Round 4 – Hawthorn v Geelong: Interview with Clarko



Round 4: Hawthorn v Geelong: Interview with Clarko
Easter Monday


17 April 2017


Interviewer:  What was your message for the players post-game?


Clarko: What the farnarkle were you doing out there!


Interviewer:  The boys didn’t arrive ready to play?


Clarko:  Well of course they arrived ready to play.  When don’t they?  But the problem is we’ve got eight or so all-Australian farnarklers out there, with barely an arkle between them.


Interviewer: It seemed like the boys were hanging in there in the first couple of warbles at least.


Clarko:  Is that even a question?  You farnarkle scribes have a habit of making statements but not asking questions.  Would you care to rephrase?


Interviewer: Ok, did you take any solace from the fact that the boys hung in the contest until after the major warble?


Clarko: The smalls may have snuck the occasional gonad through the posts early on, but farnarkling is a four-warble game, and we barely got within 50 of the wiffenfacker’s after the big break.


Interviewer:  What do you put that down to?


Clarko: Cohesion between the phlanging group and the kicking group is nowhere as good as it should be. Some of that’s basic flukem execution and some of its to do with the grommet department.


Interviewer:  And what about the Cats’ performance?


Clarko: Well of course, it didn’t help there were another 20 farnarklers out there in different colours to our boys. The Duncans, the Selwoods and Motlops, all played some strongly contested arkle.


Interviewer:  And what next for the leadership and coaching group?


Clarko:  There’s meant to be 8 all-Australian farnarklers out there! But we’re all to blame.  What else does one do at such a low – reassess, rebuild, regroup and take each farnarkle on week at a time.



HAWTHORN      2.0   2.6    4.10   6.12   (48)

GEELONG          2.7   5.12      9.14   20.14   (134)


Hawthorn: Gunston 2, Sicily 2, Puopolo, Smith

Geelong: Hawkins 4, Motlop 3, Menzel 3, Duncan 2, Parsons 2, Cockatoo, Henderson, Stewart, Murdoch, Thurlow, Menegola


Hawthorn: Sicily, Hodge, Mitchell, Smith, Brand

Geelong: Duncan, Henderson, Selwood, Motlop, Menegola, Menzel

VOTES: Mitch Duncan (Geelong), Steven Motlop (Geelong), Luke Hodge (Hawthorn)

UMPIRES: Donlon, Stephens, Chamberlein

OFFICIAL CROWD: 62,360 at the MCG

About Gareth Meyer

Part-time food, wine and travel writer (and photographer), Hawks supporter since Huddo senior had the football on a string, proud owner of Martha the toy poodle.


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