2013 Grand Final Entertainment

Found this windblown piece of paper pressed up against a cow in a tree somewhere in the Docklands:

“Possible Lineup 2013 Grand Final Entertainment”

Neil Young – The Needle and the Damage Done  (AD – too obvious)

Roxy Music – I Love The Drugs (AD – see above)

The Verve – The Drugs Don’t Work (AD – too contemporary)

(AD) – How about we rebadge some old Aussie favourites ?

The Peptides (Riptides)

AOD9604 (MEO245)

Johnny Diesel and The Injectors (no change required)

(Paul Kelly and) The High Rise Bombers (ditto)

or those cute English girls ASADArama ?

Or how about some video tributes

Lionel Rose – I Dank You

Bob Dylan – Subcutaneous Homesick Blues

The Band – The Weight

Joe Tex – Ain’t Gonna Bump No More (With No Big Fat Bombers)

The Beatles – I Should Have Known Better

The Ramones (et al) – Needles and Pins

Or anything by

The Chemical Brothers

or Needle Diamond

stuff it, what’s Meat Loaf’s number again ?




About Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt

Saw my first SANFL game in 1967 - Dogs v Peckers. Have only ever seen the Dogs win 1 final in the flesh (1972 1st Semi) Mediocre forward pocket for the AUFC Blacks (1982-89) Life member - Ormond Netball Club -That's me on the right


  1. Malcolm Ashwood says

    Great Stuff Swish I reckon about 2046 the jokes about Essendrugs wii finish
    Go the Blacks the write up above about you should include Nippy Forward Pocket

  2. Mark, edit the biog. I reckon I was at that Prelim – Centrals lost to Port after starting promisingly. The Casserley/Haughan/Morey etc team.

  3. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    Thanks Crio, dumb typo on my behalf, that game was one that got away

  4. Robin Grow says

    why not have the Essendon team singing the club song – you know the one that starts – See the Bombers shoot up, up!

  5. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    Found a second piece of paper woth more AD suggestions

    Hendrix – Hey Jobe

    Needle Diamond could do Sweet Caro-line

    Morrissey – Interesting Drug

    Go-Betweens – Apology Accepted

    Split Enz – My Mistake

    Wonder if we could get Simply Redacted to come over as well ?

  6. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    And it least it is comforting to know that they won’t resort to another rendition of “Holy Grail”, as the AFL would surely have enough imagination ot not go down that well trodden path, wouldn’t they.

    I’d bring back the 1982 pre-game entertainment …

  7. Maybe James and friends could do a rendition of “I fought the law and the law won”

  8. For older Almanackers attending the GF:
    The Beatles – A Day in the Life (aka ‘Danks theme’). I read the news today, oh boy….I’d love to tuurrrn yoouu onnnn….
    Bob Hope – Danks for the memory
    Buddy Holly – I guess it doesn’t matter anymore

Leave a Comment