Coughing epidemic in AFL coaching ranks

The winter is certainly upon us and I am very concerned about the health of several senior coaches in the AFL. It seems that the stress of coaching is getting to some and bringing with it the onset of vicious coughs and other symptoms.

The coughs seem to come at stressful times during games I have watched on television this year. The other symptoms include bulging eyes, and involuntarily, arms and hands being thrown into the air.  Other poor coaches have had their eyes apparently unfocussed and looking up at things on the wall, just above their heads. It seems they my be hallucinating. I can’t imagine what they could be looking at.

There is one premiership coach who seems to get coughing fits when the game is going against his team and he even has to put his hand over his mouth to stop the coughing. He too has been seen to have darting eyes above his head. It is strange that the symptoms seem to disappear at the end of games and his relief is apparent as he has even been seen smiling and walking with his son on the ground after recent games.

One poor coach, who took on a famous club, where he too played has even had his chair spun around during the coughing fits, so that he cannot watch the games temporarily.

Another from down Geelong way, has even had to walk out of his box with presumed coughing fits, during crucial times in games.

There is a very senior coach who seems to have the darting eyes problem on a regular basis over the top of his glasses. I think he even forgot his glasses recently. Poor chap.

Another coach for the tigers has to regularly throw his head back and drink water or coke during the coughing fits. Still, another coach from the west, continually chews on a pen to stop his coughing problems.

Miraculously, all of the apparent coughing problems disappear towards the end of games with winning coaches, but the losing ones seems to develop a quietness and despondency, but not coughing fits, thankfully.

I swear,  I hope the spring comes quickly for these poor coaches. One would hope that by September the coughs and colds will be over, but then again , there is always finals fever to bring on the coughing fits again!

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