EASY (1 point)
1. Fill in the the gap: Shane Watson features in an ad for Brut that contains the catchphrase: “Brut, — ck yourself”
2. Australia is given a new cricket ball. Mitchell Starc is given the first over with it. Using the chart below, how many of Mitchell Starc’s deliveries are on a ‘good’ length?
3. True or False. Nathan Lyon could pass for a small-town pharmacist?
4. If a dropped catch/missed stumping is worth 40 runs, calculate Matthew Wade’s net contribution to this Test Match.
5. Mike Hussey bowls a ball down leg side. The batsman is in his crease by at least a foot and Wade doesn’t take the ball. Given it is Mike Hussey’s last Test, do you refer the decision to the third umpire?
6. If x = 294 and y = 432, what must z = for x-y+x = interesting Test Match.
7. What has been the most impressive collapse in Australian sport this week?
a) The crowd barrier that collapsed on Novak Djokovic after his singles win at the Hopman Cup in Perth Monday.
b) The Sri Lankan middle order
MODERATE (2 points)
8. Mark Taylor says it is difficult for Matthew Wade to take a catch ‘standing up’ to the spinner. How much more difficult it would be:
a) standing 10 yards back, and
b) lying down.
9. An over of fast-medium pace takes 150 seconds. An over of spin takes 110 seconds. Based on 60 overs of fast-medium pace and 30 overs of spin per day and allowing for a delay of 120 seconds per dismissal and an average of eight dismissals a day, how much Sheffield Shield cricket will be played over the next two weeks?
10. Swisse is “the choice of the Australian Cricket Team”. Define ‘choice’ and it’s net worth to Cricket Australia.
11. If Angelo Matthews can run 10.42 metres down the pitch, pause for .83 of second, turn and be run out by 40cm, was there a run in it?
12. Cricket Australia is seeking a television rights deal of $100 million a year for the full package of domestic Test matches, international and domestic one-day matches, Sheffield Shield matches and the Big Bash Twenty20 product. Is this:
a) an ambit claim,
b) wishful thinking, or
c) given Lachlan Murdoch is in charge at Channel Ten, probable.
If your answer is c), name three scenarios scarier than Charlie Pickering being involved in any form of cricket commentary.
13. If Mr. Cowan is dismissed for 13 runs in the second innings, calculate the probability of Mr. Cowan touring India.
14. At 9.30pm Shane Warne leaves Glasgow, travelling along the A74 to Carlisle on the northbound carriageway at 165km/h in his Jaguar XFR V8. At 10pm a busload of rugby players on an end of season trip leave Carlisle, travelling southbound on the A74 carriageway at 78km/h. Given the distance between Glasgow and Carlisle is 158km at what point does Shane Warne become the day’s biggest cricket story?
15. If Melbourne Stars right-arm fast-medium bowler Daniel Worrall was booked by police for doing 69km/h in a 60km/h zone in Richmond. On what day of the week would:
a) The TAC reconsider their partnership with the Melbourne Stars
b) Daniel Worrall get fined/suspended/released from the Melbourne Stars
HARD (3 points)
16. In 50 words or less, justify Mahela Jayawardene’s field placement towards the end of Australia’s first innings.
17. If a = the number of overs, b = the age of the bowler, c = the amount of negative press coverage and d = the batshit insanity of the Australian selectors, express Cricket Australia’s rotation policy as a modelled mathematical equation.
18. Which is more ridiculous, a or b?
a) Thilan Samaraweera’s shot selection when Sri Lanka was 3-158 in its second innings, a lead of 20 with more than two days to play, or
b)
19. The Coca-Cola Beach contains 7-tonnes of Newcastle sand. Six contractors at $24-an-hour can remove this sand at a rate of a third-of-a-tonne an hour. Alternatively, a 20kg bag of Richgro Play Sand retails at Bunnings for $6.95. If it takes 380kg of sand to sandbag the entry to the Channel Nine commentary box to a height of 7-feet, what is the least amount of money it would take to not hear a plug for The Coca Cola Beach during the fourth day’s play?
20. If Michael Slater’s Channel Nine contract (gross) is a $1,000-a-day base salary with a $100 bonus for every ten thousand words, and his deals with KFC and Farmer’s Union Iced Coffee for the summer total $72,000 (gross), based on a five-month period (November-March) use the tax rate outlined in the table below to calculate how many hours he would need work in order to pay you enough money to join him for a game of barefoot bowls with Joel and Benji Madden from Good Charlotte. Note that you will be required to wear board-shorts with a suit jacket. (show your working)
About Craig Little
My heroes are all dead white males, mostly because that seems really attainable for me.
Questions for the ages Litza. Sadly, most particularly this age.
Answer to 14:
A trick question
If he was travelling northbound, he would be travelling towards Glasgow and would therefore be leaving Carlisle and was probably not far over the Scottish border
Having spent a few months working in Carlisle, serving beers to the afore-mentioned rugby team, I can assure all that a Jag XFR couldn’t have got me out of there quick enough.
The rugby boys were probably on the Guinness and Blackcurrents. Tipple of choice in those parts.
Carlisle Uni is well known for its Performing Arts program. Perhaps SKW had just finished some auditions for Shane Warne the Musical 2…
Haha. I had to stop at the 2 pointers, got too hard.
Would it be possible to combine Q 19 & 20 and sandbag Michael Slater?
I didn’t see Samaraweera’s shot, but I’m sure there is nothing more ridiculous than Brett Lee.
Tony Barber looks like he has two heads in that pic. The middle one must be a home viewer, surely not a celebrity?
I got 9 out of 20. Is that a standardised pass?
I’ll take Tony Danza thanks Litza.
Outstanding
Tony Danza… congratulations, you’ve won a collection of glassware, including perfume bottles and vases worth $501 from Isle of Wight Glass.
Apropos of nothing, my top 3 Sale of the Century hostesses:
1. Alyce Platt (Sparky)
2. Jo Bailey
3. Karina Brown
Andrew, Shane Warne’s entire adult life has been a performing arts program. Tonight was no exception.
Litza, you’re probably too young to remember her but I still reckon Barbie Rogers, hostess of Sale of the Century’s predecessor, “$25,000 Great Temptation” (Channel 7, Monday and Wednesday nights at 7:30 I believe) was alright.