Round 13: St Kilda v Richmond: At least Milne didn’t kick a goal

By Michael Allan

It’s that time of year again. That day when I question whether I should turn up to watch. The day when bad memories come back to haunt me.

Today Richmond play St Kilda. Many Richmond supporters would say they hate Carlton, Essendon or Collingwood the most. Not me, if there’s one team I want Richmond to beat it’s the Saints.

The reason is very simple. I can’t remember it happening. I can only remember footy from about 2004, when I was eleven. Before that I do have some football memories such as seeing Lloyd kick 100 goals against us, and my first grand final in 2002, but not much. I can remember plenty of losses to Saints and each year when we play the Saints I think the memories get worse and worse.

Consider the last three against Saints:

– Round 13, 2007: after being down by four points going into the last quarter the Saints ran away with the match, with Gehrig kicking five .

– Round 22, 2007: Richmond, down by three points at the last change, were smashed in the final term, with the retiring Gehrig kicking five goals one last time. That loss wasn’t too bad as the consolation prize came in the form of Trent Cotchin, but my hatred for St Kilda would reach an all time high at our next encounter.

– Round 7, 2008: With the lead changing constantly, the Saints had a four point lead in the last moments thanks to a Milne (my most hated player in the AFL) kicking his seventh. Moore had a chance to goal but hit the post and Jack Reiwoldt couldn’t make the distance after the siren. It was discovered after the game that nine seconds had been taken off the clock in which young Jack could’ve passed the ball off. This tipped me right over the edge, making  matches against the Saints the most important for the year.

I find it hard justifying why I’m going tonight. Richmond clearly have no chance of winning and since I’m sick it would be wise if I just stayed at home viewing it from the comfort of the couch. However, tonight mum has scored Medallion Club seats. I’ve never watched a game from there before and it’d be nice to get away for the feral Saint fans that always seem to surround us.

As we get to our seats the late changes are announced. My favorite Tiger debutant Andy Collins has been replaced by the infamous Jarrod Oakley-Nicholls; the Saints are beating us before the game has started.

The match begins the way I thought it would, with Riewoldt  kicking the first goal, but there’s a difference: this is Richmond’s Riewoldt. Jack continues to take strong marks inside 50 but fails to finish them off. Will there ever be a forward at Richmond who can consistently convert from set shots?

Saints look slow and give the ball up under Richmond’s pressure. The pressure holds strong for the quarter and Richmond hold the Saints goaless for the quarter. Unfortunately Richmond hasn’t capitalised on St Kilda’s slow start and only lead by fourteen.

After that the Saints show why they’re undefeated. Richmond can’t find a way out of their defence and I get a great view of it from the pocket. The Saints zone forces Richmond to chip it around in the backline before kicking to a contest in which St Kilda’s bigger bodies win every time. The Tiger defence can take only so much bombardment before the Saints finally break through. Riewoldt and Koschitzke get fantastic delivery from the likes of Dal Santo and Goddard.

At three-quarter time Richmond’s score hasn’t changed since the first term and the game is all but over.

The final quarter does nobody any good. Richmond’s poor skills only lower their confidence while the Saints are thinking about next week and aren’t even trying.

As the siren sounds I witness another loss to the Saints. This one doesn’t break my heart; it just bored me. I go home feeling like crap.

I desperately try to think of a positive. The kids showed nothing, and the seasoned players still can’t kick accurately to break a zone. At least Milne didn’t kick any goals.

St Kilda 0.3   5.5   11.9   13.14 (92)

Richmond 2.3   2.3   2.3  5.6 (36)


St Kilda – Koschitzke 5, N. Riewoldt 2, Goddard, Dal Santo, Geary, Ball, McQualter, Schneider

Richmond – Morton 2, Cousins, Hislop, J. Riewoldt,


St Kilda – Goddard, Dal Santo, Gram, Hayes, Koschitzke, Ball

Richmond – Foley, Tuck, Moore


  1. Allan RAKNES says

    dear mick, i,ve been going to saints games since 1962.
    i stood in the outer at the junction oval,moorabbin,waverly,telstra and now ethiad stadium thru rain hail and shine. We got flogged relentlessly. Please be happy for us, it’s our turn (hopefully) go SAINTS

  2. Michael Allan says

    I agree it’s St Kilda’s time to win a flag. I’m okay with them sitting on top of the ladder. All I want to see is Richmond beat them. As soon as I see that all grudges on the saints will be dropped. Unfortuneately the way the two teams are travelling I’ve still got a few more years of waiting.

    PS: I hope you beat Geelong this week, I haven’t got over that 157 point belting.

  3. danielle says

    Atleast the Saints didn’t ruin your 17th birthday!
    i had my 17th at the Collingwood vs
    St kilda match……
    then add that my seat was IN the st. Kilda cheersqaud….
    worst birthday ever!!!

  4. Michael Allan says

    That would’ve been terrible. There’s nothing worse than being flogged and sitting around opposition supporters. Luckily for me my birthday was on a Wednesday this year.

Leave a Comment