AFL Round 2 – Collingwood v Melbourne: Magpies Made of Steele

by Danielle Eid

Let’s cut to the point shall we.

That was the worst I think I have seen these boys play, I mean seriously!

After last weeks performance I was excepting a big BANG! Something that would make me parade down my street with my flag.

I was wrong, very, very wrong.

As soon as the first quarter ended I wanted to cry.

Not because we were losing in general, but because we were losing TO MELBOURNE!

I wasn’t the only one who wasn’t happy, Mick did not look like he was about to hand out Easter eggs when he came down to gather the troops.

SPRAY EM MICK, MAKE THEM CRY!!!

Boy was I in a mood.

The second quarter brought better clearances, Travis Cloke got a goal which was good to see, and Lockyer sent the margin down to a point. There was a great passage of play which I loved where Steele Sidebottom did his ‘thang’ around the boundary all alone, sent it to Beam who passed it to Superman which ended with me singing a bit of Ricky Martin, HE BANGS, HE BANGS, through a goal that is. Steele, Dane and Jack what a hot combo that is. I think that would have to be my favorite play of the game. Then poor Johnson went down, which broke me heart. I mean, he had it tough with a leg injury, fought his way back into the senior side and now this! But what brought laughter was the fact that it took 3 Dees to bring down Big Trav Cloke, LOL.

This week I have to say that Superman was a bit better but I was still unhappy with the dropping of the marks! Put some glue on those gloves or something, just fix it!

Yes Superman is pretty but his effort this match was not near delicious. In fact I was so unimpressed that I think if I had been at the game I would have thrown myself from level 3!

Medders is kept to one goal, which is disappointing, but at least it was a pretty snap through the goals.

Petterd and Green were inspiring for the Dees and I didn’t like it one bit!

*bangs head on notebook*

SUPERMAN, MARK THE FREAKING FOOTY!! AHH BENCH HIM MICK, BENCH HIM!!!!!

FINALLY Superman goals= BREATHE

DAVIS!!! GOAL!! ONE POINT, ONE POINT!!!! OMG OMG!!!

“Don’t worry”, my uncle Jack said trying to calm me down, “Melbourne won’t win; they don’t know how to win.”

After this there are no other notes on my note book, I was stuck to the TV screen, my heart beating a thousand beats, then all I remember seeing is the ball in the Melbourne goal square, Ricky Petterd versus my new found poster boy, Steele Sidebottom, who does everything right to cause some sort of unbalance, a Melbourne mark dropped, Steele on his knees, siren.

My uncle Elie who had wandered into the room during this last minute was the victim of my excitement.

After numerous squeals of joy I jumped on my uncle, exclaiming “WE WON, WE WON!!”

He wasn’t impressed, thinking a Collingwood loss would suit him more, calling the Dees ‘losers’ in his dismay as I ran off to give the tongs to my grandfather so he could handle the barbie. On my way, happy as can be, I spotted the words ‘stainless steel’ on the tongs.

I thought of brave Steele in defence trying to do whatever he could to stop Petterd.

 I hugged the tongs in spirit of the moment; gee I must have looked like an idiot.

Collingwood   12. 14. 86

Melbourne       12. 13. 85