Poetry: A Difficult Birth

This could be the birth of the 19th man
Tom Harley on Thursday Night football, Crows v Pies

I wasn’t born yesterday Vitamin Boy.
No my first blood was in 91’ against those magnificent Hawks
In those nameless days I still prefer.
Darren Jarman would force feed Jason Dunstall
(Both have ballooned since)
I went to both grand finals. Although in 98’ at half time,
against the Carey led Roos, I denied them three times
(in the first three quarters) before they crowed.
I know you will think me fickle I had been meaning to go
to the new/old oval, but something has delayed my first visit
Let me explain. When anyone puts their whole heart in I’ll cheer
but supporting someone who isn’t putting in their best effort
is like faking an orgasm, ultimately unsatisfying for both parties.
So last night I took a Selfie with Joffa on the way in, just for fun.
I really came to see ‘Tex’ who is like Tom Hanks in ‘Big’
with bigger ears and a long straight kick, but I stayed to watch Charlie
Cameron, who must surely win the rising star.
So when you said I came down in the last shower Tom I was so cross
my voice drowned the loudest siren in the country.
Then, as Sando said, I went home with a smile on my face.



  1. Charlie Cameron is impressive. Looks like he’s played for years! Let’s hope he can kick on ( in every sense)! Excellent read. Thanks.

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