Round 13 – Essendon v Carlton: The thumb and the thumbscrew

 

 

 

For Carlton it’s not about winning, it’s about stopping their rivals from winning. Think of Chris Grant. There was no need for Ian Collins to stick his nose in.

 

At the tennis, the people who clap double faults barrack for Carlton. “That’s business,” they say. Carlton supporters talk more about beating Essendon in 1999 than they do about their own achievements.

 

Carlton’s greatest achievement so far this century is beating Richmond in the Elimination Final in 2013. They only got there because AFL Supremo Mike Fitzpatrick expelled the Mighty Bombers and replaced them with his old team. I count that final as an Essendon victory because Carlton was our proxy. Too bad they couldn’t go on with it.

 

When their president John Elliot got off his $66M fraud charge because the court ruled that it was technically illegal for ASIC to compel Mr Elliot to hand over evidence that made him look bad, he walked out on the ground at Princes Park in his best suit before the bounce against Footscray and raised both arms in victory. The crowd went wild with delight.

 

It was a sight to behold. You had to admire their blind loyalty. Their man had stuck it to the man. They loved him for it. He was a blue-blood in touch with the common man who made a point of being extremely generous with player payments. And for that the AFL persecuted him. The AFL went so far as banning him from smoking at the footy in his own box. They stationed a bloke in a blue coat to peer through the keyhole to check if he was lighting up.

 

I hate Carlton but I love the contest they provide. Sometimes we are the thumb and they are the thumbscrew, and sometimes it’s the other way around.

 

Prediction:
Carlton are starting to fancy themselves again. Their supporters know the time is right for another historic Essendon victory. One thing is for certain: whoever wins — we will hate each other more. Football will be the winner.

 

To read more from Michael Pardy click here.

 

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