The poncho ain’t pretty

You’re sitting ground level two rows from the front, on a cold Friday night at the MCG. The cold wind is blowing from the grey daunting skies and then it happens. It starts to rain.

Rain is a beautiful thing especially when you are rugged up indoors wearing multiple layers and Ugg Boots watching the footy from the privacy of your bed.

When you are at the footy however it becomes quite a dilemma.

I like to take pride in my appearance, unless I just can’t be bothered and im staying at home, but yes otherwise I like to be ‘princess pretty’ even at the footy.

I go through my normal makeup and hair ritual for the footy, mostly to disprove the whole ‘Collingwood ferals’ hypothesis.

So when it rains the dilemma to face is obvious; to poncho or not to poncho?!

Fashion-wise ponchos are a serious NO-NO!

I mean, who looks good in a loose plastic bag?! It’s impossible to look attractive in a poncho. This leads me to my next point, sitting as close to the players as can be and wearing a poncho isn’t going to help the possible…no, highly unlikely elevation to WAG status. Sometimes players DO look into the crowd, they do! Especially after the game when they run down to give away mini footballs, and the poncho look, I doubt its going to be a turn on.

“I first saw her at the footy in the crowd wearing a poncho.” Said NO FOOTY PLAYER EVER.

 

Wear the poncho and suffer the consequences of poncho hair and looking like a potato sack or just a blob really. Guys aren’t as effected they can just rip off the sleeves of their ponchos and show off their guns… if it comes to that, but overall they do get away with it better. Most blokes seem to like the device; Collingwood’s very own Andrew Pickering says “ponchos are a great invention. I like the secretive feel of them.”

That’s great Andrew but you don’t look like a blobby potato when you wear one.

So I guess the only solution for footy fashionistas is to check the weather for rain and get some seats under the roof, oh and don’t forget a black and white umbrella for the walk to the carpark.