (Fitz)        Ian Downsborough (WCE)

 

Coach: Ian Thorogood

 

Umpires: Ian Robinson, Ian Clayton, Ian Coates

 

Entertainment: Ian Dury and the Blockheads

 

 

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About Phillip Dimitriadis

Carer/Teacher/Writer. Author of Fandemic: Travels in Footy Mythology. World view influenced by Johnny Cash, Krishnamurti, Larry David, Toni Morrison and Billy Picken.

Comments

  1. Shelton and Hampshire are the two ‘Blueys’,

  2. Ian Paton the ‘General’ & Ian Cooper ‘Strop’

  3. Robert Douglas says:

    Surely Barry Ion gets a game?

  4. I was a Geelong fan in the era of Nankervis brothers & Ian Hampshire. Ian Lewtas was a team mate of their’s for a few seasons. He was another of the Geelong red heads.

    Ian Thompson played for South Melbourne around this period.

    Ian Low came down from Canberra to play for Footscray then ended up @ Victoria Park.I’m fairly sure he played in the 1980 GF. Phil you’re too young to remember Ian McCorist,who played for you blokes in the early 1970’s. He kicked 6 in a match against Fitzroy, then i’m pretty sure he came on TV that night wearing thongs.

    Glen!

  5. Luke Reynolds says:

    Nice team Phil!

    Ian McMullin was a favourite Magpie of mine as a kid, while this team’s greatest supporter would surely be St Kilda’s No.1 fan, Ian “Molly” Meldrum.

    The Test cricketing Ian XI-

    Ian Redpath (Australia)
    Ian Davis (Australia)
    Ian Chappell (Australia) (C)
    Ian Bell (England)
    Ian Craig (Australia)
    Ian Botham (England)
    Ian Johnson (Australia) (VC)
    Ian Healy (Australia) (WK)
    Ian Bishop (West Indies)
    Ian Meckiff (Australia)
    Ian Callen (Australia)

    12th man: Ian Smith (New Zealand)

    Umpires: Ian Robinson (Zimbabwe), Ian Gould (England)

    I’d pay good money to see Chappelli and IT Botham on the same team, even now.

    For the ODI’s, into the squad comes all-rounders Ian Harvey (Australia), Iain Butchart (Zimbabwe) and Ian Blackwell (England)

  6. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Ian Kroehn was an unspectacular but reliable full back for Centrals but met his match against Jezza and the Vics in 1973

    https://www.footyalmanac.com.au/south-australia-v-victoria-1973-nevermore/

    Ian McKay is best remembered for this mark in the 1952 SANFL Grand Final, but he was so much more that that.

    https://www.footyalmanac.com.au/the-ian-mckay-mark-sixty-years-on/

  7. Ian Aitken, formerly of radio station 5AA, would be the compere. From memory Aitken along with the late David Hookes did AA’s sports show until replaced by KG Cunningham. Ian Fairweather (of channel niners fame in the sixties over in good old SA)would be in charge of anything on the telly.

  8. Dave Brown says:

    Good one, LB. Ian’s one of those names – the more you look at it, the less it seems real.

    Ian Brewer also had a number of good seasons at Claremont and Norwood. Norwood’s most prolific Ian was Ian Stasinowsky – a robust full back in the ’70s across 150 games and well loved at the club.

  9. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Ian Daisy BallTearer Day, South Adelaide premiership rover and Channel 7 commentator for many years.

  10. Phillip Dimitriadis says:

    Great work Gerry. Nailed the nicknames. Two Blueys, a General and a Strop in the one team is rarefied air.

    Robert – Barry Ion just missed out on the team of Barrys. If his name was Ian Ion he’d be certainty.

    Glen ! – Don’t remember Ian Lewtas and as you say Ian McCorist had a blazing debut in 1972, well before my living memory. Ian Low was close. He kicked 4 goals in the 1980 First Semi against Carlton and did his bit to get us to the GF that year. Only 2 disposals in the GF and was no longer required thus.

    Luke – Brilliant work. Botham was one of my favourite cricketers when I used to watch cricket. He had the lair about him and could turn a game with bat, ball or in the field. Maybe he and Chappelli were too similar and that’s why they clashed. Both magnificent characters still talked about to this day.
    Ian McMullen is an interesting one. His debut year 1984 coincided with that of Darren Millane. McMullen kicked 5 goals in the 1984 Elimination against the Roys and looked like he could be anything. Came back in ’92 but was never the same. Influential figure in Magpie politics, though.

    Swish – Excellent SA noms. Ian Day used to commentate on the State of Origin matches and loved a good vowel stretch from memory, Plaaaatten !

    Fisho – An Ian Aitkin also played in the 1987 flag for Carlton and was KO’d by Clarko in the infamous ‘Battle of Britain’ at the Oval a couple of weeks later. Same bloke?

    Dave – Didn’t know Ian Brewer played in WA and SA. Was good enough to win the VFL Goal kicking in 1958 so must have had some talent. I’m always partial to a robust full back and it seems Stasinowski fits bill.

    A few more:
    Ian Herman (Carlton)
    Ian McRae (Fitzroy)
    Ian Kidgell (Brisbane)
    Ian Dargie (St Kilda and West Coast )

    Ian Moss super guitarist from Cold Chisel
    Ian Anderson (Jethro Tull) and Ian Curtis (Joy Division) unlucky not to score the entertainment gig.

  11. Ian Smith aka Harold (jelly belly) from Neighbours would make a good mascot for the team.

  12. Colin Ritchie says:

    Ian Marsh, winger from the Bombers during 70s. Could have been anything but a few too many injuries didn’t help his cause.

  13. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Ian ‘Rooster’ Wallace, West Torrens and Footscray was larger than life during the 70s, the Gary Glitter of the SANFL apparently

    https://www.footyalmanac.com.au/sanfl-70s-pen-pix-west-torrens-and-port-adelaide-1974-plus-bonus-achilles-jones-and-k-g/

  14. DBalassone says:

    He’s done it again. Super work PD. Another one of those names that is no more.
    It’s probably unfair but my memory of Ian Nankervis is seeing him watch on hoplessly as two of the greatest goals of all time were kicked against him in consecutive weeks in the 1981 2nd Semi and Preliminary Finals.

  15. Colin Ritchie says:

    What about a team of Graham/Graeme’s Phil? Another older name going/gone out of fashion.

  16. Ian Richardson has played 210 games for Claremont in the WAFL over the past 11 seasons. Raking left foot half forward who has kicked 403 goals.

  17. Ian “Sockeye” Salmon was a handy defender for Footscray in the early 70’s.

    Glen!

  18. Fisho, Harold is a mad keen, vociferous, dyed-in-the-wool Williamstown fan, is seen at nearly every Seagull game

  19. Swish, I always believed Ian Wallace to be a Scottish freedom fighter as portrayed by Mel Gibson in the film Braveheart – silly me. Also, at least 30 odd years ago, a certain Vietnam Vet, Ian Wallace was a bank officer with me. He was known as Wanker the Banker, and had little time for management but was popular with his work mates.

  20. McAlmanac says:

    No love for much maligned Adelaide Crow Ian Perrie.

  21. Phillip Dimitriadis says:

    Haha Fisho, Harold would be beauty of a mascot. He used to frequent the Preston Market before it became Hipsterville. Harold (Not Harry) is another name for consideration at some point.

    Colin – Saw Ian Marsh play twice in 1980 against the Pies wearing the number 37. He was quick and gathered over 25 touches in each outing. Bombers lost both encounters by 4 points. Graham/Graeme definitely one for the future. Should get some decent contenders in that team.

    Swish – Respect to anyone who carries the nickname ‘Rooster’.

    DB – It was a poor fortnight for Ian Nankervis and a bit rough to be remembered for being on the wrong end of heroics from Bosustow and Daicos. 315 games for the Cats over 17 years is a remarkable effort.

    PB – A current Ian is always healthy for footy. Handy goal tally, too.

    Glen ! You mean there was a ‘Sockeye’ before Paul Salmon?

    McAlmanac – Ian Perrie a good more recent nom, should be in ahead of Ian Graham. Had good seasons in 2003 and 2005.

    Somewhat ironically, the only ‘Ian’ on a current AFL list is GWS’s Ian Hill. Old name for the newest franchise.

  22. Good morning Phil.

    Ian “Sockeye’ Salmon was tall , snowy haired, defender/ruckman who came up from Gippsland in the early 1970’s.

    He played 113 games for Footscray his last being the 1976 Elimination Final defeat to Geelong.

    Footscray had a good group of talls in the early 70’s.

    Glen!

  23. G’day; again, Phil. Harold as a player name crossed my mind. I alluded to it on my 3/2 follow up to my Max posting.

    In recent times Harold Marin of Preston, who played one game with the Lions in 1968 is the primary Harold coming to mind.

    Whilst Ian is the primary topic here, i should mention Ian Payne played 45 games for Essendon between 1965-1971. He spent time away from Windy Hill, serving in the conflict in Vietnam.

    Glen!

  24. Phillip Dimitriadis says:

    Cheers Glen ! One of the main reasons I enjoy compiling these teams is the history lessons I get from yourself and other contributors. Next name due early next week.

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