THE PRE WRAP – ROUND IX

What a week it’s been in Footy Eddie.  Of course there’s the Big One tonight.  We’ll all be tuned in for that.  Although our hearts go out to those devotees of Better Homes & Gardens who will find themselves at a loose end.  Surely Channel Kerry has a second band they can broadcast it on?

Speaking of The Cats, they’re still not sure about Gary Junior.  They seem pretty certain that he’s leaving on a jet plane, not knowing when he’ll be back again sometime real soon.  (Surely not before another Brownlow and Pennant with his good old buddies down at Sleepy Hollow Wrap? – Ed)  They’re calling for the first five draft picks of 2011 and a million dollars in unmarked bills as compensation from the appalling Football League.  That seems fair.

Killer Kowalski has laid down a challenge to our caring sharing community.  Akka’s not too sure about it all.  (Actually Wrap, he’s very sure about it – Ed)  Says he knew a tough and courageous footballer up in Brisbane who was gay.  Was that in the biblical sense Akka?  Anyway Akka, what’s wrong with being honest?  Our alternate Prime Minister has no problem with it.  And we thought that someone who dyes his hair and beard different colours wouldn’t have any problem with someone who was a bit different from the mainstream.

Man Mountain Hille irons out another player after the kick, both feet off the ground.  Good stuff, and don’t get us wrong here, we haven’t joined the Mothers of Melbourne, but it’s outside the rules.  But not the rules of the Invertebrates at Jellymont House.  How come he’s playing and Daniel Jackson gets three weeks for admonishing Campbell Brown, something the umpires should have done on the day.  Coach Knighter has no problem with it.  Let’s see how long the Invertebrates defy common sense & decency.

Another player has been pinged for cocaine possession.  How come only sports people get tested for drug use?  Why not all workplaces?  Starting with those people in dangerous or life threatening occupations, like lawyers, scaffold workers, security guards & politicians.

In the land where pedal power is king, Vandemonian Matty Goss has joined Cadel & Matty Lloyd in helping fly the Southern Cross with a stage win in the Giro d’Italia while over in California Brett Lancaster took the overall lead in the Tour.  All the Australian wins have been in soaking rainy conditions.  Cycling must be a winter sport too, eh?  (No Nurelle, it’s a different Matty Lloyd – Ed)

But enough of my gabbin, let’s see who’s going to be feeling fine after Round IX.

Collingwood. v Geelong on The Hallowed Turf tonight.  Never mind the hoo-ha, these Mighty Maggies are the real thing.  Sure they were out West this time last week, but adversity never worries Real Champions.  With both outfits at full strength, this is full dress rehearsal.  The Sage Pundits can’t split them, but The Bagmen have The Pies at $2.05 and The Moggies at $1.78.  Look, you could go on for pages on the match-ups.  They’re both playing fantastic Footy so toss a coin or go with your heart.  Our application has been accepted around at the Lexus Centre and we’ve gone into the draw for Bandwagon tickets, so The Wrap Loungeroom will be decked in Black&White as we Stick Side By Side with Joffa & The Army To Uphold The Magpie Name.

The Shinboners v The Sons of The West at Ethelred Stadium at the traditional time.  The Northerners are playing without fear, as you would expect of any Playing Group that pulls on the Royal Blue & White Verticals and is coached by Bradley Scott.  However, The Bulldogs are playing for their season.  Bulldog Barry’s contribution last week up in the National Capital had Madame Secretary in raptures.  Having her waiting in the wings should his form falter should spur him on to carry The Kennel Coughs across the line in this one.  (Barry, please spare us from No Gillard, No Bulldogs– Ed)  It’s The Tricolours from us.  At $1.26 and the little Aussie Battler in a tailspin and the Bourse in meltdown, they would have to be the Wrap Investment Opportunity of The Round.

The Swans v The Barry Crockers on The Other Cricket Ground at the traditional time.  The Anchormen won’t have to wear their white away clash strips with the Purple Anchor and will be on full show in their parrot tops.  However, the trip, last week’s let down and Sydney OTR doing it for Captain Kirk should be overwhelming.  We’re going with The Homeside in this one.

The Bombers v The Tigers at The G for The Dreamtime Match.  The Tiges, through poor draft choices over  the years, are going in without a Dreamtime player. The Bombers are down to a couple due to the transfer of Andy Lovett & the suspension of Nathan Lovett-Murray.  It won’t distract from The Battle of The Sashes. The Dons have lauded it over The Tiges in recent years, but every now and again The Punt Road Underdogs slip in a win.  Richmond are hitting some form, although it should be pointed out that it was against fellow easy beat Hawthorn.  They could surprise in this one, but with The Gliders on a roll it seems unlikely. They know how to force turnovers and how to take advantage of them.  Turning the ball over is an unflattering statistic in which The Tigers lead The Competition. Essendon.

The Fuchsias v The Chokers up in the Top End on Saturday night.  Both were pathetic last week.  One with a 2nd Half fade out, the other with a Final Stanza capitulation.  It’s a Melbourne home game but a trip up The Ghan is no big deal for The Tealers.  The Dees ’selectors have stuck with their yard of pump water from BGS and have regained Wonaemirri & Miller.   If The Power are the real thing they’ll win this.  The Power From Port in True Port Adelaide Tradition.

Adelaide v Brisbane at Crow Park for the early one on Sunday.  The Chardonnays are decidedly unwooded at the moment and have blooded New Boy Gunston. (I hope he remembers to bring the cigarette papers to patch up the shaving cuts – Ed)  Boss Voss has named Brown & Fevola but we’re not too sure what to make of that.  You have to presume, for the sake of the coach’s credibility, that they’re fit to play.  If they are, The Maroons should be too good for The Crows, even at home.  Having said that, we’re waiting for the Adelaide breakout game for Season 2010.  They showed signs of it in the closing stages last round against North.  If Vossy has been foxing with his key forwards, this could be it.  Bock & Rutten are two of the best in the caper.  Look, we’ll change our minds here, The Chardonnays to pop their cork.  At $2.05, the same as The Bagmen are quoting on Carringbush, they’re hardly a roughie, but they could give you a break in the staffroom tipping competition.

Carlton v Hawthorn under cover on Sunday.  Are you kidding?  The flags along La Via Lygon are at full mast and the paperboys, with Young Benito back on his favourite Faraday Street Corner , are shouting the news – Carlton are coming.  So is Christmas, but they should get past The Mayblooms on Sunday.  The Football World will be watching to see if The Mustard Pots have any keenness left in them.  Even if they find something of their old selves, The Bluebaggers are on a roll. The $1.30 looks juicy too.

The Eagles v The Feeling Faints out on the Coast for the late one on Sunday.  If The Sainters aren’t in freefall they should be able to regroup and bring home the bacon.  Having said that, the Coasters should not be taken lightly.  They have a forward set-up that is dangerous when it fires up and they’ve strung together two on the Stewie Trott.  Kennedy is firing and La Cras kicked a bag last week against The Dees.  However, St Kilda are OTR and should be just that little bit too disciplined, however, if Cox & The Nat get the upper hand and their rovers capitalize on it, fast ball movement into the wobbly Saint Kilda defence may find them out.  The Iconic Zac was back to his Hawthorn best last week, and SOS would have been giving him some one on one tuition on Tuesday & Thursday night.  We’ll stick with The Reigning Runners Up just one more time.  The Sainters.

Good tippi9ng and even better punting.

And remember, if you read it in the Wrap you’ll know it’s not crap.

About John Mosig

I’m an Aussie Rules tragic who can remember, as a four year old, shaking the hand of Captain Blood in the rooms just before he ran out onto the ground after half time, as my Old Man slipped him a packet of under-the-counter Craven A cork tipped. Now it’s my turn to take my grandson Ben through the ritual of character building that is the journey through PUNT ROAD to the outside world.

Comments

  1. I should just hope that Port would win in the Top End.

    (Not to take anything away from the Demons and how they’ve been going this year).

  2. John Mosig says:

    I hope you haven’t done any thing silly Adelaide, like investing the rent money on The Tealers.

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