AFL Round 16 – Richmond v Brisbane: Memories of Templestowe and other things football



5th July 2014

The Chairman (Middle Australia)

I’m a Richmond supporter, but grew up in the Fitzroy zone.  It was in the hamlet of Templestowe on the Yarra.  Originally I thought a hamlet was a small sandwich which would help explain why Templestowe is really in the ‘burbs and not a small village.  I used to work with a bloke we discreetly called Burb because he used to wear pants like Berber carpet.  I suppose it is better than being called Miele as I can’t imagine wearing stainless steel pants.

Down the street the Manuals, three on the tree, barracked for Fitzroy.  Steve, Phil and Pete were as Maroon and Blue as they come.  When the Roy Boys played their last Melbourne game in round 21 of the ’96 season against, ironically, the mighty Tiges, for the Manuals it was like losing a family member or trying to find reverse on the tree.  For the record Richmond managed to scrape through by 151 points; Richmond 28.19 (187) defeated Fitzroy 5.6 (36).

Templestowe High was where my brother, sister and I went to school.  We had a few footballers floating around the place.  Even though we were in the Fitzroy zone Terry Wallace was an old boy; very old to me by the time I started high school as he was in form six, as it was known then.  Nigel Brown from Camperdown came to Tempy High when we were in year 11 to train with Fitzroy.  The Pert, by name, brothers, Stuart and Gary were also at my school.  Stuey was in my year and Gary was two years below us.  I recall playing one of my very few games of footy for school, as I was crap, where I played on one wing and Gary played on the other.  For some reason the ball never came to my side of the ground.    Adrian Battiston from Tatura arrived when I was year 12 and he was in year 11.  Adrian played for Melbourne.  I don’t know how Adrian ended up at Templestowe High as none of my friends parents drove Range Rovers or had a lodge at the snow.

Saturday’s game was first up at the TV convenient time of 1.45pm.  If the Variable Ticket Pricing was a live market when Tyrone Vickery – Richmond’s answer to Justin Koschitzke or the current day Richo albeit without Richo’s skill – goaled within the first minute from some decent play by Richmond the market would have reached the peaks of Wall St in 1987.  However when Vickery scored his second goal before the three minute mark in what looked like two men (Jack Riewoldt was his conjoined partner) in a three-legged race trying to kick, or not kick, a goal inside the goal square you could hear rumblings of the GFC at the ‘G.

Sadly there weren’t really any highlights to report from this match.  The match was mediocre at best which befitted the way the two teams have played all year.  While Richmond won by 25 points Brisbane in many ways deserved to be closer.  Unfortunately for the Lions while they could get the ball into the 50 reasonably effectively they weren’t able to convert that to the scoreboard.  In the early stages of the last quarter Brisbane had eight inside 50s to Richmond’s zero for the return of two points.  It was the type of return Poseidon investors experienced in the late ‘60s.  Richmond on the other hand when they had their first entry into the 50 they scored via a goal to Reiwoldt.

The Futures Market was the only way to see positives for both sides in this match.  Brandon Ellis and Alex Rance continued their very good form and offer real promise for the Tiges when they return to the finals next year.  Cotchin and Martin were as reliable as ever and even Vickery played a good game.  The Lions showed promise in the performances of Rockliff, Hanley, and Clarke in particular.  Clarke played well to keep Reiwoldt quiet for most of the game.  Rockliff and Hanley had 36 and 34 disposals respectively.

As shown last season Richmond has the ability to play well, but like Telstra needs to start returning decent dividends on its talent.  Brisbane on the other hand appears to be very light on in ability and needs a Twiggy Forrest to re-invent their Poseidon before they become an unfortunate Adventure.

RICHMOND                        5.2          7.3          10.4        12.7 (79)

BRISBANE LIONS              3.3          4.5          6.10        7.12 (54)
Best: Richmond: Ellis, Rance, Cotchin, Vickery, Martin. Brisbane: Rockliff, Hanley, Clarke

Crowd: 34,560; 1996 – 48,884

Coincidentally Gary is being interviewed by Mike Sheahan tonight on Fox, but I doubt he will recall the school game he played on the wing.  I think he had leather poisoning after the match which would have affected his memory.



  1. Like the idea of you on one wing and G. Pert on another.

    Do you think current day footballers go to schools like Templestowe, or are they prepared in test tubes in labs and grown on moist white cotton in sunshine imported from Antigua?

    Nice piece Chairman.

  2. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says

    J Frost, S Frost, M Gawn all spent time at McKinnon Sec

  3. Middle Australia says


    My concern for kids these days is that specialization in sport is occurring too early. As the esteemed skill acquisition experts Professors Abernethy and Farrow would tell us kids need exposure to a wide variety of sports before specialising. As such I think there is trend towards the labs and moist cotton from Antigua especially in sports where there is money involved, e.g. tennis, golf and AFL.

    Incidentally my primary and high schools were bulldozed on the same day. Templestowe High is now a scene from the Truman Show. Templestowe Primary may be a community centre now. I do know the old blacksmith’s building is now a restaurant. Not sure if horse is on the menu.

    The Chairman

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