What a round it’s been in Footy Eddie.  It was yet another Cakewalk for The Good Old Collingwoods on Friday night as TRP delivered the coup de grâce to The Gallant Tigers.  The Bombers & The Blues gave us, arguably, the best draw of  the season so far, in match chock-a-block full of drama and sublime skills, this one WDTTW.  The Hawks had to work hard to bring home the bacon down in Lonny against a serious challenge from The Visitors.  The Handbags were loaded with housebricks up in Steak&Kidney as The Visitors prevailed, while over in the City of Churches it was the Blue Collars over the Stuffed Shirts.

Come Sunday and The Fuchsias demonized The Mermaids to pile on their share of the percentage bonus made available courtesy of the appalling Football League’s marketing strategy while Freo led at every change to defeat a gallant North Melbourne.


Is it time to have two subs on the bench?  Say one of whom can be used as a sub for a tiring or under-performing player – as has been the case this season; the 2nd sub used purely as a replacement for an incapacitated player.  Before anyone starts, sure it’s open to abuse.  Brent Guerra was chaired off the ground last week against Richmond, only to reappear later in the game, apparently none the worse for it.  But it’s worth thinking about.  How the Dons managed their bench, and how the players stepped up would have given them the points under marquis of Queensberry rules on Saturday.  That is, if that’s the way be did things.

Conspiracy theorists may have it that Mark Webber’s 2011 campaign & car are being sabotaged.  Some may even have it that the calls are coming from within the house.  Should that be the case, maybe we’ll see a change of heart – or even stable – after his field swallowing efforts from 18th place on the grid in Chinese GP.  And is anyone having trouble with a Chinese Grad Prix?  It just doesn’t have the same ring to it as Nüburgring, Silverstone or Monaco does it?

But enough of my gabbin, let’s see who called for more in Round IV.

Struggletown v Carringbush. The outcome was always predictable.  This week it took the opposition six minutes to kick the first three goals, and they finished the Opening Stanza 8-6 to 2-2.  Jack had booted The Tiger’s two and looked set for a big night until The Magpies crowded him out of the contest.  By the Long Break The Woodsmen had consolidated their lead with a couple of majors in the Shadow of Half Time, one with 10 seconds to go.  Those late goals took the shine of Richmond’s solid 2nd quarter effort.  Come the Championship Quarter and, as they did against Carlton in the Opening Round, The Tiges blitzed The Woodsmen.  Six goals to two and the contest was alive.  Deledio, Newman, White, Cotchin, King, Jackson & Martin led the charge and new boys Grigg & Conca were in everything.  The Tiges weren’t going to roll over.  Or were they?  Swan & Co slipped it up a gear and The Maggies piled on nine goals to two to run out comfortable winners.  Apart from the 3rd quarter lapse they were far too polished for their opponents.  Their skills by foot & hand were sublime – Daisy Thomas a standout.  You’d pile the kids in the jinker and come down from Noojee just to watch him play wouldn’t you?  Cloke was unstoppable in the aerial contests but the Collingwood Coach, Nathan Malthouse, will be praying that Leroy Brown gets off his striking charge and that Darren Jolley is right for next week’s Anzac Day Cup against Ryder, Hille & Bellchambers.  They really should have won by more.  Accuracy is still a problem.  24-17 looks good, but many of the goals were close in snaps or marks.  Still, 41 scoring shots from 63 inside 50s will win you most matches.  The Tiges have an Old Rival from the 70’s – North Melbourne at Ethelred Stadium on Easter Sunday.

The Mustard Pots v The West Coast.  No Buddy, no Riolli, no Hawthorn.  This would have to be a worry for the Coaching Panel at Waverly.  With West Coast cleaner with the ball and Carlton-reject Kennedy providing a target up forward, The Weagles could have stolen this one.  Only ex-Skipper Mitchell’s dominant 1st Half and The Visitor’s inaccuracy was keeping them back as the teams retired to the rooms for the Long Break.  With the Four Points up for grabs in a tight, low-scoring affair, enter The Lance.  In an individual performance, the likes of which we haven’t seen since the day when Rooting Roo stalked Pagan’s Paddock, he stole the limelight and the match.  The Coasters catch the ferry and the Indian Pacific back to Perth for a week of R&R, tormented by thoughts of what could have been.  The Hawks test themselves against The Undefeated Moggies on Easter Tuesday on The Hallowed Turf.

Carlton v Essendon. What a fitting result for an exceptional match.  Both teams showed outstanding courage, commitment and sheer football prowess.  The contest itself had enough twists and turns to encourage even Keith Dunstan to get of his bike and watch the closing passages.  Professor Gadget’s tackle on the cocky Gartlett for instance.  Jade Simpson’s tired defensive effort that saw the ball rebound to the Essendon forward zone.  The free to Garlett for in-the-back when he was clearly caught with the ball inside the Essendon attacking 50. The agonizing Essendon misses when they kicked 4-5 after kicking 7-8 in the previous three quarters.  Carlton’s five goals straight in the same last quarter after kicking a match losing 6-13 for the previous three.  This will go down as one of the great matches for Season 2011, not only for the four quarters of Total Football, but the importance of the result.  Those waxed Four Points – two each – are sure to play a major role in deciding who plays whom in September/October.  But that’s a way off yet.  Next week Essendon play Collingwood in the Anzac Blockbuster.  And they’ll do it without a couple of their key ball movers – Dempsey & Wunderlich.  They both fell to knee injuries in the Opening Stanza, which in itself makes The Bombers’ effort more meritorious.  The Miseries have The Shame of South Australia across from the City of Light for a Saturday night shindig under cover.

Steak & Kidney v The Handbags.  The Bloods weren’t disgraced here by any means.  In typical Sydney weather they took it right up to The Cats.  But at the end of the night it was Geelong, with 11-15 who prevailed against The Swans’ 7-12.  As the only other undefeated side they are starting to turn a few heads.  Anyone who booked them at $11 for The Flag at the pre-season call of the card will be seeing some real added value about now.  The Swans are hard to beat up there at the best of times, let alone in real Football-is-a-winter-game sort of weather.  And hands up anyone who can see similarities of this Sleepy Hollow Outfit with the Glenferrie Road Too Old Too Slow Too Good Teams of 1990 & 1991?  If injuries don’t cruel them, they might just have another Flag in them.  Or at least a Flag Challenge.  We’ll find out just how likely that challenge is on Easter Tuesday when they line up against the other main Challenger – The Mayblooms.  The Lakers have one of the three byes on offer.

The Chokers v The Free Settlers.  Fair dinkum, you wouldn’t have this Adelaide Mob in a jam sandwich, would you?  They roosted 4-6 to three behinds in the Opening Term and then managed 5-6 for the rest of the match.  And it’s not as if they were up against any sort of quality either.  It was Port’s 1st win of the season.  Remember, this was the same team that gave Hawthorn a five goal start and ran them down to inflict their (Hawthorn’s) only loss of the season.  The Crows looked more like big fat pigeons waiting for the pot than any sort of professional Football body and Coach Craig may be starting to hear the haunting strains of that most macabre of showground concessions in his dreams.  The dreams won’t be restful during the week either, as he prepares his ragtag army to take on Carlton under cover next Saturday night.  Port get the chance to make it two on the trot when they invite the Gold Coast Mermaids down for an historic visit in the Shadows of Mt Lofty.

The Cold Coast Metermaids v The Fuchsias. No surprizes here with the end result, although The Dees seemed to be making heavy work of it for a bit.  The Ever Fanatical Carrara Faithful were ecstatic when Their Brave Boys took a quarter of football from an opponent for the first time and are they are looking that little bit better each week.  The Mighty Karmichael had nine possessions – a startling six of them in the same Championship Quarter The Metermaids won.  Is it time to say – no Karmichael, no Suns?  They have The Victorious Chokers in the City of Churches next Saturday Arvo.  The Redlegs are up in the Eight with 2-1-1 and an acceptable percentage of 116.18.  They won’t improve on that next week as they have the bye.

The Barry Crockers v The Shinboners.  The Longshoremen sent The Shinboners down below but not without having to extend themselves.  The most controversial passages of play occurred in the goal square.  One goal umpiring decision was debated between the maggots for some time.  The field maggots humiliatingly overruling the original ‘touched’ call.  Another call of behind was ‘adjusted’ without intervention or debate from those further afield.  But with gambling drawing OUR GREAT GAME into its slippery embrace, surely it raises the question of human frailty.  It can’t be too difficult for a review panel to quietly look at each score and just as quietly acknowledge its veracity through the maggot mike.  Or in the case of an overrule – signal in some way that the goal maggot got it wrong?  North have The Tigers at Ethelred Stadium on Easter Sunday.  The Stevedores have The Doggies over in Perth.

Remember, if you read it in The Wrap you’ll know it’s not crap.

And with so many draws getting about, let’s consider the sound advice of Niels Bohr –

Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future.

About John Mosig

I'm an Aussie Rules tragic who can remember, as a four year old, shaking the hand of Captain Blood in the rooms just before he ran out onto the ground after half time, as my Old Man slipped him a packet of under-the-counter Craven A cork tipped. Now it's my turn to take my grandson Ben through the ritual of character building that is the journey through PUNT ROAD to the outside world.


  1. johnharms says

    John, very lively. Putting the kids in the jinker and heading down from Noojee is a mighty fine line and one that should re-appear in the future.

  2. John Mosig says

    Credit where credit’s due Harmsie, it came from my maternal grandfather who was up there at Nojee ringbarking the big trees as a 10 year old with his father before they brought the family up from Kensington. And yes, Mum was a North Melbourne supporter until she met my Dad.

  3. johnharms says

    I think the term ‘jinker player’ could gain currency. I’m certainly pinching it (acknowledged of course).

  4. John Mosig says

    I’m deeply flattered.

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