Earl O’Neill recently offered some fashion advice to Almanac readers – well, blokes really. He paid little attention to skivvies. This piece by Tom Junod, published in GQ, offers some counterbalance. [I am eternally grateful to Jimmy ‘Two Bob’ Weston for a number of things – and this is one of them. JTH]
Search Results for: Earl O'Neill
The 2016 ‘Pearler’ Cup – Round Twenty
August 12, 2016 by 7 Comments
Earl O’Neill deciphers his notes from a weekend of footy and other less important sports
Almanac NFL – The 2023 Dan Orlovsky Cup: Week 12
November 30, 2023 by Leave a Comment
If you want to compare football codes, at least do it from an informed perspective. Earl O’Neill exposes the ‘idiotic complaints against American football’.
Almanac NFL – The 2023 Scott Mitchell Cup: Week Eleven
November 23, 2023 by Leave a Comment
In this week’s look at the NFL, Earl O’Neill takes a look at quarterbacks, the big money men of the game. But are they worth the huge salaries they attract?
Almanac NFL: The 2023 Jim Caldwell Cup – Week Ten
November 15, 2023 by 1 Comment
The glory days of the New England Patriots are a distant memory. Earl O’Neill explains what has gone wrong – and what might be next for the Pats.
Almanac NFL: The 2023 Lomas Brown Cup – Week Nine
November 8, 2023 by Leave a Comment
We are now nine weeks into the NFL season. Earl O’Neill details his highlights from the weekend.
Almanac NFL – The 2023 Bobby Layne Cup: Week Seven
October 26, 2023 by 2 Comments
Earl O’Neill continues his coverage of the NFL. Today he explains his allegiance to the Detroit Lions. It’s not an easy gig!
Almanac NFL: The Joey Harrington Cup 2023 – Week 6
October 20, 2023 by Leave a Comment
Earl O’Neill presents his thoughts on the progress of some of the new quarterback acquisitions and movements in the NFL.
Almanac NFL – The 2023 Lem Barney Cup: Week 4
October 5, 2023 by 2 Comments
How do you create an NFL franchise? Combine big bucks and a cluey brainstrust with a good quarterback and you’re well on the way. Earl O’Neill combs the record books to demonstrate how it works – or doesn’t, in some cases.
The 2020 Backroads Cup – Round 20
August 4, 2020 by 4 Comments
Earl O’Neill rolls down the windows and lets out the clutch on a Grand Tour of footy as it should have been played in Round 20 of the AFL season as God intended. His car radio has the round the grounds summary of the weekend’s footy scores brought to you by Hanley’s Agricultural Supplies for all your bulk fertiliser needs.
The 2020 Fred Smith Cup – Round 18
July 22, 2020 by Leave a Comment
The good news is AFL is up to Round 18 in the season as God intended. And Earl O’Neill is organising the Grand Final entertainment this year. Name the band and read the weekend’s results. Bad news is Earl’s gone in the shockers just like his Monaros.
The 2020 Cool Dry Cup – Round 17
July 14, 2020 by 3 Comments
Earl O’Neill has joined the long term injury list but he managed to catch all the weekend’s games from the rehab mat. A comprehensive review of AFL Round 17 as God, Gillon and the original fixture intended (not in that order).
The 2020 Creme de Menthe Cup – Round 15
July 2, 2020 by 4 Comments
The end of June sees us 15 rounds into the AFL Season as God intended (and passed the match reports onto his son Earl). Club Presidents Kochie and Cochie have been fighting over the season’s spoils. Earl O’Neill has the inside story on how they sorted out their differences. [Another episode in Earl’s parallel, fictional footy season – Ed.]
The 2020 Jeff Beck Cup – Round 14
June 24, 2020 by 1 Comment
Take 5 footy fans, Earl O’Neill and Dave Brubeck bring you the AFL season as intended. Round 14 (whoever heard of Round 3 in June – ridiculous) sees the Tigers winning and the Bombers triumphing under new coach Rutten. Remember the good old days when you sacked the coach and not the season?
The 2020 Rabbit Hole Cup – Round 13
June 18, 2020 by Leave a Comment
Earl O’Neill runs his eyes over the teams that had the Round 13 bye and summarises the weekend results. Why believe in a footy season with 16 minute quarters, no crowds and a night Grand Final in summer asks Earl?
The 2020 ‘Onya Liz’ Cup – Round 12
June 9, 2020 by Leave a Comment
Earl O’Neill welcomes the bye in a long, hard (imaginary-Ed) AFL season. Round 12 brought some upsets and a cracking Queens Birthday match at the ‘G. Earl runs his eye over the resting teams and reckons Kenny from Camperdown will be taking in the Grand Annual from his back porch next season.
The 2020 Dave Flanagan Cup – Round 11
June 2, 2020 by 5 Comments
Earl O’Neill reflects on the life and times of Dave Flanagan and how his larrikin spirit inspired the growth of AFL across the country. Condolences to his wives, children, and spiritual and legal advisers. Round 11 results seem like an afterthought with the ladder leaders coming back to the pack in an (imaginary – Ed.) season full of surprises.
The 2020 Ruth Gordon Cup – Round 8
May 12, 2020 by 4 Comments
Earl O’Neill dishes the dirt on the coach, the thief, his wife and his mother. Earl’s not naming names yet but players at home can put the pieces together. Breakfast in bed for Mother’s Day has never had such complicated overtones. Thankfully, Round 8 of the AFL delivered some terrific footy to distract us. (Imagine how feral an imaginary footy press would be about this particular imagined season – Ed).
The 2020 Oscar Compson Cup – Round 6
April 28, 2020 by 1 Comment
Earl O’Neill reviews the results from the Anzac round of AFL matches. Plenty of surprises on the field but the biggest shock this week was an AFL star breaking down the barriers Ian Roberts shattered 25 years ago in the NRL. (Earl’s imagined season is taking us down some interesting pathways – Ed).
The 2020 Martha Graham Cup – Round 19
Earl O’Neill is on some heavy duty opiates for his joint pain. The result is a psychedelic imagining of making footy telecasts more creative and captivating through interpretive dance. Come for the LSD trip (Luke, Sandy and Dwayne) and stay for how Round 19 scores might have shaken out in a better world.