(I’m Not) Interested in Ryobi

To the tune of “I’m Interested in Apathy” by TISM.


Big Bash broadcasts on Triple M

I sold the TV rights to Channel 10

Davey Warner’s in trouble again

Forgot to turn up last weekend


They’re all things that interest me

But I’m not interested in Ryobi

Ryobi Ryobi Ryobi


Fluoro colours instead of creams

Is how I like to dress my franchise teams

Currently cricket’s biggest question

Is Shane still Liz’s first selection?


All those things, they fascinate me

But I’m not interested in Ryobi

Ryobi Ryobi Liz Hurley


Day-night matches at the ‘G

They no longer do it for me

Would rather be spreading the word

In a random Sydney suburb


Where else would I rather be

Anywhere but at Ryobi

Ryobi Ryobi Ryobi


Well here we are at Bankstown

I’ve lost interest


(Taken from James S and The Jolimont Street Band’s forthcoming album “20/20 Vision”. Catch James S and The Jolimont Street Band on their National Tour at any of the 4 Sydney suburban venues. For bookings:  johnthebookie.com )

About Luke Reynolds

Cricket and Collingwood tragic. Twitter: @crackers134


  1. Very clever and very apt, Luke. I have no idea who TISM are, so I sang it to “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel. It works anyway. Love the Liz Hurley and Ryobi rhyme, and the Liz/Shane question/selection. Cheers.

  2. Great laugh Luke. Enjoyed that.. I’ll be painting some external walls of the house this Spring/Summer so I’ll have the cricket on. Not sure how much of it I’ll listen to though.

  3. Malcolm Ashwood says

    V Clever Luke just hate how the tournament is in Bankstown also find it interesting that if Kane Richardson was from Sub Continent we would think his missed run out was
    Mach fixing no he is Aust so a terrible stuff up Double Standards

  4. Is Shane still Liz’s first selection? Ha ha!

    Shit, that’s a hit Luke. You lyric beautifully!! The song was tailor made for your disillusionment

  5. Stephen Cooke says

    Love it, Luke. I have no idea what’s happening with the cricket so your reports are the first things I look for on the site. Very funny. Interesting to see the ABC throwing in its lot with the A-league. To me, that’s the litmus test for which code will prevail. Cricket on and off the field has jumped the shark – and the ABC has voted.

  6. That’s a beauty, Luke.
    What are you like on a guitar?
    Or swinging on a wrecking ball?

  7. Humphrey B Flaubert and Ron Hitler-Barassi eat your heart out!

  8. mickey randall says

    TISM’s Greg! The Stop Sign! is ripe for a re-write based upon Essendon’s drugs saga. Nice job Luke.

  9. Phil Dimitriadis says

    Clever stuff Luke. TISM had an album titled: Gentlemen Start Your Egos. Appropriate in relation to cricket in this age.

  10. Paul Daffey says

    I like TISM’s Great Trucking Songs of the Renaissance.

    T.S. Eliot, He Wanker is a good track

  11. Luke Reynolds says

    Thanks everyone for the comments. Nice to see TISM still has a few fans.
    On a brighter cricketing note, the Pomborneit Bulls CC started our season with a big win yesterday. After 6 months of being downcast about our Grand Final loss and our national teams fortunes, it was nice to really enjoy the game again.

  12. Luke Reynolds says

    Mickey, how about Dank! The drug guy!

  13. mickey randall says

    Luke – that’s it! See, it’s half written already!

  14. Can’t possibly dislike a TISM inspired pisstake on a place called Ryobi. Well done Luke.

    Though I must say, if CA must expedite what is arguably a redundant competition as early as possible in the season, then they picked a beautiful cricket ground to do it. I loved that massive fig tree that copped such a battering.

    And given the reasonable crowds, the FTA coverage and lessening apathy as the tournament progressed, with some fairly watchable entertainment sans the garishness of the dumb’n’base Cash Bash, then I’m afraid reports of Ryobi’s death might be exaggerated.

    The major downside for me was how it made for such a pathetic Ashes preparation.

    Btw, D.A. Warner, He Wanker.

  15. Luke Reynolds says

    Cheers Jeff. North Sydney is a wonderful venue. For NSW games. We really need to get the Junction Oval up to scratch to host these type of games.

    Nice work getting dumb’n’base into your comment. Like that song, love it when Humphrey gets behind the drum kit.

  16. And for the viewers at home, this is Dumb’n’Base.


    Watching the vid there is no place for these guys in Ryobi Town. Too technically correct, and their running between wickets is too Wood/Darling-like.

  17. Luke Reynolds says

    Great stuff Jeff. Clearly TISM’s techniques weren’t ruined by T20 cricket.

Leave a Comment