The Pre-Wrap: Benny G appointment signals glimmer of light at end of Tigers tunnel

Where Life Imitates Football

What a week it’s been in Footy Eddie.  The changing of the guard at THE TIGER DEN has begun as Benny Gale comes home to PUNT ROAD.  With new facilities and a new attitude, TLSPRF catch glimmers of light peeking out from the edges of the storm clouds.

The maudlin fairground dirge from the Coaches’ Carousel lifted an octave or three as Rocket gets a two year deal.  Curiously, Prez Smorgy offered an assurance that they were all in the same kennel around at Whitten Oval?  Read into it what you will.  But with another late season fade looming, could SOTG be excused for observing that the journey from Kennel to Doghouse is but a short one.

And while they fiddle around at TIGERLAND the hottest coaching prospect for 2009 – sorry FIG JAM, at this stage you’re only a high profile prospect – may slip through their fingers.  Could the shilly shallying thorough process at PUNT ROAD have anything to do with checking the pedigree of a certain Junk Yard Dog?

The Carousel up at the Sydney Fairgrounds has closed as Coleman Medal winner and Assistant Coach accepts the understudy role at The Swans.

Eddie Schizoid is in the news again.  Not unfamiliar with conflicts of interest, this time he sits on the panel that decides the tenancy of – your guessed it – the Olympic Park complex.  And there’s no 2nd prizes for guessing who slips into the space left when Athletics Australia gets short shifted down to the wilderness of Albert Park?

But enough of my gabbin’. Let’s see who’s going to be getting plenty in Round Number Twenty.

The Leafblowers v The Pride of South Australia on The G tonight.  The big question is have The Squawkers shut up shop for the season?  Dowler & Whitecross have shown as much promise as their replacements, which would suggest they may be blooding a few youngsters for the remainder of the season.  The Family Club will be as unsociable as ever (They know no other way – Ed) but The Chardonnays will be keen to consolidate their September position.  They ran The Handbags to a near thing but were embarrassed in front of the Rabid Adelaide Mob by The Mighty Maggies last round.  This should be enough incentive.  They see themselves as the Hawthorn of the Festival State and will be as keen for the bragging rights as the Four Points.  The Hawks are capable of anything should their game click, so shrewd investors will keep their thoughts to themselves on this one, but tipsters would have to stay with The Crows.  It’s The Mighty Adelaide Crows from us here at The Wrap.

STRUGGLETOWN v Carringbush at THOF on Saturday Arvo.  What a send off this would be for the Much Maligned Joel Bowden.   The Out Of Favour Shane Tuck joins him to add some bite to the midfield.  The Pies have had to replace Goldsack with Wellingham in the side that conquered Adelaide last weekend.  THE TIGES could well have cost caretaker Jade his career last week.  They are better than that and TLSPRF can expect no less than a do or die dip on Saturday.  Although it must be said, Sydney have had RICHMOND’S measure for some time no. THE TIGES love playing The Pies this one will be closer than first appears think.  If you can get five goals in down at the Grace Darling give it a run with the tobacco money.  As a head to head investment though, you’d have to look on The Pies as a good thing at $1.10.  THE PUNT ROAD FAITHFUL will be out in numbers to say farewell to their Number Eleven Man.  Recruited from the NT under the father son rule, he has been a Loyal Servant of The Club and his silky left foot kicks from the half back line have thrilled TIGER FANS over 265 games.  He won two Jack Dyer Medals, two All-Australian Blazers, and the Boys Own Dream of kicking the winning goal after the siren.  Retire in peace and enjoy Life After Football Joel.  You have served your Club well.

The Coasters v The Shinboners over there late Saturday arvo.  The Norsemen broke through for a rare win last week and will be keen to continue the streak.  The Eagles toppled The Dishlickers and will also be ready to rock & roll, especially at home.  Both sides are unchanged but we’re sticking with The Weagles this week.  And at $1.36 they’re The Wrap Investment Opportunity of The Round.

The Lions v the Dogs at The Gabbattoir on Saturday night.  The Dogs were lamentable last week and heads will be down along Droop Street.  On paper The Scrays look good enough to win this one.  And they would have had a Rocket through the week.  They’ll be desperate enough, but Boss Voss has the Lions cherry ripe and they will be eyeing the Coveted Double Chance and Home Final combo.  This is a toughie, but Mrs Wrap says No Higgins No Footscray.  Never one to argue, we’re going with The Maroons.

The Tinseltowners v The Sleepy Hollow Millionaires at the Other Olympic Park on Saturday night.  The Millionaires had their credit rating downgraded after last week’s display against Fev & The Boys.  Down at The Cattery, Wojcinski, Rooke and Milburn have all foundered and Tenace has been omitted; the veteran McVeigh has not been able to stand up to the mark for The Bloods.  Scarlett, Taylor, Blake & D. Johnson are piling aboard the Geelong Flyer for the connexion with the Spirit of Progress up the Harbour City.  Look, you’d have to go for The Moggies in this one.  It’s a must win for them.  Having said that, they’d need to win well.  Johnny Longmire isn’t about o let them do that.  We’re going with The Pradas and, along with other SOTG, will be watching the performances of the Two Toms: Long Tom & The Tomahawk.  The Pussies to win but not convincingly enough to lift their credit rating.

The Redlegs v The Barry Crockers on The Paddock That Grew early on the Sunday.  This is going to be a bottler.  A genuine knock down drag out affair.  It always is when Tanker v Tanker.  However, there can be only one winner in this case, and it’s our tip that it’s going to be Melbourne.  They’ll win the PDP and take the Four Points.  This is a Red Letter day for TLSRF and we should see a big crowd at THOF to celebrate this double victory.  The Anchormen will be able to hold their heads up high and return to Perth with their PDP intact for Incoming Prez Steve Harris.

The Power Failures v The Bluebaggers in the City of Churches on Sunday.  We haven’t been all that impressed with Carlton’s Coming this season, but having said that, five of their 11 wins have been against Top Eight Teams.  The last to suffer from Carlton’s enigmatic form, Geelong, may have been off colour on the night, but nevertheless, the win was an authoritive one.   The Chokers have regained P. Burgoyne, Josh Carr (For a farewell game? – Ed), Ebert, Salopek & Stewart.  Port just can’t let this one slip.  With three teams willing them to fail, they must unpack their very best form for The Silvertails.  With our hearts in our mouth, we believe they can.  The returns, the shame of losing and even the very survival element – as a Football Entity – should be enough to get them over the line.  The Miseries stole the corresponding match last year, so there’s also the revenge element.  You guessed it, at even money, The Tealers are The Wrap Roughie of The Round.  Especially if the Artful Football League forces The Persil Whites to wear those un-Carlton like away strips.

The Dive Bombers v The Majestic Feeling Faints at Ethelred Stadium late on the Sunday.  St Kilda’s ins are, in alphabetical order, Baker, Gilbert, Fisher, Goddard, Hayes, Dal Santo & St Riewoldt.  The Dons have added Bellchamber, Lovett, Hooker & Welsh to the list that let last week’s contest with Brisbane slip through their fingers.  The Gliders will probably get off the ground, but then you have to be airborne to crash.  And crash they will.  This Saint Kilda outfit will just have too much firepower for The Whingy Hill Tyros.  And at $1.12, The Junction Oval Seagulls will be carrying the Wrap Household Budget for the next fortnight.

Good tipping and even better punting.

And remember, if you read it in The Wrap you’ll know it’s not crap.

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