Standin’ on the Outside Lookin’ in – Post Round 3


Round 3 of the footy is over and things have never been more clearer in terms of where the year is heading. The gurus at HQ must have a team of speech writers working around the clock producing press releases that do not contain the terms “equalisation” and “compromised” as the competition has not been so unequal and compromised for 3 decades. The season has turned in a football version of a spaghetti western, as in The Good, The Bad and the Ugly. Clearly the Blues, Weagles and Hawks are the form sides at this juncture but I’ll save judgment on a few others until they have played teams containing more than witch’s hats. A great result for the mercenaries from Arden St last Sunday confirms what we have also suspected. Brad Scott is the dominant sibling and got the first feed as a youngster. The Pies apparently didn’t go too well last Friday but that is a mere blip on what is radar filled with more flashing dots than the screens at Tullamarine Flight Control. The Malthouse Syndrome has become fatal and taking victims by the minute.

The words flag and favourite have not been used in the same sentence for quite some time at Princes Park but your correspondent is not getting ahead of himself. I’m taking it one flag at a time, which is sage advice for a certain other group of supporters. No talk of dynasties here. However, I must admit, I’ve dreamt about standing on the dais at the All Nations Hotel on Grand Final eve, raising my scarf and screaming, “Dave Nadal, you were wrong”. Still a team’s fortune is a mere ACL or grade 3 hammie away from disaster so no counting the poultry just yet, only the ones in battery farms.

What would Mike have Written?

Most likely more columns than a Greek temple in regard to ongoing “tension“ at Maggie World. Seriously, give Mick his bat and ball, give Eddie another TV show and build a bridge. Why is it that the media feels that every person in the world has an interest in the goings on at Collingwood and the he said, I said, my mum said, gibbering that has been trotted out this week? It must be a tough sand pit at the Datsun 200B Centre. Who would have thought that the Buckley boy would be the only one to show some dignity? It’s taken some 40 years for it to happen but at least someone has put the thing in perspective. The Pies have lots of injures, got belted by the evil empire and have a new coach who took over from a bitter ex coach with an outdated game plan. End of story. Move on people, there are another 17 teams out there, many of which are hemorrhaging and in urgent need of attention.

Tony’s Tip of the Week

Those of you who are fans of animated films with deep messages about “the circle of life” will no doubt see the poignancy of my experience this morning in the shower (yes Pamela the same, recently renovated, faux slate masterpiece). A Huntsman had taken up residence in recent weeks making for fine company as I went about my ablutions. This morning it lay motionless. Dead as a donger. My pangs of sorrows where however soon replaced with joy as I spotted a tiny little replica struggling to gain traction of the wet floor. A tiny spider making its’ first tentative adventure in the world which is my bathroom. Wonderful stuff. Well it was until I moved my foot and washed in down the drain. Shit happens Mick.

Tony’s Weekly Dump

While I pine for the sporting and culinary life of the H of S, it does give me some relief not be a resident there at Easter time. It stiff baffles me that some 2000 years after the death of a bloke who played up forward for the Nazareth Apostles, that the time may have come for say, Lindsey Fox, to write a decent size cheque to the Children’s Hospital and put on a game of footie on Good Friday. Why does the AFL cling to the dated concept that several million people having some fun watching a game of footie does not constitute an attack on the Vatican? Having lived through what seemed like several hundred telethons as a teenager; I can see the that having to suffer and feel pangs of guilt for our vices has some merit. But surely paying $50 per kg per prawns and snapper should be enough penance for everyone. Blues v Pies. Nothing better than a good Catho v Prodo stoush. Make it happen Andrew.

See ya’ later

About Tony Robb

A life long Blues supporter of 49 years who has seen some light at the end of the tunnel that isn't Mick Malthouse driving a train.


  1. Pamela Sherpa says

    I was going to ask how the new bathroom was going Tony. A harmless Huntsman is merely a warning sign. It’s the invasion of redbacks on Saturday afternoon that you should be really worried about.

  2. I wouldn’t worry about Huntsmen, Tony. After lthe ast week’s triumphalism, I understand the Floreat Pica society is arranging a plague of tarantula’s and taipans to visit the Robb residence. At least you’ll go happy. Cheers.

  3. Tony Robb says

    bring it on Pam bring it on
    Peter, I’ve been a little tough on the Pies faithful and will now take a back seat but gee the trip up the front has been fun the past week. Still the genuine passion of a dedicated Collingwood fan is to be admired They surely invented siege mentality

  4. watt price tully says

    Can someone please direct me to where I could find a definition of “smug” – I’m sure it’s around here somewhere.

    While looking for the defintion of smug, someone else trying to assist me in the definion of the word uttered something that sounded like goat, residing nearby I’m advised.

  5. Dave Nadel says

    If I’m going to appear in your fantasies Tony, you could at least get my name right. Nadal is a Spanish bloke who plays tennis rather well, Nadel is a Collingwood supporter who writes about football.

  6. Tony Robb says

    WPT don’t be so precious I can handle Dave having a go as at least he has some runs on the board by way of regular contributions to the site . That takes time and makes it what it is. You unfortunately are a sniper. So why not make an effort to write something. Its rather satisfying and provides more value than cheap shots from the bleaches
    my apologies Dave but I’ve always wanted to give the tennis bloke a serve, pun intended
    Enjoy the game against the othe Pies

  7. watt price tully says

    Dear Tony, you’re right, I havent wriiten something yet but will defend my Pies against Blues triuphalism that was so prevalent last week.

    Got stuck in my craw whatever a craw is. Hopefully soon I will write something – I’ve not long joined the site butwhat you say is true to soke extent I am not aa regualr a reader as I would like & will soon start to write (I hope).

    Love & kisses.

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