2013 End of Year Sale and Gift List

 

 

Giving

James Hird and the Essendon Football Club. Has there been a greater display of arrogance and denial in sport this year, this decade, culminating in the front door bleating by Hird’s wife. Spare me the crocodile tears Tania. Your husband is a sook and clearly has a well honed ability to externalise blame with the conviction of Catholic priest, with apologies to Father James. Oh and don’t expect a Christmas card from Dr Bruce.

 

Buying/Giving

Carlton is buying any one or anything that isn’t nailed down at the Datsun 120Y Centre. I am selling them back as the only good thing that could come out of Collingwood is Princes St.

 

Buying

The Spring Carnival and multis that got up on 3 from 5 days

 

Giving

Most likely my shirt when I attempt to replicate the feat in Autumn in Sydney

 

Buying

Mitchell Johnson’s spell in the 2^nd innings in Adelaide. I very much doubt that young Mitch has a clue why he is bowling so well and he still has a look in his eye that he could lose the plot in a second and belt Broad. That said, his spell in the Adelaide was a ripper and had the soap dodgers clearly shitting themselves.

 

Giving

Gerard Whateley. I know, a friend of the Almanac community, but really, he has become more omnipresent that Eddie McGuire. How can any person with a shred of an creditability work with Robbo. Bringing out a revised edition of his Black Caviar book was a clear indication of his desire to join the Channel Nine commentary team, and taking over as host of Offsiders represents a clear conflict of interest. Having a Geelong supporter in charge goes against the ABC charter of responsibility. Sorry, I forgot that Barry Cassidy barracked for Collingwood. Knock your self out Gerard.

 

Buying

The Gnat’s forward line. Boyd, Cameron and Patton. All the best containing those three in a couple of years.

 

Giving

Kevin Sheedy. Great salesman, silly old man.

 

Giving

Robbie Griffith. Trainer to the stars, read Almanac Racing, who blamed another jockey, on another horse, for not chasing hard enough, resulting in our horse having to try and make up the ground without cover. Sorry Robbie, I would have though that our monkey might have realised that letting a leader get out to 12 lengths was never a great idea. PLUS I don’t give shit if the horse is happy. If I wanted to throw money at a happy horse, I would go on a merry go round.

 

Buying

Eight Grand Boy to break it’s maiden on Monday and Robbie to send a glowing report on Tuesday.

 

Buying

The Bullies end of season. Please let it be a sign the Footscray can win a flag

 

Giving

Saints. Def. Dysfunctional, inept collective of former contenders. Collective noun, Milnes

 

Buying

Freo. Great effort in getting to the GF and a good season after that other Essendon flog led you into the wilderness. Even better that Hayden Ballantyne was an abysmal failure of the day. Matthew Pavlich, I salute you.

 

Giving

The usual suspects. Umpires, video reviews, the Rules Committee, MRP, UMPIRES. Basically anyone who has made a decision in relation the how football is played and refuses to admit that those decisions are patently stupid and devoid of rationality.

 

Buying

The Almanac community, in particular, Dips and the wonderful Kate. Thank you for allowing us in to your lives.