Grand Final 2023 – Collingwood, I was made for loving you: my 2023 Floreat Pica premiership story

 

by Ramon Dobb for the Floreat Pica Society

 

 

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Another exquisite pressure kick from the amazing Nick Daicos hits Hoskin-Elliott on the chest. My new found buddy in N9J1 nervously tells me there’s one minute to go. The Pies are 4 points up. We’ve been here before and it’s been torture. There’s a “1970-2021” negative voice in one of my ears and there’s a “2022-2023” positive voice in the other. After so much footy trauma, my head doesn’t know which voice to believe. But as The Hyphen goes back to take his kick a strangely positive feeling charges through my body and soul. “We’ve got this!”

 

One of the longest minutes of my life plays out between the arcs on the members’ wing. Possession footy, dispossession, possession, dispossession. Mitchell, Crisp, Andrews, ball up, “45 seconds” yells a pensively excited N9J1. Mitchell, Pendlebury, Mitchell, Mihocek. “20 seconds” N9J1 cries. Contest, Hoskin-Elliott, scramble, it’s mayhem with the ball in dispute on our forward flank. SIREN, SIREN, SIREN. It’s MAYHEM everywhere now! Collingwood are premiers, we’ve finally won a close one, Collingwood are 2023 premiers!

 

I hug my daughter Tahlia, I hug N9J1, I hug the big young bloke that’s been standing behind us most of the game and he lifts me up in a bizarre Magpie brotherly bear hug embrace. I hug Tahlia again, arm in arm we sing the famous cakewalk song with gusto with fists pumping in the air. Pies fans are embracing, high fiving, hugging, crying, laughing, yelling, cheering, the responses are an amazing outpouring of emotion from our broad Magpie church.

 

Collingwood – I was made for lovin’ you, especially when you win the flag!

 

I was made for lovin’ you, baby
You were made for lovin’ me
And I can’t get enough of you, baby
Can you get enough of me?

 

Collingwood 2023 Premiers, what a beautiful ring that has to it! Premiership number sweet sixteen!  What an amazingly satisfying feeling this is.  After all the footy trauma that Pies’ fans have been put through over the years, Fly’s Pies of 2023 have delivered the most satisfying season and we have won one of the most incredible Grand Finals of all time.  And yes, the Kiss pre-game entertainment sums it up perfectly, I was made for loving Pies’ premierships, and with Fly’s “19th man” messaging, the Pies are made for lovin me (and all of the Floreat Pica Society and Magpie Army) too!!

 

So, where did it all go “wright”?  After it all went wrong in 2021, it all started with Graham Wright who appointed Mr Right, Fly McRae, as our Senior Coach.  After an exhilarating 2022 season that saw us storm up the ladder, many of the doubters in the media had us as one season wonders and dropping out of the finals.

 

I wasn’t sure what to expect in 2023, but when I heard Fly’s press conference in the lead up to Round One, he instilled the belief in me that the season could be ours.  His simple messaging that we’d done the work over pre-season was enough for me to believe.  He just has a way with words that makes you understand and believe! And our Pies were true to his word with a stirring Round One victory over the reigning premiers to make an early statement.  Nick “35” Daicos with 35 possessions, Bobby & JDG 3 goals each and Darcy Moore’s chase down tackle on traitor Ollie Henry were the highlights and the shape of things to come.

 

The season was full of highlights, games, players and personal highlights. During our scintillating Round 6 – 9 run, I was travelling through Europe and riding the wave of our thrilling comeback wins on Anzac Day, the epic Adelaide match and the games against Sydney and GWS.  My Pies scarf and cap were proudly worn all around London town and my experience of listening to the last quarter of the Adelaide win as I walked around The Oval waiting for my tour is something I’ll never forget.  You just knew from the commentary that we were going to storm home and win and when Sidey kicked the point to put us in front and the siren sounded shortly after the whole of South London heard my guttural shouts of joy.  It was great to then tour the famous Oval, where our God, Daics Senior, captained us to the 1990 Fosters International Cup!

 

I listened to the Sydney win as I toured the iconic Palace of Versailles and later that day was inspired to pose in my Pies jumper at the Insta-famous Colonnes de Buren in Paris.  Our big win over GWS was a pleasant way to spend the train trip from Zurich through the Swiss Alps to northern Italy.  And to come back home just in time to see us beat the arch enemy Carlton by four goals in round 10 was an absolute “home, sweet home” moment.

 

Another personal highlight of the season was our Round 15 clash with Adelaide at the G where I took my 4 year old Grandson, Eli, to his first live game.  Eli wore his brand new Pies’ 35 jumper and “Papa” wore his old 70s/80s Pies’ 35 jumper. And what a game it was, with the Pies winning a thriller by 2 points.  We had a crew of six of us at the Punt Road end and we went nuts as we stormed home with 5 goals. When his Mum messaged us later that night to say Eli was singing the theme song and doing a quiet Collingwood chant as he lay in bed, it melted my black and white heart.

 

 

The Port game was another highlight, like two heavyweight contenders slugging it with the Pies winning with another Billy Elliott TKO just before the final bell.  Fly had talked about big plans for July and our Pies delivered.  From there we were almost guaranteed top spot and it was “wake me up when September comes” and it seemed like the players must’ve had the same feeling as we dropped a few games before season end.  My “22-23 voice” was telling me we were preserving and preparing for bigger things in the final month of the Home and Away, but the nagging “70-21 voice” was still lingering and whispering in my ear that we’re out of form at the wrong time of the season.

 

And bigger things it was in the Qualifying Final as we started with a bang in the first quarter looking sharp.  We opened up an early lead, focussed on the footy after the Maynard/Brayshaw incident, responded quickly after most Dees’ goals and played our “on and off” tempo footy to perfection for a stirring finals victory.  The relief of beating an in-form opponent and the guarantee of a home Preliminary final had the “22-23 voice” sounding a bit louder.

 

Our Preliminary Final win wasn’t as “convincing” as our QF win. We started well, looked in trouble early in the 3rd, but flicked the switch with 5 of the next 6 goals to lead at ¾ time.  We then went into Presti mode most of the last quarter for a thrilling win.  The Josh Daicos’ gather, sidestep and short pass to Hoskin Elliott in the final seconds to seal the win was another exquisite play from the eldest son of our God and still gives me chills when I watch it.

 

After several hours of celebrating on Swan Street, the reality of another Grand Final week hit me the next morning. The uncertainty of tickets, the uncertainty of the game and the uncertainty of my footy state of mind. Premierships haven’t come easy for Pies fans of my vintage.  I turned 60 this year and in my lifetime as we entered another Grand Final week I’ve lived through 11 losses (I remember 9 of these traumatic events), 2 draws and 2 wins. But since Fly joined forces with Wrighty (and their merry band of helpers) a brave new culture has emerged, a culture of winners, a refreshingly positive vibe and an air of steely self-belief, the new “22-23 voice” in my head.

 

After a wild week of ticket options for family and friends, we have 2 corporate hospitality tickets in The Hassett Room with seats in N8 (Level 2 forward pocket Punt Road end), an M15 standing ticket, an M16 seat and a Q1 seat. My eldest daughter Tahlia and I get the 2 primo seats, brother Mal gets the standing ticket and youngest daughter Emma and her hubby Joel get the separate seats.

 

I’ve heard the Pie Hard podcast guys talk about Grand Finals, “you’re either going to a Birthday or a Funeral and you don’t know which one it is until the end of the game.”  Sadly it’s been a funeral far too often and the negative “70-21 voice” weighs heavily.  But, as heavy as it is, Fly’s positive “22-23” voice is getting some equal air time!   When I look at the teams, I think we are the “better team”, but the “70-21” voice has me worried about their X Factor of Neale, Andrews, Charlie, Joe and their workhorse Oscar in the ruck.  I avoid most of the papers, TV and radio shows in the lead up as it just makes me nervous and I try to keep myself otherwise occupied until Saturday finally arrives.

 

 

We meet at my daughter Emma’s in Caulfield about 11:30, I say a few footy prayers as we take some pre-game Insta pics and have a couple of nervous beers.  We train it in from Ripponlea and the carriage is full of nerves.  We go our separate ways at the MCG gates after we hatch our disorganised plans to catch up during and after the game.  Tahlia and I are greeted with a scrumptious pre-match 3 course meal, fine wine, cold beer, Mumm champagne and primo level 2 seats.  There’s a few celebs around the area, Cotchin, Selwood, Sheargold. Then the main guest interview was with Angus Brayshaw.  What sorcery is this?  Last I heard from the media and Dees’ fans was that he was murdered in cold blood a few weeks earlier! I toast his resurrection and enjoy a couple more nervous ones and then it’s Kiss time.

 

 

The Kiss Army and the Magpie Army rock the G, it was awesome and it helps to relax my mood and I embrace the moment with their classic hits, a great fire show and the frenzy of the mini Kiss kids.  Finally it’s time for the Pies to enter the arena and the Magpie Army is in full voice.  Uncle Colin welcomes us, with great respect from the G crowd, and the Peter and Darcy Moore embrace fires an emotional charge through me and reignites the “70-21” and “22-23” voices again!

 

It’s game on and like the first two finals we burst out of the blocks looking “on”.  Nick kicks the first goal, and brings memories of the famous No. 35 kicking our first goal in a premiership win.  A minute later Bobby Hill kicks our 2nd.  A few cracking Lions’ goals and it’s a high quality start.  A howler non-50 not paid to Coxy sees them hit the front, the courageous and luckless Murph hits the deck and the “70-21 voice” says not again.  But, “22-23” fights back with a classic Checkers snap and then “Big Time” De Goey goes bang on the siren for a big time goal.  Wow, what a quarter!

 

The second quarter starts with Brisbane gaining the momentum and concerningly they get out to a 13 point lead.  But, this Pies team has got substance.  Crispy stands tall with a massive clutch goal from outside 50 – almost the same spot as his clutch goal in the QF.  Then Bobby Hill takes a hanger for the ages and adds two more goals, for four before half time.  And then again, Crispy goes bang after the siren for another clutch goal.  Dare I say it, wow what a quarter!  “22-23” is telling me we’ve taken their best shots, we’ve fought back and we’re owning the big moments.

 

It’s half time and I head down to see Emma with a couple of plastic Mumms (Mumm was her champagne of choice for her wedding celebrations in December 2022 and my wife Janet and I visited the Mumm Champagne House in Reims in May this year, so it was only fitting that we shared a couple at half time, as good things come in threes). I race back up to the dining room and I sneak in a couple of compulsory half time Party Pies and I’m hoping that it’s the Party Pies in 90 minutes time!

 

The 3rd quarter is a grind.  We are all over the Lions but can’t put the score on the board.  A dreadful 50 metre penalty is paid against Oleg (forget Harry Himmelberg, Leggie is my pick for Markov the Year).  The “70-21” voice is ropeable as the Lions get another charity goal. Another goal sees them sneak into the lead, but Bobby and Pendles have other ideas.  Just as we’ve done all game and almost all year, we stand up in the big moments and Bobby’s pass to Pendles sets him up for a rare set shot at goal.  It’s more tense than the Rosebud foreshore in summer.  And the Rolls Royce delivers with a dead-eye-dick goal to put us back in front, and doesn’t he love it as he flexes and hits the interchange bench.  After a wasteful quarter, it was the circuit breaker we needed, the crowd is electric, the chant is loud and we lead by 4 points at ¾ time. Wow, what a quarter!  We’ve owned the last minute of each quarter and gone into the breaks with momentum and I’m praying that it continues for 30 more minutes.

 

One quarter of footy between a footy funeral or a footy birthday and the “22-23” voice is still quite strong, but not yet convincing.  A couple of early points from gettable shots – a Daicos snap (which still looks like it could’ve been a goal and I’m still bewildered there was no call for a score review) and a Bobby set shot from 40 metres out which just fades left.  An arm wrestle ensues for the next 15 minutes and all of a sudden Charlie bobs up from nowhere and snaps a goal to put Brisbane back in front at the 18 minute mark.  Not again, I hear from the “70-21” voice, please not again.

 

Then, IT happens.  Unbeknownst to me, a plan, so cunning that Baldrick would approve, is being hatched in the heat of the MCG centre square.  Pendles is the architect. His last quarter has shown his experience, brilliance and will to win! It’s Coxy – a revelation in the ruck since R23 – down to Nick, quickly over to Pendles who kicks to a typical blue collar Checkers contest at CHF.  Enter stage left the amazing Nick Daicos, youngest son of our God, who gathers and magically executes an instinctive mid-air look-away handball for the ages to a rampaging JDG who goes BAAAAAANG on the run for quite possibly the greatest and most important team goal I have ever seen!  I jump out of my seat and do my first pogo of the Grand Final. We’re back in front by four points, what a response, what a clutch goal. I listen to the Whately commentary the next day “You need your stars… and Collingwood’s stars just went and wrenched the Cup back!” and it’s perfect.

 

From the bounce an IQ gather and pass hits Sidey on the chest on the outer wing.  He gets tackled late and slung to the ground and the Pies crowd roar in unison and frantically point to the 50 metre line.  Yessssss, yells the crowd as the umpire awards the obvious 50 metre penalty.  Sidey takes his time, sums up the situation and steels himself for the moment. He’s taking a shot and despite a history of dinky kicks, the “22-23” optimist in me thinks he’s a chance to kick the goal despite the 50+ metre distance.  My fingers are crossed and I pray to the footy gods as he lines up.  He walks in, arcs a little to the right, flushes the Sherrin perfectly and it sails through the middle! Sidey jumps into Pendles’ arms and I jump out of my seat again, higher than Billy Picken (oh how I hope he’s watching from upstairs), and it’s pogo number two for the game.  My heart is racing, we’re 10 points up, there’s 4 minutes and 23 seconds to go.

 

Surely we can hold on, my “22-23” voice says.  But the “70-21” voice is not done with yet.  A Daniher goal with 1 minute 33 left on the clock brings it back to less than a kick.  93 seconds left for agony or ecstasy.  I’m on the edge of my seat, fingers are crossed again. I plead to the footy gods again. The mad 93 second scramble on the opposite side of the ground, with an equally anxious N9J1 shouting updates, finally ends up with the Sherrin on our half forward flank.  Then the greatest sound of all, the final siren, is somehow heard above the pulsating crowd noise for the ultimate ecstasy. Finally my footy prayers are answered. See the barrackers are shouting (shout it, shout it, shout it out loud), as all barrackers should, ohhhh the premiership’s a cakewalk for the good old Collingwood.

 

What a win, what a team, what an amazing feeling.  I have Crispy and Bobby as my Norm Smith choices, both would be worthy winners.  There were so many great players, Nick, Pendles, Mitchell, JDG, Howey, Sidey, WHE, Maynard, IQ, Josh, Lipinski, McCreery, Coxy and more, what a team effort. We held their X factor players really well.  With Frampton selected to Harass Andrews he did a great job. Titch’s job on Neale had him on his knees.  Coxy and Cameron double teaming in the ruck turned Oscar into a grouch.  Our team backline effort meant that Charlie wasn’t King of the G and despite playing pretty well we kept Daniher mostly in check so he wasn’t Mighty Joe.

 

As the players and crowd celebrate for ages, my daughter Emma, hubby Joel and their Lions’ mate Cam join us up on level 2.  I embrace Emma in one of the greatest hugs I’ve ever experienced, the other was with Tahlia a few minutes earlier!  Em’s going off her chops, like Father like Daughter!  Still singing the song and waving her newly purchased Pies’ Flag, it still hangs in her front window two months later!  The official ceremony finally kicks off.  Bobby is a hugely popular winner of the Norm Smith medal with his electrifying four goals. Skipper Darce does his thing with another incredible speech, he’s such an impressive young man and I can’t wait to drink his premiership pinot noir which should arrive soon. And Coach Fly announces to the world that he became a father this morning and they called her Maggie – what a day he’s had, what a guy, this is now a very serious bromance I have!

 

All players are cheered with gusto and then the moment that will forever have the hairs standing on end, cause a lump in my throat and bring a delighted tear to my eye, the great (and Grand Final tortured) Peter Moore presents the premiership cup to his son, the great Darcy Moore and the amazing Craig McRae. We watch the players as they soak it all in and do the long slow beautiful lap of honour.  The G is rocking. There’s so much love, I imagine it to be the 2020’s Woodstock or Sunbury.  We stay until the players are all back inside the rooms and we wait in anticipation for Sidey to give the cue to belt out the famous cakewalk song!

 

 

Oh the premiership’s a cakewalk, for the good old Collingwood.  We, the 19^th men and women, watch the big screen and sing it with them and then we join the masses to the exit. A few phone calls on the walk out to Mum and Bro.  And thoughts of Dad, hey who’s chopping up those onions. The reason we’re all mad Magpies. He suffered from the “1960-2011” voices before he left us in the 2012 pre-season. In 1990 he copped a 4am phone call from me when I got home from round one of the celebrations and in 2010 it was a more civilised 7pm call to celebrate. Our 19th Man Father/Son bond still lives on and his spirit was with me most of the weekend and especially when I saw the beautiful Moore and  Daicos’ Father/Sons celebrations.  We make our way down to Swan Street and it’s party time, it’s high fives, hugs and Go Pies everywhere.

 

The party’s just begun, we’ll let you in
You drive us wild, we’ll drive you crazy
You keep on shoutin’, you keep on shoutin’
I wanna rock and roll all night and party every day

 

 

We see a hairdresser, of all places, that’s packed to the rafters, pumping out music and its full of Pies fans dancing on tables and going nuts.  So we join them, dancing on tables to classic rock songs with the Collingwood theme song played in between each song.  It was then on to the Fargo Bar for some celebratory drinks, lots of singing and reliving all the big moments.

 

Eventually, I leave about 9pm, more high fives and Go Pies in Swan Street, get the train, get some Maccas and go back to Emma’s, my city pad for the night, to watch the replay.  I get about half way through the 2nd quarter and she comes home so we restart it and relive the game together.  Bizarrely, I’m still nervous, that “70-21” voice never quite goes away, but to my joy we win the replay!  It’s time for bed, but the lure of social media and all the celebration posts sees me scrolling and watching all the amazing videos and pictures for another hour or so.

 

 

Sunday morning I can’t wait to wake up and relive it all.  I buy the papers, grab a strong coffee and head into the Family Day to meet Tahlia and Eli.  As we wait for the players to come out on stage, we watch some of the replay and relive most of the first half of the game again.  With Eli perched on my shoulders, both of us sporting our number 35 jumpers, the players are presented on stage and interviewed, they raise the Cup, the streamers explode everywhere and it’s time to go home.  We see Josh and Nick on the balcony getting a photo with the Cup and stand in the background.  And lo and behold when the picture gets published on the Pies socials later that day you can see the three of us when you zoom in under Josh’s right arm!!

 

 

I finally head home, listen to SEN’s grand final wrap up and talkback.  I head out to the Dromana hotel for drinks and dinner with Janet and some friends and I proudly wear my Pies’ polo top.  When a woman of the same vintage sees me in the front bar she lets out a loud “Carna Pies”.  We had a great chat across the bar as I waited for my beers.  A bit later as I walked past she asked me if I’d just heard her singing the Pies’ song and I said no.  So she said let’s sing it again then – so we sang loud and proud to the main bar!  They all had a smile (some through gritted teeth I’m sure) and enjoyed our show.  And that my friends was the weekend, a premiership weekend.  Premiership sweet sixteen.  A premiership where good triumphed over evil, my “22-23” voice won the battle against the “70-21” voice. I was made for loving you, Collingwood, I shouted out loud and I partied every night.

 

P.S. A few weeks later I got to hold the Premiership cup and yes, I gave it a great big KISS! Floreat Pica and Go Pies!!!

 

 

 

COLLINGWOOD   4.4     9.9     10.15     12.18 (90)
BRISBANE            3.0     9.3     11.5       13.8 (86)

 

GOALS
Collingwood: Hill 4, Crisp 2, De Goey 2, N.Daicos, Mihocek, Pendlebury, Sidebottom
Brisbane: Cameron 3, Daniher 3, Bailey 2, McCarthy 2, McCluggage 2, Robertson

 

BEST
Collingwood: Hill, N.Daicos, Crisp, Howe, Mitchell, Pendlebury
Brisbane: McCluggage, Daniher, Coleman, Andrews, Bailey, Cameron

 

INJURIES
Collingwood: Murphy (concussion)
Brisbane: Nil

 

SUBSTITUTES
Collingwood: Patrick Lipinski (replaced Nathan Murphy at quarter-time)
Brisbane: Jarryd Lyons (replaced Callum Ah Chee in the fourth quarter)

 

Crowd: 100,024 at the MCG

 

2023 Norm Smith Medal voting

15 – Bobby Hill (Coll)
5 – Keidean Coleman (Bris)
4 – Nick Daicos (Coll)
3 – Tom Mitchell (Coll)
2 – Jack Crisp (Coll)
1 – Scott Pendlebury (Coll)

 

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