Third Test – Day 4: Thoughts from the twitterverse

My wife, @Mady77Rezz, told me recently that journalists don’t have to interview people anymore, they just seem to place tweets from someone’s twitter account.

There was an article in The Age that had done just that. This is not lazy. This is Social Media.

This bothered me, until I thought, what the hell, I’ll give it a try. You never know, if the editors of the nation’s dailies see my piece, I may be offered a job to cut and paste from other people’s twitter accounts full time.

The timing was perfect. I didn’t catch much of the final day of the Third Test and yet I was due to file a report. In the olden days, all of 15 years ago, I would have had to speak to someone and ask their impressions of the game. I would then formulate a report. Not anymore.

I’ll type in the names of the Australian team and their views from the game will be there, ripe for my plagiarism, sorry, journalism. This shouldn’t be too hard or take too long, and that’s the main thing.

Michael Clarke hasn’t tweeted since December 27 so nothing from the captain.

David Warner is in a slanging match with a troll. No, it’s not M.Doyle.

Nothing from Graeme Wood Ed Cowan but then he hasn’t had much to tweet about after his recent time at the crease. He does seem to inspire many unflattering comments from the twitterati. He is stoutly defended by those on twitter older than 35 (led by @rdhinds) who love watching a “real opener” at the crease and will defend their right to do so.

Phillip Hughes doesn’t seem to have a twitter account. He must be happy for his bat to do the talking – against Sri Lanka, of course.

No twitter account for Michael Hussey – that’s so old school. Respect.

No account for Matthew Wade either. Sensible decision, who needs 10,000 messages reminding you that you can’t keep at Test standard?

No twitter account for Mitchell Johnson. Again, no surprises – not going to be too many complementary messages there, least of all from his mother.

Peter Siddle. No account, a man’s man, but then he is a vegan. How are we meant to feel? It’s very confusing.

A good solid quote from Nathan Lyon:  “Great win for Aus!! #serieswin!!” Mind you, it was posted after the second test, but it’s better than nothing. Without this, I’d have to, you know, call someone.

Nothing from Mitch Starc: You’d think he’d need all the support he could get. Nothing from Jackson Bird either, but I have a feeling he’ll be fine.

So, after 11 minutes of work, I can report that Nathan Lyon has declared the Second Test rout a “Great win for Australia!!” and that he is happy with the “series win”.


About Stephen Cooke

Cumbersome ruckman of the garden variety


  1. @dips64lunatic – “I got up, went to the loo and had a shave today. Gr8 win by the Aussies.”

  2. Dips, can I quote you on that? (Why am I even asking – it’s in the public domain, so it’s up for grabs.)

  3. Phillip Hughes once had a Twitter account – I think he may have announced being dropped from the XI on it before a public announcement was made.

    Michael Hussey had one also, although it soon became apparent he had a ghost-tweeter after one of his tweets appeared when he was walking back to the pavilion.

    The fake Nathan Hauritz twitter account is perhaps the best of all cricketers…

  4. Litza, I remember that about Hughes. Would love to know what the Hussey tweet was when walking from pavilion – “shit decision from ump” would be gold. Although I’m guessing it was something like “Feeling good on Swisse.”

    Highly recommend @gradecricketer to everyone. Very funny.

  5. Lovely work, Cookie. I noticed that Nine was using social media to try and select a nickname for Jackson Bird. But there were only 5 choices, none of them much chop.

    I think they missed an obvious one. Joel Garner was “Big Bird”, so Jackson Bird should surely be “Big Garner”.

  6. Very funny stuff

  7. Listened to a bit while manning BBQ stand. Stop. For daughter’s netball team. Stop. At Masters. Stop. It’s a hardware joint. Stop. Onions cooked well. Stop. Watched last 20 minutes. Stop. I saw Hussey steal a wicket. Stop. Entertaining. Stop.

  8. Pamela Sherpa says

    Wondering if perhaps some wise old fuddy duddy of a person has advised this younger lot that if they “Don’t have anything sensible, informative, interesting or intelligent to say , then don’t say anything at all.”

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