Round 4 – Collingwood v Essendon: Footyfied Friendships

anzacPeople say that Grand final day is the biggest game of the year but I beg to differ.

Team up ANZAC Day footy with a room full of your closest friends add some amazing food and you’ve got a winner.

As expected Christian and Tony were well into burning the food when Joanne and I had arrived. The best thing about Lebanese BBQ is that you never leave hungry, ever.

Joanne gets a text from Theresa:

‘Be there in 3mins’

Theresa is famously known for always being late, it’s a pure miracle she was going to arrive before the bounce.

When I normally see these gorgeous people its hugs all around but this time there was a difference. Christian and I were in our Collingwood jumpers but Tony, Joanne and Theresa were draped in red and black. How am I friends with these people?! No not just friends but adopted family. I guess in that way it’s kinda like the comradery the ANZACs had and it’s only more amazing that the spirit of day continues to bring friends together.

We always playfully tease each other but this time there were those looks of ‘we are going to crush you’ and ‘branggg it onn!’ between us all.

“Well…this is awkward” said lone Carlton supporter Elias. Footy can really test your friendships IF you let it.

As we watched the ANZAC ceremony come to an end, we eagerly sat on the couches gripping at our team scarves.

Tony and Christian still cooking outside had managed to move the huge BBQ over to the sliding doors, facing the lounge room and amusingly the TV. This distraction resulted in Christian melting his mum’s good food warmer pot on the grill. Lucky for him Mother’s Day is coming soon.

Christian’s brother Julian seated to my left, had turned the couch arm into a punching bag and fired two pillows at the wall in frustration to the umpiring.

Julian and i: “BALLLLLLL! BALLLLLL!”

Theresa: “THAT’S NOT BALL”

Me: *whacks her with my scarf* “ITS BALLLLL! Go eat salad!”

Tony: “GOOOOOOBOMBERRRRS!!!!!”

Then Jamie Elliott, aka the best thing to happen to Collingwood since Scott Pendlebury, kicks the best NOT A GOAL, goal ever! Things got so rowdy arguing over this goal, that wasn’t a goal, I expected Jerry Springer and his camera crew to walk into the lounge any minute. The Essendon crew were calling BULL and Julian and I decided to temporarily like the umpires, but only for a minute of course.

Andre, age ten, the youngest of Christian’s siblings was very entertained by the spectacle of jabs that were being thrown between us all. As the lone Geelong supporter in a house of Magpies he was very relaxed. He was once a Collingwood supporter but wanted something to cheer about at a Nab Cup Pies v Cats game and jumped ship to the Cats ever since. All those Geelong Premierships, he’s probably all cheered out by now.

I was ready to yank my hair and false eyelashes out in frustration at our turn overs and absolutely shite use of the footy. I couldn’t even express my anger in words, just sounds and I sounded like an agitated whale. I looked over at the boys, both sitting forward, faces set like concrete and eyes arched glued to the TV. I don’t think they even looked away from play to eat, somehow the kafta found its way to their mouths.

The score was too close for my liking, everyone was on edge from lack of goals. Then after many walking stick/old man jokes Fletcher silenced me as he launched one through from 65, sending the Essendon crew crazy. I couldn’t even look at Tony and I began to sink into the couch between the red and black scarves of Theresa and Joanne.

Then the wind turned. Suddenly we had a cute lead, not ‘Jon Ralph cute’ but more like ‘Luke Darcy cute’, and in the rain a ‘Luke Darcy cute’ lead can get you in the clear. Seedsman was everywhere! It’s like he’d suddenly decided that he was going to be Nathan Buckley in a backyard game of footy.

Finally I could sit up a bit more and I didn’t cover my eyes the second time Travis Cloke kicked for goal. Now it was the Essendon crew who were defeated. An unimpressed Joanne had taken off her scarf and wrapped it over her head like a tayta (Lebanese for nanna), all Theresa cared about were close-ups of Zaharakis and with Fasolo out I had nobody to stare at.

Tony got up and left as he had a drumming booking for a wedding entrance. As much as we love him Christian and I just really wanted to see Tony cry. I’m a good friend, I promise. I would have sat next to him and handed him tissues and all haha. But never fear I wasn’t going to let him off that easy. As the siren sounded I flooded his phone with messages, even taking the trouble to spell out:

C-

O-

L-

L-

I-

N-

G-

W-

O-

O-

D!

One letter per text as to send his phone into celebration spaz. And In true Tony style his reply was too colourful to repeat LOL!

Talk of plans to go to the Round 22 game were now in action. How many of us will not be escorted out the stadium you ask? I guess we might find out soon! Go PIES!

About Danielle Eid

Im 23, cute and most importantly im the Collingwood Football Club's very own PRINCESS!! :) A Latrobe Uni graduate from Bachelor of Journalism. Admirer of Samantha Lane and Jon Ralph. Not your typical 'Robot Journalist' Loves Alex Fasolo

Comments

  1. Luke Reynolds says

    Jon Ralph and Luke Darcy are cute??

    Very entertaining as always Dani. Would love to go to a Lebanese BBQ one day!
    For your sake I hope A.Fasolo is back in the team soon! Always great beating Essendon on ANZAC Day.

  2. Yes Luke but Ralphy is a dash cuter!
    Thanks :))
    I don’t know what happened to Fas…performance slump maybe? I just know i miss those guns of his :((

  3. Shane Johnson says

    Loved the yarn.Well done. Good luck with the journalism

  4. Many thanks Shane! :)

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