The ‘Off-season’ is now the ‘On’

It’s that time of the year

To sit down with a beer

And watch hour upon hour of cricket

 

But this footy off-season

(And for very good reason)

The focus has been on Kurt Tippett

 

The lad from up north

Told the Crows he was off

But that’s when the real trouble started

 

For the Crows had been paying

Sneaky cash for Kurt’s playing

It was tears as the two parties parted

 

But it’s not just the Crows

And their troublesome woes

Which have claimed all the post-season headlines

 

There’s been more going on

Than the actual season

Yes, these are very strange footballing times

 

There was Jonathan Brown

When the car knocked him down

Though machine came off feeling more seedy

 

And big Izzy Falou

(Exit stage, take a bow)

Had enough of eccentric old Sheedy

 

Old Mick’s now a Blue

And he’s plenty to do

Though the club it went missing through trade week

 

While Ben Hudson it seems

Doesn’t know what ‘stop’ means

His retirements are made with tongue in-cheek

 

There have been claims of tanking

No, the Dees are not thanking

Former player McLean for his outburst

 

And Ade Anderson’s gone

Leaving Gil and Foghorn

The news broken to us by the Age first

 

Footy welcomed free agents

It’s now more than a game gents

For club loyalty counts for so little

 

BJ left the Saints reeling

Many clubs tried to steal `im

Now he’ll help the Dons out in the middle

 

There’s been many more stories

Of mistakes and of glories

‘Player farts!’ now the front page it’s on,

 

So who really needs football,

All we need is fresh scandal,

For the footy off-season’s now the ‘on’