Your local footy club’s best side in 2016



Backs                            Pizzle   Gut    Dogga

Half Backs                 Blue Buckets   Slug

Centre                        Nobby Squid   Stevo

Half Forwards           Chook Showbag Fitzy

Forwards                   Froggy Butch  Snow

Ruck                           Bones  Blacky Skeeta

Int                                Barney Doc Davo


Here’s two of those Coodabeens sides that Smokie refers to in the comments. (From their Big Bumper Footy Book – Penguin Books 1990)





See other “best sides for 2016” (including Geelong, Collingwood, Hawthorn, Sydney, North Melbourne, Adelaide, Richmond).

About Mickey Randall

The Sportswriter, Revolver, Lebowski. Met the girl when we were thirteen. Married her last year.


  1. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    Funnily enough, I don’t think any of these nicknames have been used at the Blacks

  2. Very pleased to see Skeeta in there Mickey. And a Blue.

    I would add Tiny which you hear less Down South. But quite a few genuinely big blokes Up North are called Tiny. Potential Tiny’s at the moment – Mumford, Sandilands, D. Simpson. Tiny’s are often gentle.

    Boof gets a run in the seconds..

  3. Crazy and Macca to bring their boots ‘just in case’.

  4. Neil Anderson says

    Possible team to take on Mickey’s team at least for a decent punch-up:

    Nugget Black-Dog Chilla

    Bobby Laurie Maurie

    Robbo Ando Simmo

    Horse Snake (of course) Donga

    Whippa Knackers Gordo

    Int: Gazza Bazza Muzza

  5. Malcolm Ashwood says

    Spot on Swish way to obvious for the blacks great stuff,Mickey

  6. What – no Teaspoon? Time to check out some early Almanac Gold with the Roosters (Lawrence Mooney, Sam Pang et al).
    Check out the Player Profiles – “Doc” looks strangely familiar.
    Played Mickey.

  7. Trucker Slim says

    Love it Mickey!

    Surely there’s a spot for Kwai Chang? Growing up in the ’70s (and Kung Fu being a very popular TV show of the time) that was my nickname at the local footy club. I played with Jeff Hunter (Ken Hunter’s brother) and he was as thin as a spindle. Hence his nickname.

    A small joy watching my daughter’s U18s footy team is listening to the coach call out nicknames when addressing the side at Quarter time.


  8. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    Grasshopper Slim?

  9. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    What’s this about the backs at the top? Very un-South Australian

  10. Where’s Robbo??

  11. Excellent, Mickey.

    This reminds me of when the Coodabeens – back in the day – would have a team of the week.
    On one such week, the task was to pick a team to beat all teams. The winning entry went along
    the following lines:
    the nuggety back-pocket the solid defender minds the resting ruck
    etc etc
    Maybe Swish remembers ?

  12. Aussie gus says

    Missed a few obvious ones

    Chuck. (Usually bestowed at pre season or trip away time)

    One of the best I played with was Raffles. It either meant he had tickets on himself or he refused to sell his allocation !

  13. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says


    Please see above.

  14. Ha ha, that’s it.
    I clearly remember the centre-man being called “the pivot”.

  15. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    Aussie Gus

    When David Twomey left Collingwood for West Adelaide, he was given the epithet “Tickets” by those at Milner Road

  16. Thanks everyone.

    Swish- good point on the format of the teamsheet. Of course it’s forwards down to backs although I had a couple coaches who did the opposite on a blackboard. Like the direction horses race I’d be surprised if it was consistent across the nation.

    JTH- we’ve all played with a Skeeta and a Blue. Agree that Tiny seems rarer down here.

    Thanks Jeff. Macca is among the first picked.

    Neil- love your interchange. Every Muzza is a backman.

    Malcolm. The Blacks are in an alternate universe for nicknames.

    Peter B- that’s a good website but there’s a worrying lack of “Shawshank Redemption ” on the player profiles.

    Thanks Rick. Are the nicknames in women’s footy taken from a similar reservoir to men’s ?

    Dips- Robbo did a knee during cricket season ( carrying a keg to a BBQ) and will come back through the reserves.

    Thanks Smokie. The Coodabeens Bumper Footy Book is still on my shelf

    Gus’- as always selection headaches aplenty.

    Thanks again.

  17. Mathilde de Hauteclocque says

    I’m using ‘workface’ in 2016.
    ‘Sydney’s workface dominated after the second quarter to bring the Swans to within …’

    And getting the mob to think of something better than ‘mum.’

  18. I understand the need for inclusivity and how this is behind the use of “group” in team contexts, but I cringe every time.

    Be sure to update us on any progress with the “mum” replacement.

    Thanks Mathilde.

  19. Luke Reynolds says

    Brilliant Mickey.

    Spud, Crackers, Knackers, Digger and Shags/Shagger no doubt playing well in the twos.

    And I’m beginning to think every team needs a “Rulebook”….

  20. Thanks Luke. Most of those lads knocking on the door. Especially Shagger.

    Everyone needs to know a Shagger.

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