Sausage Roll Review: LRB plays the Dulwich Bakery, Glenelg South

 

At noon I remember my quest: to eat this country’s finest sausage roll. The two proximate bakeries offer products of middling quality like Little River Band’s 1978 album Sleeper Catcher which after the hit single “Lady,” falls away dispiritingly.

 

The Dulwich bakery began in Adelaide’s eastern suburbs (yes, in Dulwich) and has since expanded like the belly of the man who ate all the pies and now there’s one in Glenelg South too.

 

Heading along Partridge Street I pass a school where it’s also lunchtime and I see all the straw-hatted girls, all eating entitled food, all named Charlotte.

 

Gliding through the roundabout near the Broadway pub and despite being a modest Korean model, my car issues a little automotive whimper as I cruelly ignore the lure of beer garden refreshment and carry on.

 

Outside the bakery are shiny nubs of metal tables and chairs while inside are wooden booths, and my sausage roll, having been, “plated up” as Gordon Ramsey might bark, I take a quiet corner.

 

I have a bite.

 

Food and memory are coupled. Fish and chips on the breezy foreshore; a bucket of undrinkable coffee in an airport dawn; the languid schnitzel in a wine valley pub.

 

Sausage rolls speak of the past. Even if you trot out after reading this and buy one, I reckon you’re time-travelling to your childhood. They live in a black and white era when you were small and the world was unthinkably big. Sausage rolls, home-made with fork marks sealing the pastry, at a primary school birthday, when the fun was unscripted and there was running, lots of aimless, skun-knees running.

 

Today, the pastry is tasty and of a welcoming texture. It avoids the twin evils of being greasy and soggy or dry and flaky. A bright opening like, “Help Is On Its Way” the first song on Diamantina Cocktail. 1978 was a great year for LRB and for sausage rolls.

 

The filling is a pleasure: warm, with a suggestion of spice and pepper and showing a brownish, beefy hue unlike the Barbie pink of other sausage rolls loitering within this postcode. Various lunch punters come and go; variously corporate, high-vis, matronly, harried parent.

 

If I applied the Pitchfork (an alternative music website) album review metric I’d give my sausage roll an 8.3.

 

And with my lunch now commencing its growling digestive journey I considered my good fortune on this autumnal afternoon. I had the three essentials for a happy existence: something to do; something to look forward to; someone to love.

 

If peak Little River Band is the full version of, “It’s A Long Way There” the first song from their eponymous album, then while the Dulwich bakery release is excellent, I’ve not yet located the sausage roll equivalent.

 

My quest continues.

 

 

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About Mickey Randall

Favourite film: The Shawshank Redemption Favourite song: Khe Sahn Favourite holiday destination: Gold Coast Favourite food: steak Favourite beer: VB Best player seen: Dogga Worst player seen: Frogga Last score on beep test: 3.14159 Favourite minor character in Joyce’s Ulysses: Punch Costello

Comments

  1. John Butler says

    You don’t get this in Epicure.

    And that’s Epicure’s loss. :)

  2. Thanks JB. I’d like to imagine that in halcyon days of magazine publishing there was a Sausage Roll Monthly, both Australian and international versions.

  3. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    Mickey, I’ve only ever jumped into print twice with a musical related riposte, but you’ve given me a reason to make that three. The first was in response to The Advertiser’s lukewarm review of Skyhooks’ In The Heat Of The Night tour’s Memorial Drive concert late in 1975. It might have been Greg Kelton to feel the searing burn of my 15yo rapier wit, but maybe they’d sent Boti Nagy, anyway I gave them what for. Next up was my shattering takedown of Disco in an early 1979 edition of On Dit, where I attempted to lambast the satin-flared, Wella Imperial Balsam using (sorry Dave Warner) writers who got stuck into my preferred Punk (or was it New Wave by then?).

    But today’s LRB flashback has really got me narkier than something very narky. I was ideologically obliged to despise LRB’s Aussie take on smooth easy listening, their bleating about the Las Vegas Hilton no match for the Hooks’ Is This America? for example. They were only surpassed in the Oz schlock rock stakes by Air Supply (the Silver Studs with better teeth), who I sneered at one night at the Tivoli on a February Tuesday night when the Hooks were in their death throes (even before Hot For The Orient). LRB were shit.

    But then I remembered that I am also obliged to defend Elizabeth’s Glen Shorrock, his work with The Twilights and Axiom (despite the latter’s faux American leanings) not to be forgotten. (His hosting of the early years of Rock Arena shall go unspoken). Even old mate Bertlekamp, who may have shared a Nissen Hut with Barnesy, had his moments. And Derek Pellici wore a Swans jumper on Countdown. I’m so conflicted.

    So with the benefit of four decades of hindsight, I’m left with only one question. Why didn’t you lead with Cheetah instead?

  4. Great read Mickey. My mum always used the lesser known shortcrust pastry, and I was always slightly embarrassed when they were shared around at the church do. If only I had understood. I’m so glad you have the trifecta- something to do, something to look forward to and someone to love. It’s surely what we all need.

  5. Yorketown circa late 60’s had 2 varieties of bakeries – Braund’s and another I’ve forgotten – both of the dry and flakey persuasion. BUT there was Woods’ Deli and Wally Woods Wife made the finest Cornish pasties know to man – then or since. Shortcrust pastry as “someone” close to you recommends. Egg washed goldenness with a generous hand crimped pleat rising like a hand-sewn Kookaburra seam across the top. A thick firm baked base to hold the myriad IDENTIFIABLE veggies – peas, carrots, sweet corn, onion – intermingled with the piece de resistance of hand minced meat (lamb or steak?). Lightly peppered as was the fashion of the times.
    It lingers in the memory like Gatsby’s green light. The search for even a vague replica as elusive as another Barrie.
    I’ll see your sausage roll and raise you.

  6. I reckon this is your best yet sausage roll review, Mickey.
    In spite of Swish, I will say that – when viewed through the prism of 30 years of hindsight – the Little River Band’s body of work stands up remarkable well.

    Glenelg South really exists?

  7. John Butler says

    Glenelg South? That would be somewhere in the water?

    Smoke, I’m afraid I’ll stand with young Swish re LRB.

    I know our judgmental young selves are meant to be looked at askance as we grow older an wiser (we hope), but you have to draw the line somewhere. LRB is that line.

  8. John Butler says

    PS: Swish – ‘Silver Studs with better teeth’. That is so painfully accurate I winced.

  9. Some fabulous echos of late 70s Adelaide here. Perhaps those sausage rolls and Cornish pasties were washed down with Woodies lemonade, then followed by a ‘dessert’ consisting of a Balfour’s kitchener/berliner bun. My friend Andy and I used to frequent Bennett’s deli on Fullarton Road near its intersection with Ferguson Avenue. The Commonwealth Bank was on the corner with Rob Brown’s service station opposite. I also had a bit of a thing about jubilee roll – best enjoyed with a slab of butter plastered on it. Oh to be so slim again so that I could part-take of these ‘luxuries’!

    But JB got it right – ‘Silver Studs with better teeth” – an absolute classic line!!!

    And I’ll confess that I was pro-LRB but thought that an earlier iteration, Mississippi, lost nothing by comparison, especially ‘Kings of the World’ and ‘Will I?’

  10. JB
    I fear that your musical snobbishness is showing.
    Reminds me of a friend of yours (and brother-in-law of mine!)

  11. Thanks all for reading and commenting. Much LRB analysis here and I confess that I don’t know where this line of thinking/metaphor came from. They just popped into my head, as LRB can do very occasionally.

    On them I reckon their harmonies stand up well as do many of the melodies and given their style and audience Shorrock goes nicely up front. I always liked Pellici’s drumming too.

    And the case against includes criticism that the lyrics are largely forgettable; mining safe territory in unremarkable ways and musically of course they were similarly not extending the universe. As such, I doubt they spent much time with Frank Zappa. They had one if not both eyes on the MOR American market, and why not?

    Listening to them as I wrote this piece I was reminded of the D-Generation’s great radio parody “Five in a Row” which came out in 1989/1990. In it LRB were mocked for being cruise ship fodder. If that’s true then they (and many of my musical heroes) are now post-retirement home.

    Indeed, Glenelg South is a suburb and the Broadway (both street and pub) is right in the middle both geographically and culturally, if not socially. Now Glenelg West would be a largely aquatic address.

    I’ve enjoyed the references to shortcrust pastry, Cornish pasties and Silver Studs too. Thanks to everyone.

  12. LRB Rule. Saw Glen Shorrock wearing a “Riddled Liver Band” T Shirt after a concert. Extra points for self effacement.

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