Standin’ on the Outside Lookin’ In

It s been some time since I’ve written a piece and some les than charitable people have suggested that I’m in hiding. Nothing could be further than the truth. Simply been a bit busy with work and family matters, that’s all. I mean who cares about other stuff like footy and how the Blues have been struggling finding form or a forward or a back line or an effective ruckman or effective anything for that matter. Ratts has been under the pump I know but I feel the influences of ex-Collingwood players in the assistant coaching role may be a concern. I was never totally convinced about Gavin Brown motives coming over from the Pies, particularly as he still has a reserved parking spot at the Lexus Centre. Anyway, I’m sure thing will sort themselves out in the traditional Carlton way. Sack everyone with a pulse and have a ding dong shit fight at Board level.
Anyway, enough of such trivial things. The Belconnen Under 16s coaching panel will be in town this weekend for the annual mid season review and we cant wait to get amongst the action in the H of S. What with the Melbourne Storm sitting on top of the ladder and the Vixen’s flying it promises to be a ripper weekend. The boys and I will be staying right on Jollimont Rd, within spitting distance of AAMI Stadium and the netball centre. We might even take a few sights such as Captain Cook Cottage and have a light ale at the North Fitzroy Arms with Mr Harms on Friday night as there is nothing else on from memory. Or is late night shopping on Friday nights in Victoria? Can’t ever have enough moccasins and I think that Dimmey’s in Footscray is the only remaining place on the planet that still sells them. Mind you they don’t sell as well since Danny Southern retired. Yep, can’t wait. We might even pop in a three quarter time for the Tigers V Dees match. They still let you in for free at three quarter time don’t they because heaven forbid we might pay to watch the football being served up this season. I’m also signing up for twitter account just for the weekend so I can interact with lots of really popular people such as Brock McLean. It should be a hoot all that social networking stuff.
You’ve Been Verbaled By Mick.
The budget at RSN Sport continues to be slashed leaving Mick McGuane and Chrisso as lone soldiers most of the time. The regular “experts” have been replaced by bits from Adam White and a guest role from Barry Hall on Fridays. While I have been a bit harsh on Mick in the past, I can only say it is pure genius on Mick’s behalf having Big Bad across the desk. Mick sounds great, even smart, compared the Bazza, whose increased media exposure is mystifying. I can only assume that the execs at Fox are waiting for Barry to fly of the handle a belt Robbo. Now that would be good tele. While Mick continues to do things to the English language that defy the law of physics, at least he actually does some research prior to interviewing sports people from non mainstream sports. Possibly something a few of his colleagues might like to try rather than “shooting from the hip” like, say Dermie, who has taken commentary to a zone once reserved for special needs groups.
Tip of the Week
When you think you have broken the code of getting into the minds of 16 year old footballers, think again. Those of us with teenage children know that puberty does play havoc with the concentration and motivation of growing adolescents. However, take that hormonal dichotomy onto a football field and what you have is psychological profile worthy of a thesis. The lad that was jumping out of his skin on Thursday night turns up on Saturday in his pyjamas, without his boots. Your gun mid fielder from last week sooks down in the forward line because Jade from his PE class dropped him for another bloke that plays soccer. Your entire backline are glacial in their attack on the ball after an allnighter playing Call of Duty. Yep, it’s a mystery and funnily enough nothing seems to change much once they start playing senior football.
Tony’s Weekly Dump
Now it would be easy to take aim at the Carlton Football Club and their ineptitude over the past two months. However, I’ll leave that to the 2067 accredited footballer journos and a significant amount of Collingwood supporters who seem to have remembered a few optimistic comments from your correspondent after round 3. No, my gripe is bigger than the Blues downward spiral. It’s football itself. It basically shite and not worth watching. While it was expected that the new teams would struggle to compete, what wasn’t expected that half the league as just as bad and, as last weekend round showed, the comp is in strife for some time to come. While some will deride my call about the death of the game, I defy anyone to name ten games that have actually been good this year. The Saint v Tigers game was a beauty but was poo pooed by an assistant coach who was unhappy with the lack of defensive pressure and openness of play. Stuff off mate. You care about nothing more than winning at any price and absolutely jack shit about the punters paying your over inflated wage. Look out if that price is empty seats and decrease subscriptions.
See ya later

About Tony Robb

A life long Blues supporter of 49 years who has seen some light at the end of the tunnel that isn't Mick Malthouse driving a train.


  1. Dear Tony, loved your take on adolescents, made me laugh with knowledge and experience of three of them, the last finishing Year 12 now. It is a ride. And your connection between Adolescents and Footballs is actually very insightful. As for Carlton, perhaps if like Ratten said today, he just ignores the papers and the press, and concentrates on the task at hand, we’ll all get through another day. Perhaps 80% of the teams ie any not in the top four, need to do the same….

    Thanks for the read


  2. pamela sherpa says

    Glad to hear those teenagers are keeping you on your toes Tony.
    Re game style- Yeah, isn’t it amusing that with all the extra experts clubs have for this that and the other the game at the elite level often resembles an under 13 soccer match. Almost laughable when one forward gets the ball and has to go it alone bouncing the ball like a basketballer on a fast break. I wonder if this will change come finals time. Enjoy your weekend in Melb.

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