FPS Report: Chase my blues away

By George Habib

Hope (noun) 1. a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen
2. A feeling of trust

As I walked to the ground from Jolimont Station I had a few thoughts. Firstly, how sh*t Docklands is in comparison, and secondly that following the win last week that I could have an early Christmas present and we could win against the Bluebaggers as well. I felt a surprising level of hope despite the Blues having made me feel blue on far too many occasions including in recent times when they were suffering from being salary-cap cheats. (Yes, I am one who believes given the NRL’s response to the Storm we should of stripped them of their Premiership cups of 1970, 1979, 1981 and 1995 and replaced them with some form of colonic cleaning device).  Last year we had a good win in the second half of the year and we have been in such even form this year. Despite the Bluebaggers efforts against Geelong, Andrew Walker being out was good for us, and I thought that Cloke had turned a corner last week and that Dawes was picking up the speed of the game in the Seniors. Despite my sense of hope for the day, I still didn’t pack any food because I just can’t eat at the footy.

We began well in the first quarter – winning the contested ball, well on top  in the centre clearances and kicking straight for goal for the second time this year. The game and its rhythm for the day was evident within the first 10 minutes. We were running and kicking, relying on pressure across the ground. Our goals were coming from marks and goals in the forward arc. Both Dawes and Cloke looked on song and the goal by Dawes from an acute angle was pleasing to someone who has defended him to others for some time! The Bluebaggers were handballing and kicking their goals through  crumbers. Whilst the Blues had more inside 50s, their forward movement was more disorganised. Despite Yarran (who is going to be an unbelievable player into the future) having a chance to even the scores at quarter time, I was confident we were on top, with our more even spread and heavy bodies starting to rattle their disposals by hand. Also interesting was the tactic on Judd, who had one opponent after the other running along side of him, with some heavy tackles being laid. The other interesting aspect of the game was that the Umpires had obviously forgotten that a player could hold the ball. During the course of the game players began to hold it longer and longer in a tackle. I didn’t mind this given the flow of the game but if it’s confusing to me …

Excitement (noun)        1. A feeling of great enthusiasm and eagerness
Something that arouses such feeling
2. Sexual arousal.

Now the second quarter is not a treatise to rival the Kinsey reports. I’ll leave it at football being a form of sublimation of erotic interests for male spectators in the 40s with children!  We continued our pressure football across the ground. What was a tremor in the first quarter became a significant quake on the Mercali Scale (Why does Richter always get the credit). The Carlton players started to fumble the ball. The magnitude of it leading to a 39 point lead with ten minutes left in the quarter. A particular point of satisfaction was a goal that resulted from what was clearly out of bounds on the opposite part of the posts to the Wayne Harmes cheating thieving pocket.  It was 15 minutes of complete dominance with the Medhurst steal being particularly satisfying. That Irish men who shows that the Moors really enjoyed themselves with the Irish, managed to peg one back and then another O’hAlpin pass set up another goal leaving them in the game in the third quarter. This was despite a goal from Didak and a 50 metre penalty that led to another goal by Dawes. Pies up by 28 points.

Worrisome (adjective) Chiefly N.Amer         Causing anxiety or concern

The Blues dominated the first 10 minutes, they placed their A team of midfielders on the pill and Judd finally started to break the lines and continued to show that he is the darling of the Umpiring fraternity. The Pies lost their structure and some stupid play including a kick away from Reid let the Irishman into the game. Both Reid and Brown being under pressure for the first time and Reid making a few mistakes based on his inexperience rather than his ineptitude. The Irishman kept on kicking goals and handing them off. Betts, White and Houlihan scored, cutting the margin down to 4 points on two occasions. The concern was that they seemed to have all the run and were winning the contested ball out of the middle and also around the ground. Now cometh the Ballster and Swan who must of just gotten jack of the Jugganaut. Ball kicked two in the quarter, leaving him three for the game. Swan was everywhere and managed to kick an 80 metre goal through Beams blocking the Carlton defender to let the ball run in. At this point in time the wordEradicate came to mind – verb   to destroy completely; put an end to. We started the quarter 28 points up and finished it 27 points up. Despite the lapse in the work ethic amongst our player group, they were able to regroup without a quarter time huddle and turn things around. This more than anything was a sign of the differences between the Pies of 2009 and the Pies of 2010. Luke Ball was fantastic during the quarter and showed that he can also hurt a team on the scoreboard.

Contented (adjective)         happy and at ease,
expressing happiness and satisfaction

Despite the first goal going to Carlton, this quarter epitomised Greece’s credit rating being downgraded to junk status. The Blues (‘we’re coming’, ‘we think we’re coming’, ‘no not really at least not this year’) capitulated due to the around the ground pressure that had got us back into the game. We began to win most of the balls in dispute and the joy of the quarter was how well we ran it out. Ben Johnson just kept on getting the ball, Dawes kept on presenting, Leon tried but is really down on confidence, McCaffer won a few crucial  one on one battles, with one against Scotland being a highlight).  Thomas kept on running, Didak was both defensively and offensively in the game, and well …  it was a cakewalk. By the 15 minute mark an idiot behind us had left the building and so had many others. Whilst I agree with Malthouse, that defensively we need to improve, it was a great game of being tested and re-asserting the teams superiority.

The Votes

– Luke Ball (3 votes)  – Three goals, 20 possessions and stood up when the game needed to be won.
– Dane Swan (2 votes) – Anything Judd can do I can do better but without everyone saying I’m fantastic, and without any favours from umpires. His return to the middle in the third quarter, getting the ball to advantage was just fantastic.
– Chris Dawes (1vote)  – He just kept on presenting, had eight scoring shots and could of easily had five goals instead of three. He has been one that I’ve favoured for a while and bugger it, he deserves a vote.

Honourable mentions go to Beams (who was tagged by Gibbs yet still had influence), Cloke (ran all day), O’Brien given his great goal and how well he dances the Samba in the backline, Thomas and Pendelbury.

Danny Roach votes

By Ramon Dobb

Dear  FPs’ers,
It  is  with  great  pleasure  that  I  sit  here  on  Sunday  night  ponitificating  over  the  Danny  Roach  votes  after  witnessing  the  almighty  Magpies  giving  the  bitter  enemy  a  smashing  of  53  points  on  a  pleasant  Sunday  afternoon.    It  would  be  relatively  easy  for  me  to  just  give  the  3-2-1  votes,  but  as  a  mid  40yo  Pies  supporter  and  being  on  the  receiving  end  of  some  painful  results  from  “the  cheats”  I  feel  the  urge  to  enjoy  the  moment  and  prolong  the  enjoyment  of  a  great  day.      I  know  its  only  a  round  6  H&A  game  but  I  gotta  tell  you  that  as  I  left  the  pub  after  the  game,  I  felt  like  George  Costanza  skipping  thru  the  park  after  he  got  the  job  as  the  hand  model.

Words  cannot  express  my  hatred  for  this  mob  (kids,  this  is  “footy  hatred”,  please  don’t  try  this  in  the  schoolyard).    It’s  been  3  &  1/2  years  since  I  packed  up  from  Melbourne  and  moved  up  to  sunny  Queensland  and  whilst  I’ve  been  back  down  south  for  a  handful  of  games  each  year,  this  was  the  first  time  since  ’06  that  I’ve  been  in  town  for  a  game  against  the  most  despised  team  in  the  AFL.      As  I  walked  down  to  the  G  with  an  air  of  confidence,  the  chills  started  to  go  down  the  spine  as  memories  of  our  great  victories  over  this  mob  flooded  my  mind.

My  preferred  location  is  standing  room  in  the  outer  but  today  I  had  the  opportunity  to  enjoy  the  confines  of  the  Jimmy  Stynes  Room  for  an  official  Pies  luncheon.    1990  Premiership  Legend,  Michael  Christian,  was  the  MC  and  was  magnicent  with  his  snide  comments  towards  the  Bloozers  and  had  us  all  waiting  in  anticipation  as  he  said  he  had  a  “special  guest  coming  soon”.    Ohhhh  the  irony  that  the  leader  of  the  Danny  Roach  Medal,  Mr  Leigh  Brown,  turned  out  to  be  the  special  guest  as  I  sat  there  preparing  for  the  big  votes  for  the  day  (see  pix  attached).      Whilst  I’m  not  a  big  fan  of  Leroy,  I  must  admit  that  he  was  an  impressive  young  fella  on  the  end  of  the  microphone  and  a  genuine  team  man  –  but  I  WAS  happy  that  he  was  in  the  room  with  us  and  not  in  the  sheds  preparing  for  the  big  game  (even  if  it  did  make  it  a  tougher  job  for  giving  the  DRs).

Whilst  we  sat  in  comfort  with  Crownies  on  comfy  chairs  behind  glass,  it  didn’t  take  long  for  a  few  arrogant  obnoxious  loud  mouthed  opposition  fans  to  get  the  competitive  juices  flowing.    As  per  that  great  Spandua  Ballet  song,  to  cut  a  long  story  short,  after  three  quarters  or  verbal  sparring,  it  was  a  very  very  very  (x100)  enjoyable  last  quarter  and  surprisingly  the  earlier  voices  disappeared  midway  thru  as  the  “COLLLLLLLLLLLLLINGWOOOOOOOOOD”  chant  went  thru  the  dining  room.

I  was  quite  pleased  that  I  didn’t  have  to  give  the  Horsborough  votes  as  I  honestly  struggled  to  pick  our  best  players.    I  think  most  of  the  boys  played  pretty  well  at  times  but  felt  there  was  plenty  of  room  for  improvement  from  most.    Was  extremely  pleased  with  Dawes’  game  and  Ball  snagging  3  goals  and  Dids  and  Pendles  were  all  class.    Also  happy  that  we  were  able  to  win  the  game  by  53  points  even  though  the  Environmental  Ambassador  had  a  blinder  (as  I  listened  to  the  Gold  104  70s  show  on  the  way  home,  I  had  this  yearning  for  hearing  Leo  Sayer’s  “I’m  a  One  Man  Band”).    PS.  was  it  just  me,  or  did  I  see  him  handing  out  enviro  bags  and  picking  up  plastic  bottles  and  aluminium  cans  as  he  took  a  rest  walking  around  the  boundary  line  –  if  only  the  Storm  could’ve  pulled  that  swifty.

Anyway,  time  for  the  Danny  Roachers.    As  tough  as  it  is  to  put  a  downer  on  the  day,  here  goes………
3- Neon  Leon  –  I’m  a  big  fan  of  Leon’s  but  jeepers  he  was  dreadful  today  –  missing  goals,  extremely  slow  hand  to  foot  and  generally  lacking  any  zip.    He’s  been  “off”  the  last  few  weeks  so  maybe  a  week  off  could  be  in  order.
2- Ben  Reid  –  bloody  Nora  that  kick  that  gave  the  50m  penalty  in  the  3rd  quarter  was  a  dreadful  lack  of  awareness,  his  spoil  against  friendly  fire  in  the  last  quarter  that  gave  up  a  goal  and  letting  Setanta  get  a  few  goals  was  not  a  great  day.    I’m  happy  for  them  persist  with  him  thru  the  year  as  he  shows  some  signs  but  wasnt  his  best  day  today.
1- Josh  Fraser  –  After  a  decent  Anzac  Day  game,  should  have  been  able  to  exploit  their  ordinary  backline  but  didn’t  do  much  for  the  day.

GO  PIES!!!!!    Damn  that  was  goooooood!!!

Leigh Brown happy to be talking to Michael Christian pre-match.

About Ramon Dobb

A footy and cricket fanatic. A lifelong passionate one eyed Mighty Magpie fanatic. My writing is unashamedly written with one black & white eye open only - so please don't take offence, it's nothing personal, it's just the black & white way! Also a lifelong player and member of Washington Park Cricket Club, the Mighty Sharks. My 15 minutes of fame includes regular contributions to Hot Pies, the 1999-2004 Fanzine, and regular contributor to the Coodabeen Champions weekly competition from their heady 3RRR days. Go Pies and Floreat Pica.


  1. John Butler says


    You forgot 1987.

  2. Tony Robb says

    George, Your absolutely correct, Carlton should hand back their three wooden spoons. As for Mr Cloke turning the corner it would still appears as though it always leads down some alley to the wing. The Pies were even yesterday but Cloke, Thomas, Davis and Split Pea Fraser were not sighted until the last quarter blitz, The Pies will not win a flag with these four seagulls. Dawes is a find but ehBlues gidted to many turn over at half back due to over use of handball. Any one at the Pies interested in a third string midfielder as Brock McLean will be available. Well done Pies. Thoroughly deserved win

  3. Danielle says

    Gee, Leigh Brown looks pretty, he must have nice eyes…

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