AFL Round 14 – Hawthorn v Brisbane: Tassie turns on Hawks

It may not have registered, as even a blip, on the Melbourne AFL Richter Scale with all the Jobe AOD-9604 stuff going on but over here we bi-cranials have much more significant contemporary issues to digest. The Hobart footy establishment was beating up on our Hawks. The confederate mongrels!

The diaper coloured front page headline in the local non confederate rag on the Saturday morning said it all. “Hawks boss slams Wade slur”. This is apparently code for – the Hawks are just a little bit grumpy over an ex player’s, and now AFL Tassie Grand Poo-bah’s, apparent insistence that a Melbourne based AFL team must play eight games each season in Tasmania, insisting that Hawthorn “did not add any value to our talent pathway”. We can’t even service our education and health needs over here yet now we are expected to foot the bill for life support for another of the AFL’s Melbourne business failures.

There would be few people fully familiar with this feline Phantom who would not be aware of my feelings for Hawthorn. That they, and their’s, ‘severely irritate me’ could be considered an extremely mild prognosis. But wait for it; it is my unequivocal belief that Hawthorn certainly have delivered to Tasmania. (Am I really saying this?)

Firstly, there’s the small matter of that flag they delivered to York Park during Jeff’s (ten year) 2008 dynasty (uuurrrg), continuous good performances at fortress Launceston, as well as a constant stream of players and resources graciously provided for doting young locals at grass roots development level.

There is cack yellow and poo brown everywhere down here. I am looking at it all around me at the moment as I stoically sit amongst three thousand of their more elite bloody (or is that Buddy) screaming fans in the (what was that forestry company’s name?) stand. Really, why would sensible grown-ups make poor trusting little ones dress like that? There should be a law against it.

They certainly have kept their part of the deal, so get a life Scott. Stop your continued stuffing football in Tasmania and respect the opinions of people north of Oatlands for a change, rather than just your own ego.

Right (breath in…….and out….. slowly……..again………) now I have that off my chest, I can deal with the matter at hand; Hawthorn vs Brisbane.

As I sit cocooned from the humming Hawk hype around me I reflect. For me, at least, this significantly will be the last time I get to see two great players in their current colours. Jonathon Brown and Lance Franklin. I briefly consider who was the best? It is of course a ‘lay down misere’, yet I doubt whether those around me who are soon to mourn the loss of one of their nearest and dearest to another tribe, as we of the Cat clan did, would agree.

After an uninspiring start the home side, as expected, get greedy, treat the ball as their own and skip away to a ten goal win after six unanswered third quarter goals. Poor conversion may well have kept the margin below three figures. Their spread and delivery to mobile or strategically placed options is outstanding.

They are ruthlessly business like in their quest for four points that will just about assure them a high top four spot as well as equalling their club record of twelve straight wins. They play like worthy flag favourites.

Their usual York Park scoring suspects, Franklin, Roughead, Breust and Savage (they seem to always be dangerous when I am there) were amongst the goals but Brian Lake certainly makes his presence felt as a key defender. Could he be the key to the door that was cruelly slammed in their faces in the dying moments of last year’s grand final?

Lion King Brown kicked four goals and is still effective when the ball is delivered directly to his big mits but he now lacks the youth which enabled him to prowl the forward line and kill at will. Daniel Rich’s blond hair was prominent bobbing around, journeyman Brent Maloney was a hard nut in and around stoppages and Matthew Leuenberger as always contributed but the Lions are just not quite there at this time.

Finally if anyone doubts the success of the Hawthorn assimilation into the northern part of Tasmania they have no eye for either detail, or history. If any sceptics feel that Hawthorn have not been able to win the hearts and minds of the locals they haven’t heard the chant when the home side take control of a game, or been drawn into the lava flow of gold and brown as it relentlessly oozes down the steps, past the merchandise concessions, through the gates of their home ground and out onto the local streets.


Hawthorn : 3.8    8.9   15.15    21.17 (143)

Brisbane:    1.2    5.5     7.7      12.13  (85)

Goals: Hawthorn: L. Franklin, J. Roughead 4; L. Breust, S. Savage 3; D. Hale, B. Hill, J. Gunston, J. Lewis, L. Shiels, J. Simpkin. Brisbane: J. Brown 4: M. Golby 2; S. Black, P. Hanley, J. Lisle, D. Rich, T. Rockliff, E. Yeo.                                                                      Best: Hawthorn: B. Lake, S. Mitchell, L. Breust, B. Sewell, I. Smith, L. Franklin.  Brisbane: D. Rich, B. Moloney, J. Brown, M. Leuenberger, P. Hanley.                           Crowd: 15,796 . Umpires: Jason Armstrong; Scott Jeffery, Leigh Fisher.

Malarkey Medal Votes: B. Lake (Haw) 3, D. Rich (Bris) 2, S. Mitchell (Haw) 1.


  1. Well put Phanto. I know how much it must have drawn down on your Vandemonian loyalties to turn a fellow Double Header, but the truth must be outed. The Hawks have upheld their end of the bargain. i just wish punt Road had been in a position to jump back across to the Spiritual Homeland and play three or four games as The Tasmanian Tigers. In fact I’d move the whole show across for exclusive use of the Taswegian playing pool.

    While I’ve got you there, how comfortable are you about extending the Kennet Curse into September? The Maybloom Faithful are already talking about Round XIV’s defeat as the loss they had to have – that hoodoos are made to be broken. But the one I like best is straight from the Tony Abbott song book — the only result that counts is the one on TLSIS .

    How’s the Brudder holding up under the strain of success?

  2. Peter Fuller says

    May I respectfully dissent – at least on the basis of the evidence you advance. The fact that Hawthorn have secured the allegiance of many Tasmanians is unsurprising. It is what any efficient exploitative carpetbagger (imperialist?) will accomplish. What did the 2008 flag really provide, materially or psychologically for Tasmanians? (I think that it’s selfless of you to think that occasion of infamy – from a Geelong perspective – had any saving grace.)
    How does the Tasmanian Government’s deal with the Hawks measure up in cost-benefit terms?
    Other than a modest boost to tourism on match days, does the sponsorship provide any appreciable increase in tourism at other times, or any other economic benefit?
    Surely Wade is correct to argue for an eight match visitor as a minimum justification for Tasmanian taxpayers’ contribution.
    I don’t pretend any detailed knowledge of the financial agreement, and I acknowledge that all Governments fudge the details of costs-benefits associated with sporting (and other) events, right up to Olympic Games or soccer World Cups. However, I genuinely wonder what he Hawthorn deal delivers for Tassie.

  3. Mark Doyle says

    The comments about Scott Wade’s comments are nothing more than parochial nonsense.
    The real issue is that there are six Melbourne based AFL teams which are not financially viable and they rely on extra dividends from the AFL Commission plus state government sponsorships and grants to survive in the AFL. I believe that most of these state government sponsorships and grants do not provide sustainable long term economic benefits. These sponsorships and grants are a huge con by the poiticians, the AFL Commission and club administrators on the local communities and football supporters.
    The clubs that have benefited most from these sponsorships and grants are Hawthorn, Collingwood and Geelong. The state government sponsorships and grants plus extra AFL Commission dividends provided to garbage clubs such as the Western Bulldogs, Melbourne, St. Kilda and North Melbourne have been a waste of money.

  4. Good to hear your curmudgeonly voice, Phanto. Have you got yourself a Scratcher Neal “Wynyard Spud Farmer” T Shirt?
    Recommended for all Almanac gentlemen of a certain age. If your heart doesn’t sing for the Hoops, there is always a Bones McGhie for Mr Wrap. Vin Catoggio to cool Litza and JB’s fevered brow. Geoff Blethyn one-eyed specs for the Flying Peptides fanciers. Or a Peter Bedford for a purist like myself.
    Can you give us an update on the Wynyard Cats season to date Phanto? Now that the Black Prince has gone to the Magoos, has Phanto Junior continued to step up?
    Or does lightning only strike once?

  5. Thanks for the plug Peter_B! Get them while they’re hot. PS if anyone has contact details for Scratcher Neal please drop me a line at [email protected] as I have to give him a ring to get his blessing for the garment.

  6. There you are folks, if you continue to dangle the same old bait you eventually catch the fish you want. MD has now been sprung as an alter ego of Scott Wade. In hindsight it is so obvious. How silly of us all.
    No lateral thinking of funny bone there, just humbug.
    Phantoms eventually get to the truth and know many thing.

Leave a Comment