Round 15 – Geelong v Melbourne: Soggy moggies find a way to win

 

 

“Four spare seats at the footy tomorrow night. Want one?”

 

“Sure,” I reply. “What’s the story?”

 

“Thursday night game on the shortest day of the year finishing the wrong side of 10 o’clock and a normal school day the following day. All four grandkids are scratchings.”

 

“Oh right. Big bucks media money or a kid friendly culture eh? Give the AFL due credit, they are nothing if not thoroughly consistent on this one.”

 

But with our AFL grizzles temporarily put aside and forecast rain notwithstanding, the wet weather Cats all purpose jacket is summoned from the wardrobe and it’s off to the game.

 

And it’s a breeze getting to our seats between rows as there are many other vacant seats and fewer than normal “excuse me’s” required shuffling into our spots. Other folk have grandkids too it seems.

 

Tyson Stengle warms up the Cats crowd with a goal after three minutes.

 

“Did you have him for first goal?”

 

A knowing smile and a quiet nod three seats up the row almost pass unnoticed.

 

In what will become 2023 recruit Tanner Bruhn’s best game of the year, he dribbles a hurried wrong’un along the ground which lurches to the right at the last moment for the second goal at the nine minute mark.

 

But then “que desastre Mr Fawlty!” at the 12 minute mark as an errant shoulder in friendly fire from Gary Rohan sends Jeremy Cameron half way into next Lent. We later learn he is awake and talking for which we are grateful but we take little joy in knowing he will miss at least one game.

 

As the predicted rain duly arrives early in the second quarter, the game chugs along as a soggy arm wrestle with the Demons in front by a point at half time.

 

At this point, shelter inside the bowels of the Brownlow Stand seems the best option.

 

The many assorted outlets all have queues and they remind me of my other pet AFL hate – food and drink prices.

 

 

The above photo of the RDL patented ‘twin thermos’ strategy, while technically illegal in one sense, amply demonstrates the point. The hot dogs and hot dog rolls from Woolworths @ $7, the Margaret River chardonnay from Dan Murphy’s @ $18 and the tomato sauce and hot English mustard from the pantry – all up $25.

 

Wandering along the concourse and running the mental arithmetic on what the equivalent cost of these items would be, I stop counting when I get to $92.50 – and that’s with no hot English mustard! QED.

 

Outside, the wet game resumes with a Gary Rohan goal after 4 minutes but subsequent goals to Jacob Van Rooyen and Kysaiah Pickett see the Redlegs extend their lead to 7 points at orange-time in a dour low scoring affair. Well, up until then it had been anyway.

 

We prepare for the worst to come…

 

…but it starts raining goals instead.

 

Ollie Henry goals after two minutes…scores level.

 

Zac Guthrie decides attack is the best form of defence and goals two minutes later…6 points up.

 

A Tom Atkins initiated sequence goes Atkins to Hawkins to Rohan – who is in everything by this stage – to Blicavs who goals…two goals up.

 

Three minutes later, the Cats’ play of the night starts down the Moorabool Street wing again with the busy Atkins to Hawkins to Rohan who unloads a monster wet ball kick…and we’re three goals up.

 

Goals to the ever-reliable Mitch Duncan and the lively Tanner Bruhn stretch the advantage to five goals but subsequent goals to Christian Petracca and Bayley Fritsch – who had been well held by the close checking Jake Kolodjashnij all night – reduce the lead.

 

After Fritsch kicks what is his second goal from just nine touches, your reviewer’s rather acerbic and altogether too loud assessment of “trash time goal Bayley” is not at all well regarded by the handful of Demons’ fans who have somehow managed to find seats near ours.

 

At final siren it’s the Cats by 15 points after kicking five goals in three quarters then six goals in 20 minutes after three quarter time.

 

Best on ground is the indefatigable Gary Rohan. Other key Cats are Brad Close, Tanner Bruhn, Jack Henry and Tom Stewart.

 

Best for Melbourne are Christian Petracca, Joel Smith, Jack Viney, Christian Salem and Steven May who had the better of a relatively quiet Tom Hawkins.

 

Wet but happy and well fed and well quenched at affordable prices emerge as the key themes of the evening as our designated driver escorts us home.

 

 

GEELONG           3.4     4.7     5.10     11.12     (78)
MELBOURNE     2.1     4.8     6.11     8.15     (63)

 

GOALS
Geelong:
 Rohan 3, Bruhn 2, Stengle, Hawkins, O.Henry, Z.Guthrie, Blicavs, Duncan
Melbourne:
 Pickett 2, Smith 2, Fritsch 2, van Rooyen, Petracca

 

BEST
Geelong:
 Stewart, Close, Bruhn, Rohan, Duncan
Melbourne: Petracca, Viney, Salem, Brayshaw, Lever

 

INJURIES
Geelong: Cameron (concussion)
Melbourne: Nil 

 

SUBSTITUTES
Geelong: Jack Bowes (replaced Cameron in the first quarter)
Melbourne: Charlie Spargo (replaced Jordon in the third quarter)

 

Crowd: 19,617 at GMHBA Stadium

 

 

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About Roger Lowrey

Roger Lowrey is a Geelong based writer who lists his special interests as reading, writing, horse racing, Roman history and AEC electoral boundaries. Some of his friends think he is a little eccentric.

Comments

  1. Roger- as is sometimes the case on this site, I enjoyed your recount more than the game itself. Increasingly I reckon that context is everything, and your personal details regarding catering and the evening’s arrangements gave the story its richness. As a serious storm tore through our city last night, I was pleased to be couch-anchored in Ugg boots and trackies, with no vague temptation to venture beyond our fenceline. Well done to you on braving the selflessness of being a fan.

    However, that said, I don’t want your Cats to replace the Crows in the eight!

  2. Well played. The West Coast Wine goes far better than the West Coast Eagles. Don’t think your smuggling strategy would get past the gendarmes at Optus. I’ve had my espresso reviewed on occasions.
    As for prices – thought Perth was bad until we went to Springsteen concert at Letzigrund soccer stadium in Zurich (home of Grasshoppers FC – rival to Young Boys FC from nearby Bern). 4 emaciated “chicken” nuggets on a plate of soggy chips was A$20. On the positive side they sell full strength Carslberg beer in cups for $9. No responsible service of alcohol here. The bulk discount of 10 cups in a “bier packet” for the price of 9 applies. The “packet” is a cardboard cutout carry case that 5 biers hang neatly beneath. Smoking appears compulsory in Europe and you get a lungful of passive smoke with every cup.
    Springsteen saved the day.

  3. Thea Allan says

    You certainly can make a picture from words. Thanks for sharing

  4. Great effort to get to the footy on such a miserable night, RDL.
    And an excellent report. A strong win to the Cats.

    I have not eaten at the footy for many years, and generally I don’t drink while watching a game. I admire your stealthiness. I have long been a smuggler of alcohol into music festivals and the like – I hate feeling like I am being gouged. Which is what it is.

    Thanks again.

  5. Roger Lowrey says

    Mickey, I had a devil-may-care attitude to the weather forecast. As it turned out, I’m glad I made the effort. With respect to Cats v Crows in the bottom half of the 8, I don’t think it will matter much. A mischievous mate of mine is barracking for a Coll’wood v Port GF where Port win the pre game toss for jumper and select the prison bars outfit thereby making Eddie even more erratic than usual.

    Peter, I shall make a note to be much more vigilant with my contraband next I am in Perth. Mind you, a full strength Carlsberg beer for $9 at the Cattery would be lovely – but I won’t hold my breath.

    Thea, many thanks as they are the most beautiful words you can say to any writer. Your comment really made my day.

    And not forgetting you Smokester, it’s nice to know we share an aspect of civil disobedience albeit at different occasions. You’re right though, I just can’t stand the price gouging hence my behaviour.

    RDL

  6. Marcus Holt says

    I love the subterfuge and anti-gouging protest. I hate getting to a game late and hungry and being forced to shell out exorbitant prices for sub-standard footy “food”.
    I couldn’t get to Thursday’s game so I compensated by going to the Collingwood v Crows on Sunday arvo. But, as the cold wet weather washed over Geelong I seriously contemplated turning around and going back home to watch the game in warmth and comfort.
    Like you, I’m glad I went. Both games were rippers. Thursday night because the Cats stormed home to victory, Sunday arvo because it swung wildly and was played like a final with the outcome in the balance right to the final siren.

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