THE PRE WRAP – ROUND I

FOR THE PHILOSOPHICAL MARNGROOK FAN

What a week it’s been in Footy Eddie.  Footballs perennial losers are in the news still – Old Chicken Lips and The Fev.  But Our Great Game isn’t about scandal.  Unless of course it’s about  the shameful way Matty Knights was treated out at Whingy Hill.  In a presentation to the football press, Knighta said he had an exclusive product to sell and once he was sure he was getting full value for it the  “gory details” of one of the most public termite jobs in the history of THE GAME would be exposed.

And there’s no truth in the rumour that Jeanie Pratt will replace Ratts as coach at Princes Park after Carlton’s scrambled win against the improving Tigers.  Sitting 2nd on The Ladder and with Jumping Jack Riewoldt heading the Coleman and teammate Trent Cotchin heading the Brownlow, The Tiges are adding value to the Richmond Brand.  And on last night’s form should trouble more than a few.  Their five debutants all pulled their weight with Reece Conca and Bachar Huoli the standouts.  The Silvertails snapped out of their malaise in time but looked far from impressive.  Their Skipper & Dual Brownlow Medallist led from the front and inspired the likes of Syd Jackson look-alike Slick Eddie, Murphy, Simpson and the unlikely looking Robinson to get them over the line when they blitzed The Tiges in the Final Stanza.  While we all accept that Football is a Winter Game, the conditions weren’t poor enough to justify some of the skill errors of both sides, but let’s put this down to Opening Round nerves.

But enough of my gabbin, let’s see who’s going to be in the run after Round I.

Geelong v The Feeling Faints at The G tonight.  It’s hard to go against last year’s Runners Up, but there are sound reasons to do so.  As hard as you sweep and as high as you lift the rug while doing so, it’s not possible to hide all the dirt.  The Culture Club will be keen to blow it all away with a resounding win, but like their pre-season, they’re going to be compromised.  The Big Tomahawk has shown signs of terrifying maturity.  His opponent, the Iconic Zac Dawson has not.  Throw in Stevie J, Varcoe, Stokes and Mad Dog Mooney and you have enough scoring power to make Rod Stewart jealous.  They look a little brittle down back, maybe a little old even, but with Bartel & Selwood backing up they’ll provide more scoring opportunities than their opponents.  Enough in fact to take the points.  It’s The Pussies to open their account for 2011 in a tightly contested thriller.

The Collingwood Magpies v The Port Adelaide Magpies at Ethelred Stadium tomorrow arvo.  Chance here to catch Collingwood away from the MCG in Melbourne.  Make a note of it.  In fifty years time it will be a trivial pursuit question – Collingwood has never played in Melbourne away from the MCG this century: true or false.  Even at this away game it’s Carringbush for us here in The Wrapcave

The Pride of South Australia v The Mighty Fighting Hawks in the Shadow of Mt Lofty tomorrow night.  No 2nd prizes here.  Hawthorn to win in the bit.  Buddy & Roughie to kick a lazy metric dozen between them and the ground start to move under Coach Craig’s feet.

The Boys From Old Fitzroy v The Barry Crockers under the palms on Saturday night.  Another no brainer.  Freo should be able to continue where they left off last season against one of this year’s highly fancied Coveted Sylvan Shield contenders.

The Bad News Bombers v The Sons of The West on the Little Ground at the end of Bourke Street ton Sunday arvo.  The Gliders have wound up the lakka band under their new coaching panel and have shown they intend to become a force once more.  But there are signs that The Dishlickers have shrugged off their kennel cough for season 2011.  Be prepared for a boilover, but we’ll stick with The Tricolours.

The Redlegs v The Sydney Swans on The Paddock That Grew on Sunday arvo.  The Dees haven’t shown us much in the pre-season and The Long Suffering Longroom Faithful will be nervous going into this one but they should have too much going for them up forward and in the midfield.  Again, be prepared for a tight fast contest that could go either way.  The Homeside for ours: The Fuchsias.

The Coasters v The Shinboners at Paterson’s Stadium on Sunday night.  Where the Hell’s Paterson’s Stadium?  Kennedy out at CHF and The Nat in the goalsquare should provide too much forward opportunity for La Cras and his team of goal sneaks.  Not that North are short of height, grunt and pace.  Should be a thriller but once more we’re going for the Homeside.  The Eagles.

Good tipping and even better punting.

And remember, if you read it in the Wrap you’ll know it’s not crap.

About John Mosig

I'm an Aussie Rules tragic who can remember, as a four year old, shaking the hand of Captain Blood in the rooms just before he ran out onto the ground after half time, as my Old Man slipped him a packet of under-the-counter Craven A cork tipped. Now it's my turn to take my grandson Ben through the ritual of character building that is the journey through PUNT ROAD to the outside world.

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